“Do you mind if I stop by Evan’s before I head home?” Jason quizzed Ming as he escorted her to where she’d left her car. “I’ll feel better if I see that he’s all right.”
“Sure.”
“Just let yourself in. I shouldn’t be more than fifteen minutes behind you.”
But when he got to his brother’s house, he discovered why Evan hadn’t made it to the wedding and hadn’t called him back. His brother was lying unconscious on his living room floor while an infomercial played on the television.
An open bottle of pain pills was tipped over on the coffee table. Empty. In a flash Jason became a fifteen-year-old again, finding his father passed out in the running car, the garage filled with exhaust. With a low cry, Jason dropped to his knees beside his brother. The steady rise and fall of Evan’s chest reassured Jason that his brother wasn’t dead. Sweat broke out as he grabbed his brother’s shoulder and shook.
“Evan. Damn it. Wake up.” His throat locked up as he searched for some sign that his brother was near consciousness. Darkness closed over his vision. He was back in the shadow-filled garage, where poisonous fumes had raked his throat and filled his lungs. His chest tightened with the need to cough. His brother couldn’t die. He had to wake him. With both hands on Evan’s shoulders, Jason shook him hard. “Evan.”
A hand shoved him in the chest, breaking through the walls of panic that had closed in on Jason.
“Geez, Jason.” His brother blinked in groggy confusion. “What the hell?”
Chest tight, Jason sat on the floor and raked his fingers through his hair. Relief hadn’t hit him yet. He couldn’t draw a full breath. Oxygen deprivation made his head spin. He dug the heels of his palms against his eyes and felt moisture.
Grabbing the pill bottle, he shook it in his brother’s face. “How many of these did you take?”
“Two. That’s all I had.”
And if there had been more? Would he have taken them? “Are you sure?”
Evan batted away his brother’s hand. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
“You didn’t make the wedding. So I came over to check on you. Then I saw you on the floor and I thought…” He couldn’t finish the thought.
“I didn’t make the wedding because I wasn’t in the mood.”
“And these?”
“I went for a bicycle ride this morning to clear my head and took a spill that messed up my back. That’s why I’m lying on the floor. I seized up.”
“I left three messages.” Jason’s hands trembled in the aftermath of the adrenaline rush. “Why didn’t you call me back?”
“I turned my phone off. I didn’t want to talk to anyone.” Evan rolled to his side and pushed into a sitting position. “What are you doing here?”
“Lily said she turned down your proposal. I thought maybe you’d done something stupid.”
But Evan wasn’t listening. He sucked in a ragged breath. “She’s afraid it’ll hurt her sister if we get married.” He blinked three times in rapid succession. “And she wouldn’t listen to me when I said Ming wouldn’t be as upset as Lily thinks.”
Jason couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Was this Evan’s way of convincing himself he wasn’t the bad guy in this scenario? “How do you figure? It’s only been six months since your engagement ended.”
Evan got to his feet, and Jason glimpsed frustration in his brother’s painful movements. “I know you think I messed up, but I did us both a favor.”
“How do you figure?” Jason stood as well, his earlier worry lost in a blast of righteous irritation.
“She wasn’t as much in love with me as you think she was.”
Jason couldn’t believe his brother was trying to shift some of the blame for their breakup onto Ming. “You forget who you’re talking to. I know Ming. I saw how happy she was with you.”
“Yeah, well. Not as happy as she could have been.”
“And whose fault was that?” He spun away from Evan and caught his reflection in the large living room windows. He looked hollow. As if the emotion of a moment before had emptied him of all energy.
“I worked hard at the relationship,” he said, his voice dull.
“And Ming didn’t?”
A long silence followed his question. When Jason turned around, his brother was sitting on the couch, his head in his hands.
“Ming and I were a mistake. I know that now. It’s Lily I love.” He lifted his head. His eyes were bleak. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to live without her.”