I was only starting to come down when he rolled me onto my stomach. His hands squeezed my ass and pushed me up onto my knees. My chest was against the bed, muscles still quivering, when he slid inside me. He made a sound that told me he was enjoying himself as much as I was.
Suddenly, a part of me wished that he wasn't just enjoying himself, but that he was losing control. He moved inside me with hard, sure strokes, hitting all the right spots to make me feel good. I liked that about him. Liked that he knew my body so well, knew all of the ways to bring me pleasure. I liked that he found pleasure in me as well.
But just once, I wished he'd need me.
I pushed the thought aside as he slid his hand around my waist and down between us. His fingers found my clit and began to place just the right amount of pressure on it, moving in the same, firm circles that he always used to make me come when he was getting close. They worked now just as well as they always had, and I found myself falling over the edge.
He followed moments later, his body stiffening behind mine. He stayed there for a moment, buried deep inside me, his hands on my hips. And then he was pulling out and climbing off the bed. I rolled onto my side, away from the bathroom door.
Physically, I was sated, my body a limp, boneless mass. Emotionally, mentally...I was something else. I just wasn't sure what. Not yet.
When he came back, he came with a washcloth and cleaned me up before tossing the cloth backward into the clothes hamper. He pulled the blankets over us as he eased himself in behind me. It wasn't until his fingers started to trace up and down my arm that I realized he hadn't fallen asleep.
“Do you want to talk about it?” His voice was quiet.
I sighed. “I don't, really, but I think we need to.”
He tucked some hair behind my ear. “I think you're right.”
There was no surprise in his voice and I rolled onto my back so I could see him. The room wasn't completely dark, the light from the bathroom enough so that I could see Tanner's familiar, handsome face. He was gorgeous and wealthy, understanding, articulate, everything any woman could ever hope to have in a man.
And I was no longer sure it was what I wanted.
“We've been together, what, almost four years?” he asked.
“Met a little over four years ago,” I answered. “Started dating six months after that.”
“And we've been good together, right?” he asked. He wasn't asking out of insecurity, I knew him well enough for that.
“We have.” I reached down and picked up his hand, raising it to my mouth to kiss the palm.
“And now, we've hit a plateau,” he continued. There was a soft smile on his face. “Actually, I think we hit it a few months ago.”
I nodded, the knot in my stomach easing as I realized we were thinking along the same lines. This wouldn’t be as hard as I'd feared.
“I care about you, Nori,” he said. “I love you, in a way.”
Those three words should have hurt, that he had to clarify what he said, but they didn't, and that told me, more than anything else, that my instincts were right.
“I feel the same,” I said. “We were so good together and I loved you. Still do, but not the way I thought I did. Not the way I want to.” The smile I gave was more wistful than sad.
“We were both right for each other at the time we met.” He brushed his knuckles across my jaw. “But I think we're both moving in different directions.”
I closed my eyes as I nodded. “I think you're right.”
He sighed, but there was nothing negative about the sound. It was everything I was feeling too. The fact that we were so in sync should've meant that we were perfect for each other.
“What does this mean?” I asked. I opened my eyes and met his. I didn't need light to know the exact shade of bright green his irises were. “I know, technically, it means we're breaking up, but...what does that mean?”
He slid his arm around my shoulder and pulled me against him. “Well, since the conversation is going so well, I'd like to think we could stay friends.”
I smiled as I rested my head on his shoulder. “I'd like that, Tanner. A lot.”
He kissed the top of my head. “Good. Because I'd hate to lose you completely.”
We lay there in silence as things settled between us. What we'd had was over, but it seemed like we were, at least, going to transition to something new rather than completely breaking apart. That was good. Tanner was a good friend. We were friends before we'd started dating. Granted, it had been mostly because we'd wanted to start dating, but still, the foundation was there.
Suddenly, I laughed, an honest-to-goodness laugh.
“What's so funny?” Tanner asked. “Don't tell me that now you're going to start laughing at how I am in bed?”