Allie's War Episodes 1-4(106)

He wasn’t there, I realized.
I’d been thinking about him, and he’d heard me.
Allie. Please...I need to see you.
I stood motionless by a men’s bathroom. I didn’t move, even when a man smiled at me as he left the swinging doors.
Allie, I’m sorry. I’m really—
I don’t want to talk about this, my mind blurted.
At his silence, I forced my thoughts back to neutral. I breathed in and out, once, forcing myself to be logical about this.
Revik, I thought at him. I took another breath, and my mind leveled more. Revik...you really don’t need to explain anything.
Allie, I do...
No, I sent. You don’t. I’m sorry I pushed before. You can have a divorce or whatever you want—
Not like this, he broke in. I don’t want to talk to you like this. I want to actually sit down and talk to you. Please.
I felt him trying to think how to persuade me.
Please, Allie...
He reached for me with his light and I jerked back, pulling away from him without thought. When he came close to me again, I threw up a wall.
He ran into it...then withdrew all at once.
It happened so fast, I barely understood what I’d done.
The silence went longer. I could tell it shocked him, my forcing him away. I felt pain on him, cloying, hard to keep out of my light. He was still hiding something from me, but I was trying to hide how I felt, too. It never seemed to end with us.
Revik, I sent. Really, I’m not just saying it...you don’t need to do this. I’m cool with us being friends...
Allie...
Eliah told me. So I get it now. I get what happened in Seattle. And I mean what I said about pushing you. I shouldn’t have...
Eliah? His thoughts grew still. What did he tell you, Allie?
Revik. I’m trying to say I’m sorry. Can’t we just—
No, he sent. Pain wafted off his light. Please...gods. Don’t make me talk to you like this...please, Allie...
I felt the vulnerability on his light again, and couldn’t answer.
His thoughts grew quiet, almost a murmur. Please, Allie. Please let me see you...please.
I stared out at the night sky, watching the horizon dip gently up and down.
Okay, I sent, reluctant. But God, Revik. We don’t have to do this—
You’re in the room? Is Eliah with you?
No. I hesitated long enough to find it odd he’d mentioned Eliah again. ...to both, actually. I’m on the other side of the ship. Near that big piano, with all the shops. We could meet out here, or—
What? His light changed. How did you get there?
I walked. The pain worsened again and I clutched my belly, trying my damnedest not to feel anything more from his light. Revik...I’m being careful. Eliah was all pissed off. I didn’t see anyone in the corridor, so—#p#分页标题#e#
Allie! Gods, baby, what are you doing...wait right where you are. I’ll be there. I’ll find you...
“Sister?”
I jumped, turning at the new voice.
I was distracted, half-sick from being so close to his light, distracted by what he’d just called me, unsure at first if I’d even heard him correctly, much less if someone really just spoke to me outside of the Barrier.
In any case, I expected it to be one of the guards, Eliah or Chandre or someone they’d sent to find me.
Revik’s presence faded, but I didn’t feel him pull away. Instead it felt like I walked into a dense wall and the wall entangled me, pushing him out. Beacon-like eyes met mine, glowing in the VR projections by the nearest kiosk. The flickering images there distracted me; I saw a woman gyrating in a tall monitor, wearing a sequined evening gown. The real person whose image it projected watched the transformed version of herself as if mesmerized.
“Are you lost, Sister?”
I blinked. A different woman held my arm. I watched her long fingers tighten on my skin. They looked blue in the light of the VR images. I struggled to focus on her face, couldn’t.
I will help you, she sent softly. You look very fatigued, sister.
Relief washed over me. I was tired, more tired than I could express. The woman with the opaque eyes purred a lulling sound...
...and I fell into a complicated strand of light.
The world phased.
It reemerged altered before I could catch it, as if my lenses reflected light from a different angle than they had before. Objects and people grew complex, multidimensional...expanding around me and sharpening from blurry outlines into a series of mathematical equations.
Snatches of music and light harmonized the perfect structure underlying their interweaving strands. A blueprint emerged from the harsh outlines...walls, floors, fixtures, furniture, potted trees, even people. The overhead chandelier exploded in a glitter of lit strands. Physical light broke down into particles, matter and energy, an achievement of base mechanical beauty that literally stopped my mind dead in its tracks.