“Oh, I know,” he said, grinning at me. “Did she do the whole crossing and uncrossing of her legs? Give you a peek at the good stuff?”
“No!” I half-yelled. “What is wrong with you, Matt? She’s at least ten years younger than me.”
“So?” he asked. “It’s not like that’s uncommon. Most men dream of being with a younger woman.”
Ms. Wilde said that as well.
“Really?” I heard myself asking.
“Absolutely. You can’t tell me that you wouldn’t love to fuck the hell out of that naughty student of yours and show her who’s boss!”
I stopped dead in front of the lockers. The thought had never entered my mind before, but now that it was there, it sounded oddly…intriguing? And utterly ridiculous. Shaking my head, I stuffed my bag and clothes into the locker, slamming it shut.
“No,” I finally said. “Even if it wasn’t against the rules, she isn’t my type at all.”
“What does she look like?” Matt asked as we headed for the treadmills.
I shrugged. “She’s kind of small with dark hair and blue eyes. She’s probably around twenty-one. She’s the worst dresser I’ve ever seen and her makeup and hair are just…well, it looks like she’s celebrating Halloween year-round.”
Matt nodded and I could see that he was creating a visual in his head.
“Oh, and she has a tattoo below the nape of her neck,” I added.
“Hmm, tattoos are hot,” he said dreamily. “How are her tits?”
I clenched my jaw. Unfortunately, I knew exactly how her “tits” were, as Matt so charmingly put it.
“That good, huh?” He grinned.
“I don’t know,” I said, feeling tired of the conversation. “I wouldn’t know which criteria to judge them against.”
“They can’t be too small, but not too big either. A handful is perfect, and I do have pretty big hands,” he said with a laugh, holding them up in front of him and crudely mimicking fondling a pair of breasts.
I rolled my eyes, stepped onto the nearest treadmill, and started running. I didn’t want to think about Ms. Wilde’s breasts, and I hoped that Matt would drop the subject.
“Oh,” he said, after he’d finished his imaginary groping. “They have to be nice and perky. But that’s pretty much a given with a twenty-one-year-old, you lucky dog.”
They were perky, I couldn’t deny that. I ran faster.
“So, are you going to make a move on her?” Matt continued, despite my running at top speed and the fact that I hadn’t answered his asinine breast inquiries. He’d stepped onto the treadmill next to mine, but was barely strolling.
“Of course not,” I panted.
“Why not? The way you describe what she does in your class, it sounds like she’s into you.”
She is not into me. She’s…I don’t know what she is.
I kept running until it felt as if my heart was about to burst out of my chest and sweat was pouring off me. I stopped the treadmill and downed my water while Matt continued to watch me from the machine next to mine with a stupid grin on his face.
“What?” I snapped.
“Easy, bro, don’t give yourself an aneurysm,” he said and stopped his slow pace. “I’m just saying that if this girl can get you that worked up, there might be something there.”
“There’s nothing there,” I panted. “She’s stupid and annoying and frankly, I can’t wait for the semester to be over so I don’t have to look at her twice a week. And, yes, her breasts are very perky and probably just the right size, but that doesn’t change the fact that she looks like an extra from a Tim Burton movie and seems hell-bent on annoying the crap out of me!”
I stormed off and heard him laughing as he followed me to the weight room. I lay down on the bench press, hoping that Matt would keep his mouth shut while he spotted me. Of course, I was out of luck in that department.
“Sooo, when your class is over, it wouldn’t be illegal for you to date her, would it?”
I groaned with the exertion. “Since I have no interest in dating her, it’s a moot point. Besides, I’m much too old for her, and like I’ve already said, she’s not my type.”
“You like brunettes,” he countered.
“Yes, but I don’t like ghoul makeup, torn pantyhose, and especially not tattoos. Why are we still talking about this?”
“Because you’ve mentioned her every time I’ve seen you in the past two months,” he said.
I haven’t talked about her that much, have I?
“You don’t even realize that you’ve done that, do you?”