So it caught him off guard when that word from Leiya’s mouth hurt.
“Is that what you think of me?”
“It is what they call you,” she said, pouting, but her eyes were wary. Hesitating. Afraid. Just like all the rest, after all.
“That is not what I asked.”
Faren realized that at some point, his voice had dropped low and dangerous, more like his tone when he addressed his warriors or spoke to his fellow generals. Leiya had retreated even more, now really cowering from him.
He should have known better.
“I…” the starlet began, but no more words came from her.
Probably for the best. They would have been fear-tainted words anyway. Faren had no use for them. He didn’t like it when people told him what they thought he wanted to hear. That was simply another form of lying. A pity. For a short while, he’d hoped she was better than that. A gesha wasn’t supposed to fear her fated, but in all honesty Faren hadn’t truly thought that could happen.
“You will understand,” he said, but even that came out sounding like a command.
He hadn’t really expected her to answer, but a very quiet voice said,
“You don’t talk to women much, do you?”
He did not. It was true. Most of the women he interacted with were members of his crew and his warriors. He thought of them as their positions first and women second, except for those times after a battle when he was looking for a companion.
“No,” he confirmed.
Leiya nodded slowly. Not entirely robbed of spirit then, at least.
“Can you at least tell me who you’re presumably protecting me from?” she asked.
Now Faren hesitated. Leiya’s father was Senator Tawren, and he was friends with the cursed Senator Primen. Until he was sure who he could trust and where Leiya’s father stood with everything, it was probably better she didn’t know any specifics.
“I have many enemies,” he chose to say.
It wasn’t even a lie. Judging from the look in Leiya’ eyes, she didn’t think it was either.#p#分页标题#e#
Faren wished he could somehow distinguish the eyes from the look. As the bond between them became more and more solid despite themselves, drawing them closer, it did nothing to mend what was already broken. The little starlet was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, with deep green eyes he had come to like.
Only the look in them was fearful at best and hateful at worst. She couldn’t stand him, couldn’t stand to be with him and in all likelihood, couldn’t bear the thought of being his. It was what Diego had warned him about. Isolde had relented, but for some reason Faren didn't see Leiya doing the same.
Faren was not surprised. He was a monster and it made sense for his fated to share that opinion along with everyone else.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Leiya
Oh well, that went great.
Leiya was wondering if all geshas went through the phase of feeling everything at once. She desperately wanted to talk to someone about it. For some strange reason, the person whose advice she would have taken most gladly was Isolde. The human gesha, but Leiya felt like she would understand her best. Because even if all geshas felt overwhelmed, Leiya sensed her emotions were different. Even being the Leiya-type girl that she was, Leiya wasn’t used to feeling so, so much. She was exhausted from her escape, angry, afraid, sad, and overall despairing all at once.
Am I not forgetting something?
Oh, yes. And horribly, unbelievably attracted to her gerion. Leiya didn’t even know where to begin with that. It would have been easy to say that her body had finally chosen to take a real interest in the opposite sex. And had of course chosen the worst possible moment to do so.
Oh look at me, she thought miserably. I’m the girl that thinks her gerion is hot. Poor, poor me. Somehow I don’t think they’ll sing sad songs of my fate for that.
In truth, she was madder at herself than she was at Faren. He was so far pretty much everything she had expected. From a gerion, and from him specifically.
No, it was with herself that Leiya had a problem with. She was acting all wrong. There were two easy solutions, but she dangled in between. She could have either accepted it like a proper Brion, or hated him like a spiteful gesha. Leiya... wanted to do both and it was infuriating.
That damn stupid bond, but those stormy eyes were doing things to her. She found herself desperately longing to see a fire burn in them, a fire just for her. Longed to see them flash for her and be held in those arms again. A part of her wanted to try fleeing once more, just to get to be caught. That thought alone was more humiliating for her than the entire conduct of the day had been.
What was wrong with her? She still hated warriors. Still feared Faren so much it made her head dizzy. She’d literally crawled into a corner from him, by gods. Was she a child running from a monster?
Well, that wasn’t too bad of a comparison, actually. Faren was a monster, and parents did scare their children with him.
And Leiya was to be bound for life to that man.
She hated herself for not entirely disliking the idea. Per-fect. She had always joked about Iloya and her love of warriors, saying that girls weren’t supposed to forgive guys everything just because they were ripped. And there she was. If the situation wasn’t so tragic, Leiya didn’t doubt Iloya would have had a good laugh at her expense.
It had been almost tolerable up until a minute ago. She’d been scared for Miren and then for her reputation as someone who opposed warriors, but not for herself. A gerion, even a warrior, would never hurt his gesha. Right? At least she didn’t know of any such cases. But if anyone, surely the Monster of Briolina?
It was only when Faren’s voice had suddenly taken on a dangerous edge that Leiya had noticed she was yelling at him and calling him names. At Faren.
She didn’t know how she was supposed to think of him. On the one hand, he was Faren, her gerion. Which meant – or was supposed to mean – that she was the last person he’d ever hurt. On the other hand, he was still Faren, the terrible, bloody Brion general. And he would continue to be both of those things.
All she knew was she didn’t want his eyes to look like they had a minute ago. Ever, ever again. Faren didn’t get mad, they’d always told her. He got cold. Leiya now knew that to be true. And somehow it was even worse. It was wholly, mind-numbingly eerie to see all emotion disappear from behind the general’s eyes. Like he was no longer a man, but truly… a monster.
Leiya looked at the screen on the wall, where the image of the Unbroken was growing larger. It was the simulation of the image she would have seen if there were real windows in the shuttle, but it was still terrifying. The ship looked as ruthless and cold as its master.#p#分页标题#e#
Beside her, the general stood in icy silence, saying nothing. Leiya shivered.
Into the lair of the beast, she thought.
She had to wonder if it was just her or if the Unbroken was the most inhospitable place she’d ever been to. So, fine, Leiya was used to bright places and bubbly personalities like her, and to people actually talking. This felt like one of the Brion tombs. Those were great, endlessly extending catacombs built for the Elders whose time had ran out even with all the technology they possessed. It was the proper Brion way to end one’s life.
They all did their service in the public part of their lives, and then they became Elders. It was their reward to rest in stasis-sleep most of the time and get to decide the fate of all Brions. And then, at the end of their lifespan, when their pods signaled their death, Brions were cremated and put to rest underground. There, everyone could read about their lives and see the remains of their selves. If they were feeling sentimental or just interested.
That was fine. Those Brions were already dead. Walking through the silent, cold, and terribly dark corridors of the Unbroken, Leiya couldn’t deny she was scared out of her mind. It definitely wasn’t just her, used to the light and noise. The Unbroken just really, truly was creepy. The darkness she’d expected, at least.
All Brion battle ships were kept dark so the valor squares could be seen better. It was a much faster and more practical means of communication than simply talking. Leiya was not a warrior and her eyes hadn’t developed to embrace darkness, so she was pretty much stumbling in complete darkness.
But the silence, the horrible feeling of everyone around her so quiet as to barely breathe… She had never thought she could fear anything so much. Every step felt like she could fall into a trap, which was ridiculous, but fears didn’t have to be rational. Once or twice she nearly ran into a crew member she had taken for a statue or a shadow. They all saluted Faren without any verbal greeting and went on with their duties.
This is the way my gerion likes to run things, Leiya thought. I won’t let him turn me into one of his mute statues.
The next warrior they met actually made Leiya scream out loud. The corridors in the warriors’ parts of the ship were even darker, almost completely without any light. She supposed Faren might have considered that to be another, continued form of constant training.
Leiya had never actually been on any of the Brion battle ships before. In fact, she had never left the surface of Briolina at all – but she’d heard they weren’t all like that. For example, Isolde, Diego Grothan’s gesha, was human. All Brions had a naturally good eyesight, but surely they made some changes for her. Still, it was almost impossible for Leiya to see anything until she practically walked into it.