Or me.
She didn’t say it, but Mama thought it. She felt it. As did Aurelia. She had been feeling it before, but now with Will and Violet’s good news, it was only more evident. The three of them were a family. Will, Violet, and the baby. It was time for both Mama and her to go.
Her mother moved for the door. “I shall leave at the end of the Season.” Her words rang with a finality that left no doubt in Aurelia’s mind she had decided.
She slipped from the room with a whisper of muslin. Aurelia uttered not a word, her mind spinning, thinking of her fate. She should leave with Mama. That much was clear. It was the right thing to do. The kindest thing for Will and Violet.
Another sudden realization jarred her. She would not be able to continue her drawing. At least not in the same way. Life in Town provided endless inspiration. There was endless material to be gleaned from members of the ton. She would not find such inspiration in Thurso. And even if she did, there would be no opportunities to share her caricatures. No more leaving them all about to be discovered. Thurso was but a small hamlet. She would be discovered if she even attempted it once.
An ache started at the center of her chest.
She had convinced herself she was making a difference. Perhaps it was arrogant of her to think she held such influence, but she thought she was giving a voice to the voiceless. With the exception of her first caricature, she used her skill, attempting to shed light on the transgressions that occurred every day throughout Society. An earl being overly free with his hands. An old dame spreading ugly rumors. A groom publicly mistreated by his employer. All of that she would lose if she left with Mama.
Unless she came up with a plan. Another way to remove herself from her brother’s house that did not require moving to Thurso.
A small knock preceded Cecily’s return to her chamber. “Aurelia?” she said as she came up behind her and began brushing her hair. “Is everything . . . well?”
She nodded numbly. Everything would be fine. She fixed a wobbly smile to her lips. She merely had to adjust her objectives and accept a husband. It wasn’t as though she was opposed to marriage. She just had never been very welcoming to prospective suitors. She simply had hoped for . . . more. Perhaps too much. Marriage to a man whose kiss did not make her want to wipe her mouth off afterward. She had admired her fair share of gentlemen. But all from afar. No one even potentially desirable had ever paid court to her. Her lack of dowry and rumors of her caustic wit ostensibly did not help in that endeavor.
Cecily gave up pressing her further for information and helped ready her for bed, casting her concerned looks.
“We’ll talk tomorrow,” Aurelia promised, feeling suddenly weary. “Good night.”
Nodding, Cecily dimmed the light and slipped from the chamber.
Alone again, Aurelia slid beneath the cool sheets of her bed and tucked her hands behind her head, staring into the shadowy recesses of the room, her mind backtracking over all the gentlemen who had approached her over the last few seasons—regrettably, a short list—and wondering if she should have given them more encouragement. She now wondered if any one of them might have suited. She was no grand prize, to be certain, but perhaps one of them could have made her happy. And she him.
Perhaps it wasn’t too late to try.
Chapter 5
Max had not made it two steps from the drawing room before Will and Declan waylaid him. With a clap on his shoulder, Will motioned in the direction of his office. “Come. Let us have a word.”
He hesitated only a moment. His friends no longer kept late hours. They were thoroughly domesticated. Gone were the days when they stayed out all night and returned home at dawn. A late night for them consisted of dinner before retiring to bed with their wives. Besotted. The both of them.