After the Christmas Party(48)

“I’m not really hungry.”

Determined that he was somehow going to lighten her mood without letting her ruin his, he waggled his brows. “If you don’t want to open presents and you aren’t hungry, then whatever do we do to pass the time until we go to my mom’s house?”

Her gaze narrowed. “Not what you’re thinking.”

Yeah, her “Last night was a mistake” had clued him in that she wouldn’t be dangling any mistletoe over her head any time soon. He crossed his arms. “You don’t know what I’m thinking.”

“Sure, I do.”

“Then you should be ashamed of yourself.”

She didn’t crack a smile.

“Come on, Trinity. Lighten up. It’s Christmas and we’re young and healthy and have a lot of things to be thankful for. I’ve done my best to give you a special Christmas morning. Why are you acting this way?”

Trinity felt like a grade-A heel. She was being an ungrateful pain when he was doing his best to make the most of the morning. She realized that.

Just as she realized that she wanted to give in to his cajoling. But what would be the point?

Last night had blown her away then blown her to bits.

She was in love with him. Just look at how she’d fallen apart when she and Chase had ended. Chase had been nothing compared to Riley.

Nothing.

She’d given her word she’d go with him today, but beyond that she couldn’t do more. Couldn’t risk more.

He was a good man. He deserved more. Deserved better than she could ever be.

He deserved someone who could look around at the effort he’d made to make her Christmas morning special and express her appreciation, not clam up with fear and panic. Someone who could give him good things in return.

Casper mewed at her feet and she bent over to pick up the cat, stroking the silky fur.

“I fed her some tuna. Hope that’s okay and that I didn’t do something else wrong.”

Ouch. Usually he was so patient, but he must have reached his limit. She couldn’t fault him for that.

Walking over to the table where he’d prepared a small feast, she sat in a chair, putting Casper in her lap. The cat nuzzled her a brief moment then jumped down to rub against Riley’s leg. She didn’t blame her cat. She’d choose rubbing against Riley’s leg over her lap, too.

She and her cat could mope over him together when he was gone.

Her gaze fell on the brightly wrapped present next to her plate. “I don’t have your present with me.”

“You got me a present?”

Embarrassed, she nodded. “It’s not anything big. Just a little something that you will probably think silly.”

“Not a problem. We’ll go by your place on the way to my mother’s. I figure you will need to shower and change anyway.”

“Actually, I have a bag in my car and could grab a quick shower here if that’s okay.” Because if she went home, he might not prise her back outside the door to go to his mother’s. She might be a coward, but she wasn’t a liar. She’d told him she’d go, so she would go. If he still wanted her to. “I keep a change of clothes in my car because of never knowing when I’m going to get off work.”

“Whatever is fine. Can I get it for you?”

She shook her head. “Sit down. You’ve obviously worked hard this morning getting all this together. The least I can do is co-operate.”

She could tell he was disappointed. By her words and her actions.

She just wanted this day over.

“Will you please open your presents?”

Glancing at the package, she nodded. Really, how could she say no?

With shaky hands she unwrapped the present, her breath catching at what was inside. An angel tree-topper.

“Thank you.” She didn’t point out that she didn’t have a tree.

“You’re welcome.” He sounded as awkward as she did.

That the packages inside her stocking contained various Christmas ornaments didn’t surprise her. Not really. What an optimist he was.

Part of her knew she’d treasure the gifts always. Another part wondered if she’d ever be able to look at them without remembering that the day he’d given them to her had been the beginning of the end.

Apparently, he was going to fail at giving Trinity a magical day. Not that he wasn’t trying, but he could only do so much when she wouldn’t look him in the eye and even her smile was fake.

Maybe he should have just taken her home instead of torturing himself with failure for the remainder of the day.

He didn’t deal well with failure.

Especially when he didn’t know why he was failing. He loved this woman and wanted to make her day special. Why was everything coming out wrong?