“And what's it been like?”
“Not going to lie, it's been hard, I've had to struggle a lot more than I thought but I wouldn't have changed one minute of it. I've been so free and been able to do whatever I want when I want, and there's nothing that's better. And you'll feel the same too once you start enjoying yourself properly. I'll show you the way to live, so drink up!” she said, finishing her glass and prompting me to do the same. I looked at mine and then at her, and to please her I swallowed everything. I let out a small burp and laughed. My head was swimming and I felt the first flush of intoxication. Ivy went to the bar and got us two more and then pulled her seat beside me, so close that our legs were touching. My breath caught in my throat as she leaned forward and turned her voice into a breathy whisper.
“I'm so glad you turned up tonight. It's good to see an old friend.” Her liquid eyes stared at me and I could see some pain inside them. I would never have agreed with her that we were old friends but I was hardly going to refute the assertion, but up until that day we had never really had a proper conversation.
“What's wrong?” I asked. Her eyes flickered and it looked like she was about to tell me when there was a flurry of noise entering the bar as a group of people came in. When they saw us they called out Ivy's name, and she rose and hugged them warmly. I felt isolated and left out.
Chapter 6
I continued to sit as Ivy walked through the crowd of people and greet them until she got to one girl. The tension was evident between them and they exchanged an awkward greeting before they went in opposite directions. Ivy came back to sit with me.
“Who's this?” one of the girls said. She was clad in black clothes, had bright red lipstick on, and was covered in tattoos.
“I'm Selina. I come from the same place as Ivy,” I said. Ivy's attention was still on the girl at the bar, and my mind was alive with various thoughts.
“Oh how exciting! Ivy never tells us about her past, tell me some secrets!” she pleaded. I looked at Ivy but she was still distracted.
“Oh, I don't know, I don't really have any, it was just a quiet town and not much happened there.” At that point Ivy rose and went to speak to the girl at the bar again. I looked over to them.
“Who is that?” I asked.
“Don't even go there. Those two are, god, when they're good they're great but too often they're terrible. Both of them are as bad as each other. They need a good girl to straighten them out but when they get together they just bring each other down. Both of them know it too. Brie is the one that's trying to remain strong and resist but Ivy isn't making it easy.
“Oh,” I said in a small voice. I wanted this night to be about me and Ivy but it was quickly turning into something else.
“You like her, don't you?” the tattooed woman said. I squirmed in my seat but I knew there was no point in denying it. I'd been denying it to everyone else for so long as well that it was nice to admit it to someone.
“I'd tell you to do yourself a favor and go after someone who is better for you, but I know that's not going to do any good. Ivy has a way of getting under your skin. We all call her poison Ivy. She hates it, but it's accurate.” She had a lilt to her voice that suggested she had suffered from the same affliction as I, and we sisters-in-arms raised our glasses to each other.
“I don't know if anything is going to happen, but I've liked her for as long as I can remember and I never...the place we grew up in was very traditional so I never got a chance to be myself, if you know what I mean.”
“I do, but you don't have that excuse anymore. If you want something to happen with her then you're going to have to tell her, but just go careful, she'll tell you she doesn't believe in love but there's no doubt in my mind, she loves Brie. Don't let her take advantage of you.”
“I won't,” I said. The woman left to go back to her friends, but not before squeezing my shoulder. I appreciated the gesture and I had never felt as unsure as I did in that moment. I was just a small girl in a world of complicated emotions that I didn't understand, and when I glanced at Ivy, who was returning to my table, I knew that it wasn't going to get any simpler anytime soon.
“Let's go outside,” she said, clasping my hand and not giving me any choice in the matter. We walked up a narrow staircase and then out onto the roof. There were a few other people there but they were all lost in their own worlds. We walked to the edge of the building.
“It's beautiful, isn't it?” Ivy said as she looked across at the sea of glittering lights. All I could think about were all the lives being lived at that moment, and we were just two small parts of the universe, yet we held within us such power to affect each others' lives. The night was cool and the air was warm. Ivy lit a cigarette. The end glowed orange as she placed it in between her lips. A plume of smoke was forced from her lips and it wafted into the air, becoming nothing. She offered me one but I declined.