My hand has a mind of its own as it rises up and brushes the hair off her face, lingering on her cheek. She leans her head into my palm. It makes me smile on the inside, even though I’m hurting for her.
“Are you sure you’re going to be okay?” I ask again. She just nods. I lean forward and place a soft kiss on her forehead. “Please call me if you need anything.”
“I will. Thanks,” she whispers. I reluctantly turn and walk towards the door. When I reach the door I turn to face her.
“Promise you’ll call if you need me, for anything.” A small smile graces her beautiful face.
“I promise,” she says. I’m still in two minds about leaving, but it’s what she wants.
“Lock up after I go,” I say before opening the door.
“I will.” As I reach for the door handle she adds, “Chase. Thanks again, for everything.”
“Anytime,” is all I say. Tonight has put things into perspective for me. It’s made me realise there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for her. Sure, I’ve been an arse the last few months, but that’s in the past. I honestly thought it was the best thing for both of us. I was wrong.
Tonight has made me see just how much I need her, and just how much she needs me. Tomorrow is going to be a new day for us. I’m going to do everything in my power to make her see just how special she is, and just how much she means to me.
••••
I swear I break every speed limit on the way home. The quicker I can get home and get Pops’ truck, the quicker I can be back to her place and keep watch. There’s no way I’ll be able to rest being on the other side of town, and so far away.
Honestly, I don’t think Benson would be stupid enough to go to her house tonight, but I need to be there just in case.
CHAPTER NINE
Angel
After Chase leaves I lock up, checking and double checking all the windows and doors. I also set the internal alarm. That’s something I’ve never done since living here, but tonight I feel I need to. It’s surprising how one event can totally change you. I feel like Riley robbed me of so many things tonight.
I wasn’t prepared to feel so scared and vulnerable once Chase left. In a way I wish I’d let him stay. Truth is, I needed some alone time. Time to sort through everything that’s happened tonight. Time to wrap my head around it all.
Once I’m positive all the locks are secure, I head to my bathroom. More than anything I need a shower. The overwhelming feeling I have to wash myself, wash the feel and smell of Riley off me, is consuming me. I’m not sure if it’ll help, but I need to do something. The smell of his sickening cologne lingers on my clothes, in my hair, on my skin. It’s making me feel sick in the stomach.
I go to the basin in my en-suite, removing the bandage Chase wrapped around my wrist. I get a shock when I look in the mirror and take in my appearance. I’m a mess. Great. Another thing to add to the things Chase witnessed tonight.
My external appearance is the least of my worries right now. It’s what I’m feeling on the inside that worries me. Chase did a pretty good job of distracting me from my thoughts while he was here. Now I’m alone, it’s all starting to resurface.
Before undressing, I walk towards the bathroom door, shutting and locking it. Something else I’ve never done.
I throw my jacket in the clothes hamper and slide my dress over my head. As I ball it up in my hands I notice the green grass stains over the back of the white dress. Memories of tonight, Riley chasing me, throwing me to the ground, pinning me down, all flash through my mind. Instead of throwing my dress in the hamper, I walk over to the bin next to the basin and drop it in. I then remove my underwear, doing the same.
Riley’s cologne is all over me. I can smell it. That smell is going to stick with me forever, I know it. I quickly go to the shower, turning the water on. I don’t even wait for it to heat up. The urgency to wash it all away is overpowering.
As I stand under the spray of the shower, letting the water cascade over me, the enormity of what happened hits me full force. I can’t feel the tears running down my cheeks because my face is positioned under the spray of the water, but I know they’re there. I feel dirty and violated.
I pump some body wash into my hand, rubbing it over every inch of my body. It doesn’t help. I pick up my exfoliating sponge and add some more body wash onto it. By the time I’m finished, my skin is tingling because it’s red raw. I can still feel his disgusting hands all over me, in me. How could I have been so wrong about a person?
Bile quickly rises, as images of him hovering over me destroy any confidence I was beginning to feel. I quickly get out of the shower and wrap myself in a towel as I run towards the toilet bowl, dropping to my knees.