In turn, the choice of men to date is limited for a fat woman like me. I’ve dated since my freshman year of high school and had a couple of semi-serious relationships over the years. I guarantee if I had been skinny, I’d have dated a lot more.
I spent four years in college and three years in graduate school to be a clinical psychologist. In addition to classes, I had internships, a job, and a thesis to write. I didn’t have time to date (At least that’s what I told myself. The truth is no one asked).
One day, I woke up and realized almost all my friends had gotten married, were engaged to be married, or were in serious relationships. I hadn’t been on a date in two years. Other than an occasional movie, bingo, or karaoke with my BFF, Missy, my social life consisted of attending bridal showers, bachelorette parties, and weddings. For a while, I clung to the misconception my time was right around the corner.
When my brother got married, I snapped. He wasn’t even searching for his soul mate. He didn’t care if he ever got married. Why should he get his happy ever after and not me?
There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. My sorry tale of woe. Today, I’m ready to find my own happy ever after! Join me on my journey as I follow the yellow brick road. Just remember to buckle your seatbelt, because I have a feeling it’s going to be a bumpy ride!
CHAPTER 5
MARCH 8, 2012
DETROIT, MICHIGAN
WEIGHT: 183 LBS.
STATUS: SINGLE
Over the next week, I didn’t receive any more emails from Goldman, although I did get hundreds of emails from men from all over the country. I narrowed the field to those who lived in Michigan. That left me with eighty. Out of those eighty, not one of them met my criteria of a soul mate.
Perhaps, the idea of getting married within a year intimidated reasonably sane men.
Between work and shopping with Missy for more colorful clothing, the days flew by. Every day, I begged Missy to let me out of my agreement, swearing I’d complete it once I lost another thirty pounds. She wouldn’t relent, demanding I not give up too soon or let a few pounds get in the way of finding true love.
When another dateless Saturday night rolled around, I resigned myself to my typical night of staying in to watch reruns and eating a batch of homemade cookies.
Bored by nine o’clock, I decided to read over the profiles again, this time without such a critical eye. Maybe I became more desperate over the last week, but suddenly, I realized there were a lot of intriguing men to be found on this website. Yes, some of them couldn’t spell or write a sentence to save their life, but the majority simply wanted what I did. To find someone to ease the loneliness.
I made a list of potential men in order of preference. Then I emailed the top five. Within two hours, I had three responses. Apparently, I wasn’t the only one dateless tonight. I spent the rest of the night scheduling dates for the week.
I’d meet Jacob on Monday for a drink at eight, Larry on Wednesday for coffee at five, and Steven on Friday night for dinner. I would have preferred to limit the first date to a drink for an easy getaway, but Steven insisted on dinner at one of the nicest restaurants in the area.
I texted Missy to let her know I had three dates lined up for the week. Out on her fourth date with a girl named Megan, I tried to ascertain whether she could be “the one,” but Missy was unusually tight-lipped about her.
I didn’t expect a response since Missy’s rules allow for sex on the fourth date. She surprised me by responding with a happy face. I followed up by asking if she was on her date and again, she sent me a happy face. I let her get back to it as I contemplated emailing Goldman.
For some reason, I really wanted him to know about my success this evening. I debated back and forth on whether he would even care. In the end, I sent a short note he couldn’t read too much into.
Dear Goldman,
Guess who has three dates lined up for this week? I’ll give you a hint. She’s a fabulous swimmer, but requires advice when diving. Did you guess? Yes, it’s me. Have you met any possible future Mrs. Goldmans recently?
Your Comrade in Singledom,
Sara
Apparently, either he wasn’t on a date or he was rude enough to write me back in front of her, because a few minutes after I sent the email, I received his reply.
Dear Sara,
My diving advice to you is not to become too excited every time you get a date. Otherwise, you’ll exert too much energy on men who don’t deserve it. Enjoy every day, regardless of whether you have a date, and the rest will follow.
Your Comrade in Singledom,
Adam
P.S. Every woman is the possible Mrs. Goldman.
For such a jerk, he certainly gave some good advice. I would try and listen to it, but it wouldn’t be easy to stay relaxed, knowing I may have just taken the first step in meeting my future husband.