At the party?
That was the party!
I shook my head and laughed again. I’d heard more than just Alec’s voice in the background when I called last night. I didn’t care. Beckett was so fastidious; I knew he’d leave my condo cleaner than when he’d arrived. But I got the feeling there was something he wasn’t telling me. Who else was there?
He listed a few of his friends, and I felt a pang of sadness that I’d missed out. I didn’t go to an office every day, which meant it was hard for me to meet new people. I didn’t have a lot of friends in Chicago, and now several prospective friends had partied at my house last night without me.
So what was the occasion? I texted. New opportunity? With who? Fresh Market? Someone else?
Another long pause. All of William’s secrecy was clearly making me paranoid—now I felt like Beckett was keeping secrets. Beckett and I didn’t keep secrets. Or we never used to.
Finally, he texted back. Don’t want to jinx it. Just cross your fingers and toes for me.
You got it. Legs crossed too.
That won’t last long.
Beckett could always make me laugh.
Enjoy the sun. Cold and dreary here. Laters!
Ciao for now! XOXO, I texted back.
I glanced at the clock on my phone. Barely noon. “Shit,” I muttered aloud again. Okay, that was no problem. I had work to do. I could keep myself busy for a few hours. William would probably be back in time for dinner.
I retrieved my laptop and brought it outside to work. I definitely couldn’t have done this in Chicago, but in Napa, the pool, the pergola, the weather were all perfect. I felt like I was vacationing at a luxury spa. Sure, it was a little weird to be at William’s home without him, but I tried to focus on work and I succeeded for a little while. By the time I closed my laptop and stretched, rolling my neck to work out the kinks, the shadows were growing long. I checked my watch and heaved a loud sigh. It was almost four and still no word from William. I tried to snooze on the chaise by the pool but that lasted about thirty seconds. I wandered around the outdoor area a little bit, but I didn’t feel comfortable exploring the vineyard on my own and truthfully, I didn’t want to. I definitely didn’t want to run in to any of more of William’s staff, but really it was because I wanted William to show me how he made his wine. He was so proud of what he did here and it seemed only fair to wait for him to show me everything like he promised he would.
If he knew me better, he would have realized that leaving me to hang around by myself all day was probably the worst possible thing. I wasn’t good at just sitting around, and I never had been. It was one of those things that I realized about myself after Jace died. It’s why I liked to take Laird for long walks, why I liked to run along the lakeshore. And it was why I built my darkroom. I needed to be busy, to be occupied. Me alone with my thoughts was not always a good thing, and sometimes, I needed not to think. I could lose myself for hours developing film and experimenting with different print techniques, but my eyes were crossed by now. I needed a break from work. And sometimes just an empty hour with nothing to fill it was too much. I guess that’s what happens when you become a twenty-two-year-old widow after six months of marriage. Yes, I had turned a corner since I met William. But old habits died hard.
I may still have been behind on my sleep after the late night at The Peninsula, then the long trip here and William’s early morning wake up, but the last thing I needed was time to laze around and think. Kind of like last night’s massage, which had not relaxed me. At all. But at least that had ended well. I thought again about the handcuffs, the honey, and how I felt with that red silk scarf tied across my eyes. I felt a chill race through me even though it was toasty warm in the sun. That feeling of surrender and of letting William control my pleasure had been incredible, like nothing I’d ever felt with him or with anyone else before. I rubbed at my sore wrists, which were still bruise-free. I couldn’t wait to feel it again.
By dinnertime, I was bored, antsy, and lonely. The house with the grounds and the vineyard was an enormous estate, but I still felt trapped. And a little pissed. My cell had been by my side all afternoon and though I had picked it up a zillion times, I hadn’t gotten so much as a text from William. I couldn’t wait any longer, so I finally gave in and punched in a text of my own.
Where are you???
I waited and waited. Nothing. This was what I feared.
Fine. I decided to call him. It rang and went straight to voicemail. Which pissed me off even more.
I stayed on my chaise. The sun had already set, but the outdoor heaters were lit and the well-placed landscape lighting created a warm halo of light over the whole pool area. Fernanda all but insisted that I eat dinner, and as she walked up carrying a tray, I was desperate enough to finally ask her if she knew anything. I’d wanted to ask her all day, but I had held my tongue. “Do you know when Mr. Lambourne will be back? It’s getting late.”