After the Christmas Party(19)

Her stomach knotted. Was he playing some sick game with her? Teasing her? Toying with her emotions?

“I do, but…Trinity, tell me to go home.”

If this was his idea of a game, it was cruel and twisted. She wasn’t amused.

“Go home,” she ordered, and meant it. She’d been hurt enough in the past. She wouldn’t let someone sour her future. Not even someone who seemed as wonderful as Riley.

Then again, most of the time when something seemed too good to be true, it really was. So why was she still on the line, waiting for him to say something? Hoping he’d say something. Something brilliant and wonderful that would make her smile instead of feeling as if her eyes were about to spring a leak.

A low laugh sounded in her ears. “That was way too easy for you, princess.”

“You have no idea,” she muttered, wondering at the silence that followed. She wanted to tear the door off its hinges and drag him inside her apartment and demand he explain himself.

Instead, she leaned her forehead against the cold metal doorframe, wishing she could see through it to the other side, wishing she knew what he was thinking, why he was standing outside her door when she was inside, why he’d called her instead of knocking.

Why was he there at all?

Why wasn’t she hanging up?

Urgh. Her head hurt with all the questions plaguing her mind.

“If I knocked, would you let me in, princess?” His voice was barely above a whisper but she heard just fine.

Her hands shook. “I guess you’ll have to knock to know the answer to that question, won’t you, snowflake?”

Taking a deep breath, he laughed again. “If you had any idea how much I want to rip through this door because I know you’re standing just the other side…” He paused, and she’d swear she felt his forehead bump against the door. Was he trying to knock some sense into his head? How was it he kept putting her thoughts into words that came from his mouth?

“As much as I want you,” he admitted, “what I want more than anything is to not mess this up.”

“Knocking on my door would mess this up?” What was “this”, she wanted to ask, but held her tongue. She doubted he knew any more than she did. That he admitted there was a “this” was monumental, had her brain undoing every wall she’d just attempted to erect between them. Didn’t he know he should leave those walls alone? She needed them.

“It might. What if you didn’t open the door?”

He had a point.

“True, but what if I did?”

Or would that be messing things up even worse?

Riley ground his forehead against the cold, hard metal of Trinity’s apartment door and prayed for the knowledge to know the right thing to do.

He wanted to knock.

Whether she would admit to it or not, she wanted him to knock. He could hear it in her voice.

Every instinct warned he shouldn’t, that, despite their mutual desire for one another, she wasn’t ready to consummate that desire. Not really.

As much as he hated listening to that voice of reason, he trusted his instincts more than the body part that had him wanting to he-man his way into her apartment.

To do that would only satisfy him in the short term and although he had no clue exactly what he wanted with Trinity, he knew that one night would not be enough. If he rushed, she might shut him out for ever. Despite the tough front she attempted to put on, she was vulnerable in ways that made him want to fight every dragon that had ever taken a swipe at her. Although he didn’t understand or like how protective he felt about her, he refused to be yet another dragon for her to fend off, even if a well-intentioned one.

“We both know you shouldn’t open your door to me. Not tonight.” He straightened from the door before he gave in to temptation.

“Then why did you call?” She sounded irked, which pleased him because it meant she wasn’t immune to the chemistry between them. That he wasn’t wrong.

“Why call?” He loved her logic and her sass. Despite the rebellious throb in his body, he couldn’t help but smile. “To hear your voice. For you to tell me I’m crazy.”

“You’re crazy,” she replied, without hesitation.

“About you,” he admitted, knowing it was true, that she was different from any woman he’d ever known, and not just because she didn’t fall at his feet.

Which was why he’d leave, and smile while doing so. Yeah, he’d like to be on the other side of her door but there was no rush. He’d take his time, woo her, have her begging for more, and then give her more for however long the sparks between them flew.

“You don’t even know me,” she insisted, much as she’d done previously.