“Whoa,” Alejandro said, stopping suddenly. “This is--”
“Crazy?” Rose supplied bitterly. “Nuts? Bizarre? Ab-freaking-normal?”
“Unexpected,” he said, putting his hands on her shoulders. “Is she in pain?”
“No. In fact, she acts kind of refreshed afterward,” Rose said, unhappily resigned to the fact that Alejandro would now never want to kiss the granddaughter of the crazy seer-witch from the nutjob family.
“Mom!” Sue rushed forward and reached out for Granny, and then seemed to realize she was still holding on to Connor’s potion. She tossed the vial at Connor.
And then all hell broke loose.
Events unfolded simultaneously, almost in slow motion, and Rose couldn’t do anything but watch in horror as Connor tripped and fell into Granny, knocking them both backward onto the couch. At the same time, Astrid leapt through the air, arms outstretched to catch the vial, and accidentally elbowing Sue, so they both fell down, all tangled arms and legs.
The vial, flying through the air end over end, hit the wall and bounced, and the lid popped off.
Rose moaned, clutching her head, as the potion arced through the air in a shining stream and landed right in Connor’s face.
Unfortunately, he was holding Bob at the time.
Granny’s shriek-moaning cut off mid-screech, and she turned blind eyes toward Alejandro, pointed one long finger at him, and drew herself up. “Your eldest child will rule in an isle of myth,” she intoned in a deep, scary tone that was nothing like her normal voice.
Then three things happened:
Granny fell back on the couch and started snoring—loudly.
Connor began to recite the ABCs—loudly.
And Bob started meowing. Also loudly.
“I don’t actually have any children,” Alejandro said, as if nothing out of the ordinary was going on. “Why is the cat making that noise?”
“It’s a sparkling conversation potion,” Rose said sadly, wondering where she could buy earplugs. “Takes weeks to wear off.”
“To have kids, you have to have sex first,” Astrid informed Alejandro. “Have you ever had sex? Do you want to have sex with my sister? She’s probably no good at it, since her last boyfriend was a long time ago, and he smelled funny.”
Rose sat down, right there on the floor, put her head in her hands, and started to laugh.
“I actually smell pretty good,” Alejandro said, and then he started to laugh, too. “You realize that none of this is going in my report, right?”
“I like him,” Sue said, grinning.
Rose wondered if there were any spells that could make her entire family disappear. “Abraca-freaking-dabra,” she muttered. “Welcome to my life.”
Dark and Deadly: Eight Bad Boys of Paranormal Romance by Jennifer Ashley, Alyssa Day, Felicity Heaton, Erin Kellison, Laurie London, Erin Quinn, Bonnie Vanak and Caris Roane
CHAPTER 7
An hour later, when everyone was finally gone and the house was finally quiet, Rose finished cleaning up spilled potion and then carefully discarded her rubber gloves. The last thing they needed was any more conversation, sparkling or otherwise. She could still hear Bob loudly expressing his displeasure somewhere out in the garden.
She sighed and poured herself a fresh cup of coffee, sat down at the kitchen table, and tried to mentally prepare herself to brew more potion when all she wanted to do was sleep.
She looked up, unable to suppress a twinge of hope, as Alejandro came back in from checking on Mac.
“No change,” he reported, shaking his head.
“I didn’t really expect there to be any. I’ll get started on the new batch in a minute. I just needed a caffeine break.” She sipped her coffee. “There’s more in the pot if you want any.”
He poured himself a cup and then joined her at the table and they sat in silence, drinking coffee, and to Rose’s surprise it wasn’t the least bit uncomfortable. It was almost . . . pleasant.
Something she could get used to. Waking up to Alejandro’s beautiful face; drinking coffee with him in her kitchen.
She caught herself before the fantasy carried her away. The last thing the gorgeous Agent Vasquez wanted or needed in his life was a moderately successful garden witch with a crazy family.
The last thing he needed . . . Rose suddenly put her coffee mug down with a thud. “What do you want?”
He blinked, and even his eyelashes were beautiful. It was so not fair.
“What do you mean? I want Mac to be back to human--”
She shook her head, determined not to let him distract her with important stuff. “No. I mean, what do you want? What is your deepest desire?”