Alpha’s Strength(64)

Tears flowed from her eyes as he spoke, a steady stream falling down her face. “I wondered how long it would be until you got to the point, until you blamed me for Kyra’s death.”

“I don’t blame you for Kyra. I blame myself for Kyra. If you had been to the moon ceremony, you would know that. I should never have let you all continue going to that bar, not after I knew about it. I should have had my female pack members better protected. I blame myself. What I want to know is why my Healer was so unhappy that she drank herself into a stupor and couldn’t manage to call on the genetically driven, magical talents that allow her to save our lives when need be? For the love of all that’s holy, what is going on? What are you so afraid of? Tell me, for fuck’s sake.”

She wiped at her eyes. “What’s the point of any of it?”

Well, he certainly hadn’t expected that. Cyrus adjusted Betsy until she lay across the seat and he could stand up. The plane had hit a spot of turbulence, and he was certain that, had the flight attendant not been a member of his pack who wouldn’t dare contradict him, he would have been ordered back. But his sister had made a statement that was better addressed face to face.

He placed his hand on her arm and squatted in front of her. “Lake, I’d like you to explain what you mean.” He should have gotten his degree in psychiatry instead of a master’s in business.

“Are you out of your mind? You’re going to get killed, hitting the ceiling or something.”

“Oh, imagine that, you’d have to save my life.” He waited a beat, wondering if he should finish his thought. “Or maybe you’d let me die because there’s no point to any of it?”

She gasped, covering her mouth. “Cyrus, that is not what I meant.”

“Then I guess you’d better explain, sister, before I decide you’re unfit for your position.” Truth was, he’d been considering that all day. But what would they do without Lake? He’d have to actually advertise for a new Healer from another pack. Alexei would torment him about it for years. Lake had always been one hell of an asset for his pack, the Healer to rule all Healers.

But whether or not she could work for him anymore was moot. His sister had said something really dark, and as much as the Alpha of the pack had to consider logistics, as her brother, he’d freaked out inside.

“I mean we go about every month doing the same things. We get up, come work in the concrete hell you think of as heaven, and go home. And then we do it all again except for two days out of every month where we go to upstate New York and change into our animals.” She sniffed. “Oh, I’m sorry. There are also the times I go into heat and then I get to pick out someone I don’t care about to have sex with, which is like scratching an itch or putting on a Band-Aid.”

Cyrus let her words sit for moment. “Are you saying you’re bored?”

“Not bored, brother. Miserable. What am I doing with my life? Sitting at a desk acting as your assistant? You don’t need me. Ten different pack members could take over that job and do it better. I’m offering nothing, doing nothing. And the one time I had to step up and do something crucial, I screwed up. And now Kyra is dead. Whatever you say about it being on you, it’s on me. End of story.”

“Sweetheart.” He shook his head. “I’m not sure what you want me to say about all of this. I built that business for all of us. Don’t you remember what it was like before? Or were you too young? Everyone running for their lives. Losing jobs. Changing into werewolves in the middle of the street in the rush to get home?”

“There has to be a middle ground, Cyrus.”

“No,” he shouted and then lowered his voice. Everyone remained completely still. “Not on this. Not after Kyra. I’m sorry you are so disappointed with life. I’ll work on figuring out something to make you happy.” Because that was his role, he saw to the needs of his people. “But I’m not compromising on the work issue. You may not go into the human hospitals where anything could happen and we could be exposed. I will not allow it.”

“I know.” She turned away from him. “I’m not drinking anymore. You don’t have to worry about that.”

“Good.” He stood up and pinched her cheek. “I know I can count on you.”

He didn’t believe that, but she needed to hear it. Maybe saying it would make it true. He moved back to his seat and adjusted Betsy again. Lake blinked rapidly and then nodded to him.

There were things he would compromise about and things he would not. After Kyra’s death, there could be no relenting. If they did things his way, everyone went home to their families at night. He shook his head. They had to get in and out of Montana before the full moon. Seven days until it hit. His pack couldn’t be forced to change so far from home.