A Soldier’s Heart(44)

“Matt’s right!” Kendall came to rigid attention. “I’ll have the innkeeper’s wife in to chaperon,” he declared, coming to his senses.

True to his word, a few minutes later a comfortably round woman wearing a white apron and mobcap entered the parlor, curtsied, and took up a position in front of the fireplace.

“Mrs. Potter will stay until you return.” Kendall smiled, his merry eyes dancing, and clasped Matt’s shoulder. “You and Serena go ahead and enjoy yourself. I’ll watch over your sister.”

His sister was being sent a look from Serena that should have singed her curls, but Cecily merely gave another soulful sigh and peered up through her lashes into Kendall’s face.

Matt, on the other hand, was feeling oddly in charity with his young sister. So much so, he had to feign sternness when a few minutes into their ride, Serena began to apologize.

“I fear Cecily is incorrigible, my lord. She means well, but is perhaps a trifle overzealous.”

“Yes. I shall have to have a word with her,” he declared firmly. “But let’s not worry about Cecily now. There is the ruin ahead.”

It faced the sea, with broken walls no longer invincible. Seabirds nested in its crannies, and weeds choked through the floor.

Matt took Serena’s arm to help her over the uneven ground and was mildly surprised to realize the close contact quickened his pulse. Unbidden, once again, memories of their wedding night crashed over him. He was gratified when they reached the only standing tower where the floor was smooth. Serena stepped away.

“It’s so quiet in here,” she whispered, moving about the space to peer at faded mosaics still discernible upon the walls.

“The stones are high and thick, breaking the wind and the sound of the sea.”

“Yes.” She nodded, glancing up to where the roof should have been, but now the clear, cloudless sky and brilliant sun were visible. “It makes it quite warm here. Actually cozy.”

“Rumor has it this is the favorite trysting spot for local lovers.” His throat suddenly dry, he waited for her reaction.

It wasn’t what he expected.

She laughed. “I can see this would be an excellent spot for boys to play. I wager you’ve spent several enjoyable hours here playing soldier and defending these wal—”

All color drained from her face, leaving the blue eyes, lit by glinting sunlight, blazing up at him with anguish.

“My lord, I…”

He quieted her by placing a fingertip over her soft lips, more determined to alleviate her distress than his own. “Shh, don’t fret. You are correct.” He lifted his finger, running it over her cheek, her color flowing back with his touch. “These were the first walls I defended. And, yes, they were happy hours.”

She was so close to him and her cherry lips were parted so appealingly, he leaned toward her, drawn by her sweetness. Not because she was his wife, but because he wanted to take this unknown, vibrant woman into his arms.

Stepping back suddenly, she broke the spell. “My, it’s grown cold.” Folding her arms across her breasts, she shivered. “We should return to the inn and see to Cecily.”

She was already moving back through the irregular opening; regretfully he followed.

In contrast to their ride earlier, a tense silence fell between them. Serena demanded Cecily ride slowly beside her all the way home so the headache would not be aggravated by a pounding gallop. Dutiful for once, Cecily complied.

The ride back was accomplished in comparative silence, but as he was preoccupied with his thoughts, the time went quickly for Matt.

Upon their return to the Landing, Cecily followed Matt into the library and shut the door behind them. With hands folded demurely, she stood before him. “I know I’ve been outrageous. I beg your forgiveness.” With one of her dramatic sighs, she gazed solemnly up at him. “I am ready to accept my punishment.”

Pinching her cold cheek gently, he laughed. “None of Her Grace’s subtleties for you, hey, Poppet?”

“Really, Matt, you men are so slow at times. It’s quite vexing!” Dimpling, she tossed her head, the white plume in her hat brushing her cheek. “Is my punishment complete?”

“Yes, if you answer me one question. Were your maneuvers to achieve time alone with Kendall or to force Serena and me to be alone?”

“Why, both, of course.” She laughed, dancing out of the room with much of their mother’s grace.

Staring after her, Matt smiled, oddly grateful.



In the days following their outing, Serena berated herself again and again. How could she have mentioned defending walls? Why had she brought up the very thing haunting him? It must be the bombardment of Fort McHenry that haunted his dreams. At night in the black stillness she could make out some of his words as he called orders to his men. If only he would share the nightmares with her, perhaps talking about them would rob them of power and they would cease to hold him in their grip.