My throat was thick as he left. Then I heard them go downstairs and drive away. “Fuck.”
*
Austin left to ear with them, and I didn’t want to sit alone with my emotions so I went swimming; fortunately our school’s pool had late hours. As I dove into the depths, I ducked my head down and swam.
I hadn’t thought about swimming in a long time, but when everyone left I needed to do something. I couldn’t steal anymore. I was good at swimming. The water absorbed me, taking me away from the world, until it was only me. It was me, the water, and my thoughts.
Lining my feet against the wall, I held myself there and stared at the end. The water rippled, as if daring me to go faster and plunge through it, and I was itching to answer its challenge. I felt the excitement building inside, and shoved off from the end. My arms were already circling when I ducked my head down and kicked out.
I started out limber, going slow to get into a good pace, but I knew what would happen. I would use every muscle in my body. My lungs would strain, stretching to their fullest capacity, before I turned and took a relieving breath. I would suck air in, and my head would go back down. Each kick would match each stroke and I would take myself to the end only to duck down and repeat the process.
This was the warmup when it was fun and freeing, but soon, I would hit a wall of fatigue. That’s when those muscles would protest. My lungs would scream for relief. Every cell in my body would want me to quit, but I wouldn’t. I never did. An hour later, then another thirty minutes after that, I kept going. I didn’t stop. I pushed through the pain until my mind screamed, ‘enough.’ It was then I went to the end of the lane and stopped. My fingers clutched the edge and I panted. I had reached the point where my brain stopped working. All thoughts had fled and the emotions had been cleared from me.
Swimming was pure.
I had missed it. I had needed it.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
It was in our first class when I saw the reunion of Mandy with Amber. Since the Jennica debacle, Amber had sided with her, but my sister was whispering with Amber in the back of the classroom. My eyebrow went up and I grunted, then sat and turned my back to them. I had tried to help my sister out enough.
“Morning, class.” The teacher shut the door and put her bag on the desk. She lifted up a novel, Of Mice and Men. “Who read the chapters? I want to know your thoughts.”
I snuck a peek at Mandy and Amber. Talk about friendship and sacrifice. Then I smirked when Amber raised her hand. “Mrs. Tationa, Mandy and I were wondering if we could be excused. We’d like to finish up some posters before the pep rally this week.”
“Oh, Amber, of course—”
I burst out, “Are you kidding me?!”
“Taryn,” Mandy hissed.
The teacher looked startled. “You don’t agree with my decisions in this classroom, Miss Matthews?”
I shot my sister a glare, but turned to Amber. “You’re not even on the pep rally committee. Trust me, I know. I live with the president of the pep rally committee. Two, you’re not a cheerleader, and three, if anyone should benefit from this discussion—it’s you!”
A strangled gasp ripped from Mandy. “Shut. Up.” She gritted her teeth.
“No,” I ignored her. “I’m sick of you guys running around this school like it’s your personal playground. All the teachers just let you guys get away with whatever you want. I’m so tired of it.”
Someone snorted behind me. “Aren’t you being hypocritical?”
A guy wearing a polo was glaring at me. I snapped, “What?”
“You’re one of them.” He leaned forward. “Have you ever been in trouble for anything?” I laughed at that and then heard him say, “Aren’t you dating Tray Evans?”
My grin fell flat. “No.”
Amber scoffed. “Then what were you doing Friday night in your bed?”
“We’re not dating.” We weren’t, but I held tight to my desk so I wouldn’t squirm all over.
“Whatever,” Amber shot back. “You get on your high horse about us, but we haven't done half the shit that you have.”
I went livid. My eyes narrowed. “Excuse me?”
“Like it was just ‘by chance’,” air quotes, “that the Monday after Mandy and Devon break up, our school gets canceled. That stuff’s never happened here before, and I’m sure you had nothing to do with it.” She rolled her eyes. “And we all know how Pedlam got broken into.”
Mandy paled. “Amber, stop it.”
My eyes narrowed to slits. “You’ve got balls, Amber.”
She frowned, and I saw the confusion on her face.