After the Christmas Party(156)
Or perhaps it was her other realization during the night that had her so defensive. She didn’t want to be in love with him.
“Riley, I don’t want to do this today.”
“This?”
“You know.”
He blinked and tugged at the covers again.
Holding them tight, she shook her head. “No.”
He let go of the comforter. “What are you saying?”
Her grip on the comforter tightened. “Last night shouldn’t have happened.”
“Because?”
What could she say? That she was so damaged by her past that she couldn’t bear any more pain? That she’d fallen in love with him and although she’d thought she was strong enough to be with him and survive when he got bored with her crazy hang-ups, last night had shown her otherwise?
“Fine,” he agreed between gritted teeth. “Last night was a mistake.”
She couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or angry.
“At least get out of bed and come and see what Santa left you.”
Her heart dropped somewhere to the pit of her stomach. “Please, don’t.”
Because she just couldn’t take such comments this morning. She just couldn’t pretend she was the same as him, that she could spend the night in his bed and go and be all jolly with his family. She couldn’t pretend that she didn’t love him and that she was terrified of that realization.
“Don’t?” He raked his fingers through his hair then scooted up beside her, gently forced her to look at him. “Talk to me, Trinity. I thought you’d wake up smiling this morning, not looking at me as if I’m the Grinch who stole Christmas.”
“No, that would be me. I’m the one who dislikes Christmas, remember?”
“That’s just because you’re so stubborn and refuse to give Christmas a chance. Quit being otherwise, get out of bed, and let’s enjoy our Christmas morning together before it’s time to leave for my mom’s. We’ll discuss last night some other time, but for now I promised you the best Christmas ever. Accomplishing that does require some effort on your part.”
A sick feeling settled in her stomach. “What have you done?”
Because She didn’t want him going and setting a precedent that every other year would have to live up to and never would. She didn’t want him being nice to her because he felt sorry for her that her mother just hadn’t been into Christmas. That Chase had messed with her head and heart. She didn’t want to be another of Riley’s charity cases.
“I didn’t say I did anything. But maybe you were a very good girl this year, and Santa came to see you last night.”
She didn’t want him making her depend on him even more than she already did. That was becoming more and more difficult each day and after last night…She shook her head. He probably thought her a charity case all the way round. Maybe that’s what the past few weeks had been about. She was this year’s Christmas project. “No, whatever it is you’ve done, just undo it.”
His jaw tightened. “You want me to undo your Christmas morning?”
She nodded. “I don’t want you being nice to me.”
“Now I’m really confused.”
“Don’t you see?” She fought sniffling. “You’ve got to stop doing this.”
His eyes filled with concern. “I don’t see at all. You’ve stumped me. What exactly do I have to stop doing?”
“Making me want to believe.”
He reached over, ran his finger across her face and tucked a hair behind her ear. “Now, why would I want you to stop believing when the whole idea is to make you believe in Christmas?”
Only she hadn’t been talking about Christmas.
She’d been referring to him.
CHAPTER TWELVE
RILEY SCRATCHED HIS head in total confusion while Trinity got out of the bed without his assistance and with the comforter wrapped around her delectable body. He’d have liked to have woken her up with kisses, but he hadn’t wanted her to get the wrong idea.
Which meant there was a right idea.
He wasn’t exactly sure what that was, but he figured he had some time to figure it out. To figure them out because he wasn’t a forever kind of man and she deserved her own happy-ever-after.
At least he’d thought he had time and had told himself he just wouldn’t think about the future today, that he’d focus on the holiday and giving Trinity a day to remember always.
He just didn’t understand why she’d be back to bah-humbugging after the night they’d shared. He’d thought the night amazing, had expected all smiles and happiness on his favorite day of the year. Instead, she’d seemed determined to be contrary. Did she want to ruin their day? To fight?