the right woman to have any with. In spite of all he believed, here he was with a child on the heels of turning forty years old in two short years.
Raising a child was a serious commitment. He never committed himself to anything in his life other than his business. It amazed him how such a tiny baby had impacted his life and filled his heart with so much love. Love he never knew existed, nor knew he was capable of giving. No longer was he that self-proclaimed bachelor. He was now accountable and responsible for someone other than himself, and it scared the hell out of him.
He’d been wrong about everything. Having a child was a wonderful gift. Each and every time his son gazed at him, with eyes identical to his own, Nick fell in love with him all over again. He refused to have the same strained relationship with NJ that he had with his father. The strained relationship was partly because his father never had time for him. He was too absorbed in his career to be involved with Nick as a child. His father’s main objective was becoming a federal judge. His primary love was for the law and not his family.
Every game, boys scout outing, field trip, or any other activity he was involved in as a child his mother attended every event as if she was a single parent. As a small child around the age of five or six he remembered an argument between his parents. “You never spend time with your son. All you do is take on case after case, leaving me to raise Nicholas on my own. He needs you to be a father to him,” his mother tearfully complained. Nick never forgot his father’s harsh rebuttal to his mother’s complaint. “You wanted a baby. Now deal with it! And leave me the hell alone!”
Nick until this day resented his father for placing that burden on his mother. He promised himself that he would never treat his son as nothing more than a mere interruption to his life.
For years, he couldn’t figure out why his mother put up with his father. That wasn’t the first, or the last time he witnessed his father’s gruffness toward his mother where he was concerned. After making his first million, Nick offered to take his mother from his father’s home. She refused telling him, “Son my place is with your father. I made a vow before God to love him until the end.” And that’s exactly what she had done up until the last breath left her body.
The night of his mother’s death, he and his father nearly came to blows as Nick released years of pent up frustrations. The sight of his father weeping over his mother’s dead body made him sick. After years of neglecting his wife, he decided to be a husband. However, it had come a little too late for Nick’s mother. After thirty-five long years of marriage, she had been diagnosed with an aggressive form of pancreatic cancer. That night he accused his father of never loving his mother. “You never loved my mother. You practically ignored her for as long as I can remember. She should’ve left you years ago. Maybe she would’ve had some happiness in her life.” When his father angrily defended himself, Nick brought up every overheard argument beginning with the one he’d heard as a very small boy.
He would never place that heavy burden on Summer. Never would she be made to feel as though she was a single parent. He was involved with their son from the moment of his birth. Summer was very accommodating and sensitive to Nick’s needs as a new father. Before he could suggest going to NJ’s first doctor’s appointment, she had called him at the office requesting he go with her so he’d be familiar with the baby’s pediatrician. When she first brought NJ home Nick would call to make sure it was okay to come over to see his son. “Nick, you don’t have to ask permission to see your son. Just come over whenever you want to see him.”She was making the best out of a situation that had the potential to be downright ugly. And Nick appreciated her for doing so.
After feeding NJ, Nick placed him on his shoulder and gently patted his back the way Summer had showed him. When the baby gave up a big burp, Nick cradled him with his head in his hands and his little body resting on his forearms.
“Buddy, what am I going to do about your momma? Your old man messed up real bad. It may be too late for me. I treated her like s―” Nick abruptly stopped, not letting the foul word escape his lips as he remembered he was talking to an infant. Lately he was making a conscience effort to curb his inappropriate language around the baby. He didn’t want NJ picking up his nasty habit when he got old enough to talk.
The entire time he talked the baby intently held his gaze as if he understood. NJ’s little lips curved in a toothless smile and he cooed as if to say, “You better hurry up and figure it out Daddy.” A deep rumbling laugh rose from the pit of Nick’s stomach. Leaning down he placed a delicate kiss on the baby’s forehead. “Don’t worry. Daddy’s going to win your momma back.”