Addicted to You(56)
As the guys talked, I could feel Landon staring at me. The more he did, the more self-conscious I became.
“What?” I finally blurted.
“How did I miss this?”
“What are you talking about?”
He lifted an eyebrow as if to call my bluff. He was back on the Colby conversation.
“Walk with me?”
“Sure.” I stood and followed him around the crowd.
We made our way to the shoreline and he finally asked, “You like each other?”
I sighed, so not wanting to have this conversation. “Colby doesn’t like me as more than a friend.”
He raised an eyebrow as if to challenge my comment. “He’s told you that?”
“Well, no, but I just know he doesn’t.”
“How?”
How did I casually tell Landon Colby was pushing me to him? “Well, he’s suggested I date other people.”
He smirked and shook his head. “I should’ve known. I mean it was right there, but leave it to Colby to put someone else first, regardless of how he feels. Hell, that in itself should’ve been the giveaway right there.”
“You lost me. But really, let’s not have this conversation.”
He grinned. “I’ll drop it if you answer one more question.”
I huffed. “Which is?”
“How do you feel about Colby?”
I stared at my feet, sinking into the sand, as if they were the only thing grounding me in reality. Because really, was this conversation seriously happening? “I don’t know.”
“Come on, Isla. Between you and me. You like him?”
I snorted. Like him? “Understatement.” Oh god, did I say that last part out loud?
“Do you love him?”
My gaze shot up and I stared at Landon, but instead of judgment or amusement, I found his expression serious yet compassionate.
Tears pricked my eyes though I had no idea why.
“Hey, I won’t tell anyone. It’s okay.” He reached out and wiped the corner of one eye. “How long?”
The corner of my mouth quivered and I clamped it with my teeth, and shrugged.
He smiled. “He’s a lucky guy.”
“He doesn’t love me back.”
Admitting that aloud made my heart hurt. I’d kept all these stupid emotions bottled up for so long, all it took were the right questions asked by the right person and the truth shattered free. It had been easier to love Colby with the hope that one day he’d love me back. But loving him and knowing I’d never be that person to him—well, it wrecked me.
“Impossible.” Landon offered the sweetest of smiles. “I think Colby is just a little confused right now. Stuck in the middle. And it’s kind of my fault.”
In the middle. Exactly what Taylor had said. And a part of me could believe that, but the problem was that when it came to my feelings for Colby there was no middle. It was hard for me to understand. Granted my relationship with my brother was nonexistent. But Landon would never hate Colby for loving me. It wasn’t like either of us was trying to hurt anyone else. If Colby could let another guy have me, clearly his feelings weren’t what mine were.
“I’m not sure. I mean, he might be confused but, I don’t know, I just think if he loved me, like really loved me, I’d know because when it comes down to it, love’s not really a choice.”
The corner of his mouth lifted and he nodded. “You’re absolutely right. But you know, maybe he loves two people—in two very different ways, of course—and he doesn’t want to hurt either one. So he does what he thinks is best for both of them.”
“He’s what’s best for me,” I whispered.
“You’re absolutely right. So let’s help him figure that out.”
My head shot up. “You said you wouldn’t say anything to him.”
“And I won’t. But that doesn’t mean I can’t help him see things a little clearer.”
“I don’t know, Landon. I mean, what if we’re totally wrong here? Guys don’t always invest the same emotions into their actions as girls do. What if I really am nothing more than a drunken, meaningless hookup?”
His eyes widened.
“Oh shit.” I buried my face in my hands, took a deep breath, then peeked between my fingers to gauge his reaction.
“He’s my brother and my roommate. I know for a fact he doesn’t ‘hook up’ with girls.” He pulled my hands down but kept them wrapped in his. “And you of all people could never be meaningless. You have to know that.
“Come on. We came here to have fun. And I’m doing nothing but dragging you down.” As we made our way back toward the bonfire he added, “I’m really glad we talked tonight. I feel like an idiot for missing a whole lot of obvious but, you know, I think everything’s going to be okay.”