“Does this mean you will see him again?”
“Well, I’m not going to avoid making a friend because I’m suddenly worried about gossip. The Hiltys have just moved here and they need to feel welcome. We’re going to be their friends.”
“All right. But just make sure you let that man know that your heart belongs to your husband.”
That stung. And to her surprise and dismay, the pain settled in and grew. Her mother was right. Her heart would always belong to Sanford. Ever since he’d died, she’d been doing her best to honor his memory.
But she couldn’t help feeling that she’d been a little forgotten in the effort to preserve Sanford’s memory. What about how she felt? What about her pain? Her loneliness? Sometimes it felt as though her in-laws and parents would never see her as anything more than Sanford’s widow.
Didn’t she matter anymore?
“I don’t need reminders about what is in my heart,” she blurted.
“Of course not.”
“I’m the one who lost a husband. I don’t need you reminding me about that.”
“I’m sorry if you thought I was inferring.”
“You were. I also know what you were inferring. For some reason, you both came over here to make sure I did nothing to ruin Sanford’s place in my life.”
Rachel’s eyes filled with tears. “I’m not sure why you are reacting like this.”
“Rachel, I know you care about me, and I am mighty grateful for that. But it isn’t fair for you and Mamm to think you need to remind me about how I should be feeling. Or what I have lost. If I want to befriend a man who I have much in common with, you need to let me do that. Both of you do.”
Her mother looked on the verge of arguing, but to Emma’s surprise, Rachel cut her off. “You are right, dear,” she said in her sweet way. “I’m so sorry if you thought we came over here to judge. I didn’t mean to. You have every right to keep making friends. You have every right to be yourself. I promise, both your mother and I only want you to be happy.”
“Is that true, Mamm?” Emma asked.
“Of course, Emma. Rachel is right. We might have overstepped ourselves today. Maybe.”
But Emma knew that her mother was only backing down because Rachel looked on the verge of pulling her out of the room if she didn’t.
It was time to make amends. The three of them had been through too much together to dwell on disagreements. “Would you two ladies like to have some tea or kaffi and help me make three little girls dresses?”
Rachel opened her purse and pulled out her glasses. “You cut, I’ll pin.”
“And I’ll sew on your treadle,” her mother announced. “Why, with our help, I bet you can have them done by the time the girls come home from school.”
“That would be wunderbaar, Mamm,” Emma said quietly. When her mother’s expression softened, she knew that her mother understood that she was talking about so much more than just the sewing project.
Emma hoped they’d feel the same way tomorrow, too.
Chapter 8
Are you sure Emma won’t mind if we stop by today?” Jay asked William as they walked up the steps to the Keims’ front door.
“She ain’t going to mind at all. When I saw Miss Emma at school yesterday morning, she said I could stop by anytime. This is anytime, ain’t so?”
It was comments like that that made Jay think the Lord had a sense of humor. Headstrong, eternally optimistic, and constantly in motion, his youngest was as different from his two older brothers as could be. He wasn’t sure how he would have gotten through each day without William’s quips and comments. “Perhaps, but sometimes people say things they don’t mean,” he cautioned.
“Oh, she meant what she said, I’m sure of it. Lena said her mamm loves visitors.”
“All right. I guess we’ll see if she likes unannounced visitors.” Rapping his knuckles on the door, he said, “Don’t forget your manners, Will.”
“I won’t. But Daed, you don’t have to have gut manners with Lena’s mamm. You just have to be yourself.”
“That may be true, but still, I’d like you to be your best self,” he said just as Lena opened the door with a smile.
“Hi, Mr. Jay,” she chirped as she bounded out onto the porch. Her pink dress was a little on the short side, showing off her tan lower calves and bare feet. “Frankie and I were watching you out the window.”
She looked so proud of that fact, Jay realized she was expecting a response. “You were? I didn’t see you there.”
“I was there. We didn’t know if you were ever gonna knock. I wanted to open the door right away but Mamm said I had to wait until you knocked before opening it up. What took you so long?”