His eyes darkened and he snatched the pillow from me. "Don't hide yourself from me."
I wanted to point out that he was the one hiding from me…Mr. Pajama Pants! But I didn't want to argue. It was pointless and we had more important matters to discuss. Like, our relationship for starters…and maybe his sexual desires. We needed to discuss those too.
When Jace didn't say anything else, I decided to take the bull by the horns. I mean, really take it by the horns and flail it around a little. "Do you still want to fuck humiliation and pain into me, Jace?"
Horror with a sheen of excitement flitted through his eyes. He ran a hand through his hair and glared at me. "Stop with the language, Olivia. It's rude."
"Answer my question." I ignored his demand. It really was silly.
"I do." There was no emotion in his voice. "But I don't need it with you."
"What do you mean?"
"With other women, I have no desire to be gentle. I do not make love to women, Olivia. I make love to you."
"But you fuck them?"
His jaw twitched but he didn't scold me for my language. "I do."
"Why?"
"Why what?" He was genuinely confused.
"Why do you want to abuse them and not me?"
He flinched. "Is that the way you see it? Do you see my desires as abuse?"
"Um, yeah Jace." I shook my head, feeling slightly bewildered. "It is abuse."
"They are consenting women, Olivia." Jace replied tightly. "They know what they're getting into."
"Do they?" I asked. "Really?"
His nod was clipped. "They do. And if they don't I release them from their contract." He sighed. "I don't do this with the intention of screwing up someone's life, Olivia. It's a preference. Albeit a fucked-up one, but it's a preference none-the-less."
"But, you've seriously hurt people, Jace."
"I know that." He nodded. He knew I was talking about Lexie. "I've only hurt one woman and I thought I had her consent. She said it was fine. She said she liked it. She lied."
"How could you think she would like it?"
His eyes were cold. "Because many women do."
I felt as though he'd slapped me. "How?" I gasped. "How could someone like it?"
"You'd be surprised." He said dryly.
"But…it's just so degrading."
"That's societies influence on your mind talking, Olivia." Jace pushed himself up from the bed. "You don't know anything about it so don't pretend you do."
His back was to me now and he was walking away. He was walking away and my heart was pounding so hard in my chest it hurt. I felt as though it was moments away from being ripped from my flesh to pound against the immaculate marble of his floor. I couldn't let him walk away. I had to make a decision and before I knew it, I was speaking.
"I want it, Jace." He froze in place and his shoulders stiffened. "I want to be your submissive."
Chapter 4
There was no way I'd heard her right. Olivia wanted to be my submissive? She loathed that side of me. The side that craved dominance over another. Over everything. There was no way I heard her right. I had to be delusional. Maybe I was still slightly drunk from the night before. That would explain my suddenly overactive mind. There was just no way.
"What did you just say?" I felt my eyes narrow on her.
Her voice was quiet. She sounded unsure and self-conscious but her eyes were stubborn. "You heard me."
"Say it again."
"I want to be your submissive." She said strongly. Determinedly.
In two seconds flat, I closed the distance between us. I splayed my hand over her hip while the other wound around the back of her neck. I weaved my hand in her hair, pulling her head back, forcing her to look up at me. I didn't know what to feel in regards to her words. There was a part of me that was screaming for fucking joy. But, there was another part of me that was furious. Livid. Raging. How dare she want to subject herself to my wicked ways! She deserved so much more. She knew she deserved more. Surely she did? Damn it! I knew she deserved more.
"Why, Olivia?" I ground the words from between clenched teeth. In response, her body shuddered under my possessive touch.
Her eyes misted, but through the shine, I could see only steely determination. "I don't want to lose you."
Fuck. She thought she had to do this so she didn't lose me? Stupid woman! "You're not losing me, Olivia. I'm not going anywhere and neither are you."
"It's not just that." I could hear the tremors in her voice and I wanted to quell them. I needed to.
"What else is it?" I asked. I had to know.