A Soldier’s Heart(21)
“And Kendall?” The wide eyes stared intently at her brother, pleading for reassurance.
“Well, brat! Now fetch Mother so I might inform her.”
Picking up the hem of her dress, Cecily nearly flew from the room.
Serena’s numbing fear evaporated with Longford’s words, and relief wrenched a sob from her lips. Blackwood was safe. There had been no letter since the cherished chrysanthemum plant. Although she knew mail from the Peninsula was slow, and often as not, unreliable, her fear had grown to almost unbearable proportions. The rest of them were so cheerful and optimistic, she’d been afraid to voice her concern. Now tears of relief flowed down her cheeks.
“Good God, stop your blubbering and grow up! I was hoping Her Grace would put some bronze on you and change you into a woman worthy of my brother.” Longford sneered, even as he proffered a handkerchief.
She refused it, leaping to her feet, confusion and anger warring within her. “How dare you? Your brother holds me in deep affection just as I am and wishes me never to change!”
“You’re both babes in the woods!” Leaning one broad shoulder against a convenient prop, he studied her with mocking, hooded eyes. “Matt hasn’t the slightest idea what, if anything, lies behind your pretty face. He only sees what he wants to see. He embodies all of us with the qualities he wishes us to possess. Someday he’ll be forced to accept the world, and us, as we are, warts and all. I suggest it’s in your best interest to become the kind of woman up to the challenge that will present. Quite frankly, I doubt you have it in you.”
His mocking contempt on the heels of her fear and relief caused her to clasp trembling fingers over her quivering lips. Bolting from the room, she fled past a stunned Cecily and the duchess, instinct leading her to the only tangible symbol of the regard Longford held in such contempt.
Moonlight bathed the conservatory, where the chrysanthemum flourished under her expert care. She sat beside it, letting her tears of relief flow where none could see. There were so many new emotions bursting inside her, she could hardly contain them. Especially her feelings for Blackwood, which were growing stronger as she slowly began to know him through his family and friends. Even his belongings gave clues to his character. With a jolt of anger she admitted Longford was correct in his assumption she was totally devoid of town bronze, just as she’d been totally unprepared for Blackwood’s whirlwind courtship. But something inside her had risen to both the challenge of her Season and Blackwood’s affection. And that something wouldn’t let her down now.
She’d learned so much about herself in the months since her wedding. She’d thought she was fairly well educated, for a female, until Her Grace, a renowned bluestocking, took her under her wing. If the forbidden novels had exposed Serena’s latent romantic nature, the books the duchess gave her opened new doors to history and politics, to social reform, and a whole world of ideas. Yet everything the duchess exposed her to had some bearing on Blackwood or the things he loved, especially Avalon Landing.
Slowly the decision formed to go to the Landing for the summer and autumn instead of to Avalon Hall with the rest of the family. There she could feel even closer to the man she’d known so briefly and wed. Blackwood loved the place; surely he would wish her to care for his holdings as she was the planting he’d sent. Running a gentle finger over the tight buds, she smiled, her decision providing a surge of self-confidence. Dear Buckle might say her kitten was discovering the claws necessary to expand her world. That thought was almost as disturbing as it was comforting.
When she informed the duke and duchess of her decision, they were most agreeable, insisting only that Longford accompany her for protection, and Cecily for companionship.
The duchess wore a most satisfied smile. When Serena inquired, Cecily had a ready reply.
“Mother has been hoping you’d take an interest in Avalon Landing.”
Surprised, Serena shook her head. “Then why didn’t she suggest it? I value her opinion.”
“Mother never suggests. She simply leads you until you find the proper path yourself.” The dimple deepened in her cheek. “It can be quite vexing, can’t it? Never knowing quite what she wishes you to do. And Long is just like her! But you’ll get used to it. We all have.” Cecily gave her an impulsive hug. “We’ll have such fun at the Landing, you’ll see!”
Although delighted with the prospect of seeing her new home, Serena longed to hear from Blackwood. Anxiety for his safety and the outcome of each battle weighed heavily on her, but she dared not share these thoughts with his family, who all appeared so optimistic. Unfortunately, within a week the London house would be closed up. The delays in receiving a letter would be even greater in the country.