“I’ve been better; just tired, Mrs. Washington.”
“You saw part of the ladies’ routine. What do you think?”
“It was excellent.”
“They’ll be ready for the game by Thursday, Dr. Polaris.” She turned and saw Brandi walking back into the gym. “Miss Miles?”
“I need to talk to Dr. Polaris.”
He nodded, “It’s okay.”
Both watched Mrs. Washington leave the room before facing one another. Brandi looked down at her red and white clad feet. “I’m so sorry about the other day. I was rude to you for no reason. Forgiven?”
“I forgave you the second you said it.”
“I appreciate that. It’s been really hard for me with Eric always in my face. Hiding how I feel about you is worse, though.”
“It’ll work out, Brandi. Trust me.”
“How? Everything seems so impossible.”
“Right now, I can’t say how it will work itself out, but it will. I actually hadn’t planned to come in here today.”
“Didn’t you want to see our routine?”
No! “Sure, but I knew I would see it at the game. I couldn’t work because I was tired, but something is on my mind and I need to clear it with you.”
“With me? Why?”
“I was out of place complimenting you the other day. I was out of place to assume anything about Eric.”
“You were right on target. Screw him. But why do you feel you were out of place complimenting me? I liked it, even if I neglected to tell you.”
“You did everything right. You weren’t supposed to take kindly to me telling you how great you looked. I didn’t tell the other ladies how good they looked.”
“Did I do something lately to make you feel bad about me, other than the car wash thing?”
“Brandi, the point is that we are student and professor, and I feel that I’m crossing the line with you a lot.”
“What do you mean?”
He leaned against the bleachers, his head tilted back in frustration. “Look, all I’m saying is that we need to keep this professional. I’ve been getting a little too close, giving you extra notes when I haven’t given anyone else any, taking you home after Eric ditched you…”
“Would you have left me in that restaurant?”
“Of course not, but I should have let your father pick you up.”
She dropped her pom-poms to the floor, staring at him as if he were crazy. “Tim, what’s going on with you?”
“All I know is that sitting in that car with you the other day gave me ideas that I should not be having now that you’re my student. I know how we feel about one another, and it can’t work, Brandi. It can’t work for many reasons.”
“Tim, I’m not trying to have another fling with you. I told you that wouldn’t happen.”
“I know you did, but all I’m saying is that we really need to be more careful. Eric knows that I didn’t leave you in that restaurant. Who knows what he might be saying to everyone.”
“He hasn’t said anything, Tim.”
“That’s another thing, maybe it’s not a good idea to call me that.”
“I can’t call you by your name now?”
“It could make our relationship harder to let go if we’re personal with one another.”
“You can’t be serious! No one’s here; no one can hear us.”
“We don’t know that, and I think I need to go back to calling you Miss Miles.”
“Miss Miles? Is it like that now?”
“It has to be.”
“I don’t believe this. I’m acting as professional as I can around you, and it still is not working for you.”
“It’s just that I’m scared. I love my job here. I can’t see myself without this job. I’ve worked too hard to lose it now.”
“I would not be the reason for you losing your job, Tim, sorry, Dr. Polaris. I want my scholarship as badly as you want this job. Why would I jeopardize anything?”
“All I’m saying is that we should not be seen together other than for tutoring.”
“Then what about the seminar this weekend? Is that off, too? I would hate to know that I took this weekend off from the bookstore for nothing. Besides, now that I know about it, I really want to go and hear those lectures.”
“No, that’s still on. I said I will.”
“I can take myself up there. My car is not working well, but I can chance it.”
“No, I won’t go back on my word. Besides, you need to hear the lectures. I’m the reason you know about them, anyway.”
Her eyes gazed into his with disbelief. “How can I not call you Tim when I’m so used to it?”
He wiped the perspiration off his forehead. “Fine, call me Tim, but don’t ever slip in front of anyone, especially Eric. That’s all the fuel he needs.”
“Don’t be afraid of Eric.”
“I’m not scared of him! It’s…it’s just that he could cause trouble and you know it.”
“It won’t be a first for him.”
“I know that.”
Suddenly her body felt so tired, doing something as simple as retrieving the pom-poms at her feet was an effort. This was all too much for Tim to put on her, though she believed she knew his reasons. Her little display in front of him with the towels drew a few looks, namely, Dr. Moore, though she hoped he had been looking in their direction for other reasons. Yes, she knew Tim was scared, and with good cause. She had to respect how he felt and watch her own butt around him.
“I guess that’s that, isn’t it?”
“I don’t mean to hurt you, Miss Mi…”
“You can call me Brandi. No one is here, Tim, and I know you don’t mean to hurt me. I didn’t realize things were getting so out of sorts with you. I didn’t realize I had left such an impression that you have to get over me. I know how I feel about you, and I’m always out of sorts. I’m getting used to it.”
“I’m sorry about all this. I need to keep myself out of clubs in Manhattan.”
“If that’s how you feel.” She retrieved the pom-poms. “Are we still meeting in the student parking lot?”
“Just as planned. By the way, the outfits are outstanding.”
“Enough to wow the other team?”
“That’s an understatement.”
“Careful about those compliments. They can cause trouble.” She smiled a bashful smile and headed for the showers.
CHAPTER 6
The double black Durango pulled up in front of the house, and Brandi wanted to get out of there before her father woke. She didn’t need to hear her father’s mouth about why she was going up there with her professor. Dad hasn’t gotten the fuel injectors fixed on my car yet, so what can I do other than ride with Tim? Does he want me to walk to White Plains? It would be hard enough dealing with a man she was attracted to who wanted nothing to do with her, but also to hear flak about it? She wasn’t in the mood for it.
The minute she saw him she remembered the nightmare she had had: Tim was making love to her, then he pulled the mask from his face, revealing Eric’s nasty, snarling persona. The nightmare awakened her at 3:00 in the morning and she had not been able to get back to sleep. No matter what, she had to put on a nice face and be civil to Tim. Her life and her feelings about him weren’t his fault, but she still wanted him as she had never wanted any man before him.
She slid into the passenger side. “Good morning, Tim. How are you?”
“Sleepy as hell, but I’m looking forward to hearing lectures on the greats of literature. I hope you are, too.”
“I am. I didn’t sleep well, but I had better wake up because my next paper is on someone from 17th century lit. Remember?”
“I do. Which author are you doing?”
“Maybe Samuel Sewall. I read ‘The Selling of Joseph’ in high school.”
“Did you like it?”
“Very much. I should read it again, become more familiar with it.”
“Good idea. By the way, which high school did you attend?”
“Brooklyn High.”
“Good school, great drama and literature department. I did a seminar there for the twelfth graders about a year ago. I just wish more people were familiar with the arts, to know and explore people like Fitzgerald, Rowlandson, Countee Cullen, and other great figures of literature. There’s so much to tempt the minds of young people these days. A lot of it is all the wrong stuff.”
“Like what?” Brandi inquired.
A sly smile came to Tim’s face. “Like gangster rap.”
Brandi smirked at his statement. “Yeah, like you’d know about that.”
“I’ve heard rap before, Brandi.”
“Do you own any?”
“No. I don’t like it well enough to buy any.”
She yawned, and leaned back in the seat. “I’m sure you know about Sinatra, Manilow, soothing, something you can’t get up and do the Hustle to.”
“Fine, make fun of me, but it’s actually about time I did settle down to something smooth and relaxing.”
“What do you mean?”
“I was wild for a long time, doing what I wanted, when I wanted to. I’m still that way, but counseling toned me down. I was really something.”