All He Really Needs(45)
She arched an eyebrow, speculation in her eyes. “Let me see if I’ve got this right…you’re mad at me because I’m not mad?”
He fumed for a moment while he formulated an answer. The building that housed Sheppard Capital was only a block off the loop; driving into the parking garage bought him a few minutes. He pulled into one of the visitor parking spots and killed the engine before answering.
“I just don’t get it. You should be pissed.”
“It’s not a big deal.”
“It should be.”
“No,” she snapped. “It shouldn’t be. Don’t you understand?”
Now her words were laced with the kind of indignation he’d been expecting all along.
“Apparently not.”
“That girl that I used to be, that terrified seven year old, she has nothing to do with me.”
“I don’t believe that.”
“But it’s true.” Sydney flung her car door open and jumped out. She slammed the door shut and waited until he’d climbed out, too, before saying, “That girl, the one who refused to talk to anyone at school because she was terrified that she’d be taken away by Child Protective Services. That girl, who used to Dumpster dive just to get enough food to eat. I am not that girl anymore. I haven’t been that girl since I was eleven.”
He watched her carefully from across the roof of the car, taking in the steely determination in her eyes, the firm line of her mouth, the furrow of her brow. The gentle slope of her neck, the way her ample chest rose and fell as she sucked deep breaths into her lungs. He might not have guessed she was upset at all, if those deep breaths didn’t hint at a racing heart.
Sydney was such a crazy bundle of contradictions. Hard, but not inflexible. Vulnerable, but not weak. And so completely different than anyone he’d ever met.
Her outburst—brief though it was—had told him more about her than any other conversation they’d ever had. As strong as she looked, as smart and competent as he knew she was, he had seen a totally different side of her. He had now glimpsed the child she’d once been. Alone, defenseless and afraid. The idea of that girl was burned into his brain, like the afterimage of a flash of lightning. It streaked across the sky with wicked speed, but it was still strong enough to burn the retinas. The very idea of that young girl was going to stay with him.
And even though he wasn’t the kind of guy who coddled his girlfriends, even though he wasn’t big on displays of emotion himself, he had the undeniable urge to pull her into his arms and comfort her.
As strong as that instinct was, equally strong was the warning bell roaring in his head that if he so much as tried it, she’d bolt. So instead, he just stood there, waiting for her next move.
Over the next minute, she incrementally got herself back under control. Then she straightened and gave the hem of her sweater a tug. A single strand of red-gold hair had slipped free from the knot at the base of her neck and she tucked it back behind her ear.
Finally, she slung the strap of her purse over her shoulder and headed for the parking garage elevator. “You coming?” she asked over her shoulder.
He nodded, following her. Would she ever stop amazing him? He didn’t think so.
The funny thing was, with every other woman he’d ever been with, sex had been the most interesting part of the relationship. But with Sydney he found her as fascinating outside of bed as she was in it. Maybe more.
For a relationship that had started out being just sex, it was getting surprisingly complicated. He had never meant to be this involved with her. He could only hope that because his awful invasion of her privacy hadn’t scared her off, then dealing with his complicated family garbage wouldn’t, either, because the truth was this new side of Sydney intrigued him. He wanted to see more of her. He just hoped he got the chance to.
*
As they took the elevator to the tenth floor offices of Sheppard Capital, Sydney was painfully aware of Griffin beside her, watching her carefully. She had the definite feeling that she’d failed some sort of test during their conversation in the car. She didn’t know what Griffin had expected of her.
Had he been itching for a fight? Was he looking for a reason to end things between them? She just didn’t know.
She honestly hadn’t been upset that he’d dug around in her past. She was a little disconcerted about what he’d learned because that was information she didn’t share with anyone. Those were things not even Tasha knew about her. She’d worked hard to put that all behind her. It had taken years of therapy to make peace with her past. But she honestly felt like she had moved on. She was a competent adult now. Not that child. No, her life wasn’t perfect, but she had a good job—one that paid well and challenged her. She had her own house. She had the stability she’d never had as a kid.