I swallowed hard. I'd worn this with the expectation that he would have me take it off. My underwear and bra were simple white cotton for that exact reason. They covered more of me than a bikini would've, which was precisely why I'd chosen them. It wasn't quite the same as wearing a bathing suit, but close enough for me not to be completely embarrassed.
I untied the belt and let my dress fall open. This, I knew, was part of what he needed, to see that if a Sub went with him, she would do whatever he asked within the parameters they set. He needed to know that he was desirable enough for a woman to take off her clothes for him.
Not that I thought of him like that.
No matter what my treacherous body was saying as heat ran through it.
His eyes ran over me and I struggled to stay still. I didn't look at his face, not wanting to see whatever it was he was feeling. If I saw desire there or even pure lust, I wasn't sure what I'd do. But I also knew myself well enough to know that I didn't want to see nothing. I wanted, at least, admiration from him. I was shallow enough to admit that.
I waited, then, for him to tell me what to do next.
“How...what...” He scowled and shoved his hand into his hair. “Dammit!”
He turned away or started to.
I was going to lose him. I knew that, if he left now, if he stopped this, he'd never do it again. He'd see this as another weakness.
I reached out and grabbed his right wrist. He stopped, his eyes going to my face.
“I thought you weren't supposed to touch me without permission.”
I instantly let go, the submissive part of me automatically responding to his tone as much as his words. I saw a flash of surprise, and then another flash of something else. He reached out and took my hand. With our eyes locked together, he raised my hand to his face.
Heat rushed down my fingers as soon as they came in contact with his cheek. I'd touched him before, of course, and in much more intimate ways than this. Or, at least in much more intimate places. Somehow, though, spreading my palm on X's uninjured cheek felt like...more.
“When I want you to touch me, I'll tell you,” he said quietly. “Or show you.”
I nodded, mutely.
“Never touch my left side.”
Emotion made his voice thick, but I didn't respond. I knew he wouldn't want me to. He would see my compassion as pity, and I never wanted him to think that I pitied him.
“I'll do the touching.”
My stomach lurched in anticipation as if he was actually going to do what he said. He wouldn't though. Not a real touch.
It didn't matter. We'd accomplished part of what I'd wanted. He now knew how he felt about being touched, and wouldn't have to suffer the embarrassment of snapping at a Sub for something she couldn't know.
All of this went through my mind in a matter of seconds, my hand still on his cheek.
Then he was moving toward me, and before I realized what he intended to do, his mouth was coming down on mine.
Chapter Six
Nori
I should've run the moment I felt things between us starting to shift.
I should've not even acted on this crazy idea to begin with.
I should've shoved him away and run.
All of these thoughts and more flashed through my head, rapid-fire, in the split second between realizing that X intended to kiss me, and when his lips actually touched mine.
Then he was kissing me and any attempt at reasonable thinking went out the window.
I'd had good kisses, and I'd had bad kisses. The sort that curled my toes, and the kind that made me never want to see the person again. Tanner had been a great kisser, always knowing the right amount of pressure, when to open my mouth, and whether or not I wanted tongue. He'd been sure of himself and his abilities, but even when he was dominating me, there was always the sense of restraint.
There was no such restraint with X.
His mouth was hard, demanding against mine. Hungry. I couldn't think of another word to describe it as his teeth scraped across my bottom lip. I gasped and his tongue slid into my mouth. The hand I had on his cheek was now in his hair, fingers curling into the silky strands. When my nails scratched his scalp, he made a sound in the back of his throat. An almost desperate, needy sound.
In the years I'd been with Tanner, I'd never heard him make that noise. No man I'd ever been with had made that sound. Like I was everything, the only thing that mattered.
It was that thought that jerked me back to reality.
Rather than pushing him away, I stepped back, breaking the kiss. Heat flooded my face and I quickly pulled my dress together, covering myself. I didn't say a word – not an apology or a condemnation – as I fled.
He didn't say anything either, and I was grateful for that as I made my way down the hallway. No calling after me, no chasing. I climbed the stairs as quickly as I could, grateful that I wouldn’t have to deal with him on top of my own chaotic emotions.