About That Kiss:A Heartbreaker Bay Novel(49)

OfAllTheGinJointsInAllTheTownsInAllTheWorld




One week later



Kylie carefully navigated her way out of the Uber in front of her place.  It wasn't easy with her bag and her crutches-she wasn't supposed to put  weight on her leg yet-but she managed because.

She needed to be alone.

Or more accurately, away from her mom.

They'd had a surprisingly and shockingly good time at the beach house.  Her mom had been sweet and attentive and helpful, all new traits. She'd  even cooked for Kylie. And they'd had to call the fire department only  one time and that had been mostly because her mom wanted to see if Aptos  had any cute new firefighter recruits, so she'd burned some cookies and  set off the fire alarm.

But it was time for Kylie to get back to her life. Her friends missed her. Gib missed her. Work missed her. Vinnie missed her.

She wanted to get back to normal. Or as normal as her life could be. To  say she still felt off balance about how everything had gone down would  be an understatement. The boat was still off limits due to the ongoing  investigation, so she had no idea what, if anything, had been recovered.  But as far as she knew, the penguin hadn't been found in the fire and  that was devastating. Still, now she knew she didn't need it to remember  her grandpa by.

Kevin, who'd not been injured beyond minor smoke inhalation, was  cooperating fully, and for that she was grateful. But it was far more  than the fire that had her spinning. It was her broken heart. She'd done  her best not to go there all week with her mom, but just walking up to  the front of her place was like ripping off the Band-Aid.

Memories flooded her as she walked inside. Joe, and all those times he'd  stood on this very porch right at her back, watching out for her. Joe,  gently nudging her inside and then up against the wall, where he not so  gently kissed the daylights out of her. Joe, tipping his head back and  laughing at something she said. God, she loved his laugh. Joe, buried  deep inside her, his hands on her face, eyes locked on hers, revealing  emotion that he never seemed to have the words for.

With a shuddery exhalation, she made her way through the living room.  When she heard something behind her, she turned to find Joe standing in  the doorway as if she'd conjured him up.

He was in his usual work gear, loaded for bear, clearly straight from  the job and appearing as if maybe he'd just walked off the cover of Guns  & Ammo.

He looked like the best thing she'd seen all week-not that she wanted  him to know it, so she steeled both herself and her heart. Clearly he'd  set some sort of security or alarm to alert himself to her arrival and  that should've infuriated her. But be still her beating heart . . . he  seemed to be holding something. "Is that a bag of Tina's muffins?" she  asked, trying to remain unmoved.

"Your mom said you hadn't been eating very much."

"You've been talking to my mom?"

He shrugged. "You weren't answering my calls or texts."

She let out a deep sigh. "What are you doing here, Joe?"

"I needed to see you." He hadn't moved from where he stood against the  opposite doorway. "I needed to see for myself that you were alright."

She spread her arms. "Almost good as new."

He gave a small smile. "It's really good to see you. I missed you, Kylie."

"I know."

He seemed surprised and she smiled. "I guess you don't know that you  actually aren't that hard to read once you let someone in, although your  expression when you look at me is usually mostly either bemused or  confused." She shook her head. "I was never sure what to make of that,  but the girls told me it's a look of love." She kept her gaze level on  his, daring him to disagree with her, but he didn't.         

     



 

This gave her a surge of hope that her poor body didn't know what to do  with. So she mixed it in with her lingering anger and it was like a  chemistry experiment. It exploded inside her. "I'd take heart over that  except then you go and do stupid things like that night at my place when  everything came to a head. You made me so angry when you lied to me,  telling me you'd let me be involved-No," she said when he opened his  mouth. "You lied, Joe, by omission or whatever. Don't even try to deny  it. And that's not even the worst part. You sleep with me, and it's not  just sex. You touch me and kiss me and look at me in a way that tells me  it's so much more, but you deny it. You want me to think it's just a  toss in the hay that you could walk away from at any point. But it's  not." She had to stop there and swallow a ball of emotion stuck in her  throat. "And that's not something you do to a friend," she managed to  say, although she was no longer speaking all calm and quiet. "That's  something you do to a one-night stand. And I won't be someone that you  don't have the decency to tell the truth to, or someone you just sleep  with when it's convenient. I won't be a toy, Joe. Not even for you."

He finally pushed off from the doorway and stalked toward her, eyes  glittering dangerously. "You're not a toy, Kylie," he said in a very  serious voice. Maybe the most serious voice she'd heard from him yet.  "Not even close." He came to a stop right in front of her. He set the  bag of muffins aside and drew a deep breath. "With the exception of my  dad and my sister, I've always been alone-" He set a finger over her  lips when she started to speak. "I've never done relationships," he  said. "I've never lived with a woman. I've never gotten attached to  anyone because it's easier to keep them all distant than to let them in  and be vulnerable because of how I feel about them. It's not right, but  it's been my MO for a long time, and it's what makes me do things like  let you think I don't love you."

She sucked in a breath to speak, but he applied a gentle pressure to her  lips. "It's what made me screw up that night we were going after  Kevin," he went on. "I realized it and came back for you, but you were  already gone." He paused and shook his head. "Okay, that's not entirely  true either. Molly made me realize it and she was right. You're a part  of me, Kylie, the very best part. You're not just my friend or my lover.  You're . . . everything."

This shocking admission had all the air in her lungs escaping out in one  big, shocked rush, and she pulled his finger from her lips. "I have a  question," she whispered.

He gave a single, wary nod.

"Why did you ever agree to help me that first day, when I got the first picture?"

At first he didn't respond, but she forced herself to wait him out. She  might not be well versed in interrogation techniques, but she knew the  only way to get a stubborn male to answer a question when he didn't want  to was to ask it and then remain silent. But it was the hardest thing  she'd ever done and she had to literally bite her tongue to press her  minuscule advantage.

"I don't think I should say," Joe finally told her.

She gaped at him. "What? Why not?"

"Because I don't make a habit of giving my adversary information that can be used against me."

"Adversary?" she asked. "Is that how you see me?"

"Kylie," he said on a rough laugh. "We've been in a chess game since day  one and you're winning. When I'm not looking, you sneak pieces on your  side of the board. You don't need any help from me."

She stared at him and then found her first genuine smile in days. "You  missed me," she whispered, the knowledge giving her way too much smug  pleasure. "I think I want to hear you say it."

He was silent as he carefully scooped her up and gently deposited her on  the couch. She was grateful as her muscles were quivering with fatigue.  She watched from her perch as he locked her front door and checked the  house.         

     



 

When he came back to her, he sat on the coffee table facing her, mood still serious. "Yes."

"Yes?" she inquired.

"Yes, I missed you. I missed the hell out of you. I missed us. This," he said, gesturing between them.

"So there's really a this?" she asked softly, almost afraid to talk, scared that if she did, he'd stop.

He leaned forward and once again scooped her into his warm, strong,  wonderful arms. He took the spot where she'd just been, settling her in  his lap. "Long before our first kiss that first crazy night, I knew  there was a this." He nuzzled at her ear. "It terrified me. I was in  some pretty good denial there for a while, but I couldn't hold on to  it." He pulled back and met her gaze. "You trusted me. You looked at me  like I was something of worth to you. You believed in me, and there  haven't been a lot of people in my life to do that." Leaning in, he  covered her mouth with his.

It was a really amazing kiss and she was trying to climb him like a tree  when he broke free. Her heart stopped at the look on his face. "What?"  she whispered.