But this time, he stopped me. “Isla.”
I sighed. “What?”
“Could you…”
I stared at him, waiting for his question.
“I just…” He spoke slowly as if he needed me to hear each word with clarity. “Could you ever see Landon as…more than a friend?”
“Landon…Me?”
“Yeah.”
“But what about…what about us?”
“There’s really not an—”
I held my breath, waiting to hear the words that would give finality to what I feared.
His expression softened as he continued. “…An easy way to figure this all out. But I, um, I think he’s interested in more with you.”
“And you?”
“I think he’d treat you right.”
“I meant how do you feel about m—”
He looked down. “He deserves a fair chance.”
I ducked my head to make eye contact with him, searching for some kind of explanation behind what he was saying. “So you want me…and him? A chance…You want me to give him a chance?”
“You should do what’s best for you.”
I stepped closer, and his body tensed, but not in an angry or upset way, more like caution. Like he held back.
“Landon is a great guy, but I, uh, don’t see him in that way.”
His head popped up. “Could you?”
“I…I don’t know.” My mouth tugged down, not liking the direction this conversation had headed. This went back to the same question Felicity had asked. Could I? Who knew? I had never seen him in that way, but truth be told, as long as Colby was in the picture, I wouldn’t. “If…” I turned away and took a deep breath as my words trailed off.
“If what, Isla?”
I spun around, closed the distance between us, and kissed him. It wasn’t deep, nor was it timid. More of an invitation. I needed to know once and for all, tonight. If I put myself out there, took the decision out of his hands, would he pull away or take it to the next level?
And I got my answer.
His arms wrapped around my waist, holding me tightly against him. As my lips parted, his tongue sought the soft underside of my top lip and my breath came out in a shudder, recalling how he’d done that same thing the night we’d spent together. So I pulled back slightly, allowing room for my teeth to sink into his bottom lip, forcing him to react just as he had that night.
He took a step in the direction of his bed, but I moved in the opposite direction, ultimately pulling away. Not that I really wanted to, but I’d only initiated to prove a point. I couldn’t allow it to go further. Though I really wanted to.
“I needed to know this attraction wasn’t one-sided. But I also need to know that ending up here again”—I gestured to the bed—“has nothing to do with drinking.” I slipped out of his arms. “Honestly, I don’t know what you want me to do. And I guess we both have things to think about…to figure out.” I stepped outside his room then glanced back over my shoulder. “Just know that even if it’s not what I want to hear, I’d rather know the truth then be shuffled around.” And right now, the truth felt like Colby had hooked up with me because we’re friends, it was easy, it was comfortable, and there was an attraction. He’d do it again for all those same reasons. But when it came down to it, attraction wasn’t the same as feelings, and he didn’t like me in the way he believed Landon did. So Colby acted as a brother and a friend, and suggested Landon and I consider giving things a go.
“Isla—”
I truly hoped I was wrong, but it wasn’t the time for arguing things further. Instead I said, “Think. Sober up. We’ll talk later. But Colby, just know the choice is yours.”
He shook his head as if denying my words, but ultimately it always had been his decision. If he cared about me half as much as I did him, there’d be only one choice.
He remained quiet as I walked down the hall, and as I rounded the corner, I was thrown back into the party still in full swing. The last half hour had been like a time warp in an alternate universe compared to this. Everyone was laughing, drinking, and completely oblivious to my emotional turmoil, thank God.
“I win.” Brandon pointed at Dave. “Drink up.” He laughed, then asked, “Who’s next?”
He started rearranging the cups for the next game just as I came into view.
He grinned and I shook my head, so not ready to pretend I was okay.
“Oh, come on.” Brandon stared at me, slightly pleading.
I glanced at the table and shrugged, wavering slightly as all eyes went to me. “I don’t know.”