After All(62)

"Yeah. And that's the huge difference here. For one, no one is winning anyone over. Except for us, together, winning over the general public. For second, you actually liked Will."

"I still don't believe you don't like Emmett, even a little." I stare blankly at her. She shrugs with one shoulder. "Okay, so then at least you like his dick."

"I do. And I can like a dick without liking what it's attached to." I pause. "Though I must say, his tongue and his hands are pretty fantastic too. Wouldn't be fair to leave them out. So I guess if there was some version of Emmett out there that was just tongue, dick and hands, I'd venture to say then that, yes, I like him."


      ///
       
         
       
        

A silence falls over us as we ponder this interesting phallic creation.

"You know what, I know you," she says with a patient smile. "I know you and I know you say you hate him but you don't. Not even a bit. In fact, the only thing you hate is the fact that you like him. I'd go on to say that you probably like him a lot."

I scoff and busy myself with the napkin. "You don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, but I do. I do. All that time pretending I wasn't in love with Will was absolutely futile."

I glance at her in annoyance. "I'm not in love with Emmett."

"I'm not saying you are. But you like him and you're pretending you don't."

I swallow that down. "So?" I ask cagily.

"Love is a cliff. You're just steps from the edge. The fall is inevitable."

I let out a huff of air, blowing a strand of hair off my face. "You can like someone and not fall in love with them. It happens all the time. It's why so many people break up. They have the like. They want the love. And they expect the love. But sometimes that love doesn't show up. So you have to end it." I can't help but think about Emmett as I'm saying this, the way he was with his ex-fiancée.

"You're so cynical."

"I've been around the block a lot," I remind her. "And I'm not cynical, I'm a realist. I know what to expect, I know how it all works. The fact of the matter is the majority of relationships downright fail before they even get to the ‘I love you stage', let alone after. And when it comes to Emmett and me, our relationship is one hundred per cent fake."

"I bet the orgasms are real," she says under her breath.

"And they are. I like Emmett. Okay? And I like having sex with him. No, I love having sex with him. But that's the extent of what we are and who we are to each other. It will never go beyond that. It's not in the contract. There are no cliffs of love for us to leap off of here. Just one big wall, signed with ink."

Jackie studies me for a moment before shaking her head and taking a sip of her drink. "You're a dream crusher, you know that? What the hell are you doing reading all those romance novels anyway? Don't you believe in the happily ever after? Don't you want that?"

I suck back on my straw and grin at her. "Honestly, I just want to get off."

She bursts out laughing and raises her drink. "Well okay then. Congratu-fucking-lations to that!"

"Cheers," I say as I clink mine against hers.

"Oh, by the way," she says after our food arrives and I've started wolfing down my gnocchi. "I was thinking that since you guys are officially dating, maybe the four of us could go on a date. Like a mini-trip together." 

I take my time chewing before I swallow it down. "A mini-trip? That sounds serious. Do you think we're ready for that?"

She casts me a dry look. "Do you hear yourself? This isn't a real relationship, you said so yourself. Technically, you can't mess it up. You're already ready for anything."

Right. Fuck, it's hard to keep things straight. "Sure. A trip sounds fun." It would be the first time going away with Emmett but with Will and Jackie there, I think it could be doable. "Where, when?"

"Labour Day weekend is just around the corner. I was originally thinking Will's mother's campground in Tofino but she actually won't be there then. What about your mom?"

My mom. I'm immediately hit with a pang of guilt. Normally I'm driving over to Penticton once a month to visit her but Emmett's been sucking up so much of my time lately. The last thing I want is for her to meet Emmett and buy into the whole relationship thing, though I know she already knows about him. Then again, it would put her little heart at ease to at least think I'm in a serious relationship with a (mildly) respectable guy. At least a guy with money.