"You act like you're all tough, but deep down you are just as depraved as I am," I said as I whispered it into her ear. "I'd fuck you right here if I could."
"But you can't," she said, and pushed me away. I let her. I would never force a woman into anything they didn't want. It wasn't my style. "We can't do this."
Kathryn
I pulled myself away from him. I couldn't kiss him. Not here. Anyone could walk in and see us. What the fuck was I thinking?
"I'm not going to let this stand in our way," Janson said. He towered over me as he put his arms on my shoulders. "I know what happened the other night was probably a mistake, but I can't help it. I don't want to let this go, not yet."
"Do you have any idea what will happen to you? What will happen to us? I know what my family is, Janson. I know what they're capable of. You can't just ask me to spit in the face of that and come back here. This isn't the world I want to be a part of."
"It's the world you were born into. That I was born into. There's nothing we can do about it. It doesn't matter how far you run, where you go, they'll find you. I'll find you." The way he said it, I knew it was more than a threat. He stood over me, so muscular, so handsome. I couldn't resist him. No, I was still angry. I didn't have a choice to come back home. He'd stolen me away from everything that I was working towards.
I had to keep reminding myself that I couldn't let him cast a spell over me. It was my fault. I wanted him all this time, and I finally got what I wanted. They always told me to be careful what I wished for. Having him did nothing to satiate my lust. Even standing there in the room with him, I had to fight every urge I had to walk over wrap my arms around him and kiss him.
"What am I supposed to do? You have me here in this house, trapped like a prisoner." I crossed my arms and tried not to pout. I might be nineteen, but I had no intention of acting like a child. I was a grown adult and I could have exactly what I wanted. Janson.
"I have to follow orders, Kat." He wasn't angry, but I knew I was pushing it.
"Does my father know I'm here?" I asked.
A knock on the door interrupted us, and I stiffened, but he answered as he explained. "Of course not. This was all Greyson's idea. Your father didn't care where you were."
I didn't think it would sting, but it did. He never really cared about any of us girls; the only thing we were good for was bargaining chips. He wanted to use us to marry off to important men, to appease those in his organization. It might have been modern-day, but to him, it would always be the 1950s.
A man stepped in through the doorway.
"Did you tell him?" Janson asked.
"Yes, Greyson knows. I'll be your second on guard duty."
"Another babysitter?" I asked.
"Michael Leery, ma'am," the tall lanky figure said as he stood over us. He was the same height as Janson, but his bulk did not match Janson's.
It was still intimidating.
"How long do I have to stay here?" I asked.
"Until you aren't a flight risk." Janson was so intense as he looked at me. I bit my lip and fought all of the urges coursing through my body. "I have a feeling that we'll be a while."
He was right. I had absolutely no intention of staying here. As soon as I was able to get out, I would head right back to Chicago. They would take me back, I just had to apologize for the way Janson treated them. Chances were they wouldn't even ask any questions. They never did. It was how I found myself fitting in so nicely with the co-op in the first place.
Kathryn
Janson reached for his pocket. "Shit, I need to take this." He walked out of the house.
I just stood there feeling numb. I wanted to scream, wanted to say something, anything, but Michael was there.
So I looked around nervously.
"Why don't you take a seat, hon? It'll just be a few minutes." He gestured to the couch in the middle of the room, so I nodded and cleared my throat and sat down.
"Are you okay? Can I get you some water, tea?" he asked.
"I don't need you to do that," I said. I was determined to hold my ground. I wasn't going to let my babysitter manipulate me.
"I know, but I'd like to. Water or tea?" he asked as he headed towards the kitchen.
I turned. I could see him from the couch. "Tea, please. With lemon?"
He rooted around through the fridge and then pulled out a small yellow fruit. "You got it."
I didn't' want to like him, I didn't want to do anything but hate all of them, but I found myself glad I had someone to talk to. Someone who wasn't Janson to tell me about himself.
"How long have you been with the family?" I asked. It was against my better judgement.
"About ten years now. My cousin was Oliver Leery, and when he died, I came down from Pittsburgh to work for the family. Shit was rough there, and your father took me in." He walked towards me with a cup of tea, the bag still hanging out of it. "Well, kind of. I have to earn my keep." He seemed upset about that. Another person my father caught up in his web.
My father. I fought the urge to spit just thinking about him. I was so angry at him. So red-hot.
"So, you ran away?" he asked as he sat next to me. I scooted a bit further away from him and shrugged. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want, but I did the same thing. That's how I ended up here."
"So you didn't ever go back?"
"Not until a few years ago, and just to visit," he said. He pulled out a flask and took a sip, then looked at me. "Want some?"
"No, that's okay." Did he even know I wasn't twenty-one yet?
"Good choice. I ran away from some shit, a brother, well a half-brother, an organization back home. It was all I could do to keep my head on straight. So many expectations."
"I know about those," I said. And I did, too. It was a constant weight on my shoulders. But there wasn't anything I could do. Get married. Be a good wife. Make sure you always look good for the family. Go to college, but don't do anything with it. Don't expect to have a career. All of those things were floating in the back of my mind. "Did they accept you when you came back?" I asked.
"Not really. Shit was going down, but they knew why I'd left. My brother, he was angry, but he told me to keep in touch. I have." He shrugged. I could tell it was starting to get awkward for him, so I spoke up.
"I don't know if anyone really wants me here," I said at last. "I mean, my brother brought me back, but I know I'm just in the way. I don't get why he did this." It was the truth I was afraid of saying, the one that flew out of my mouth, and the moment it did, I was scared. Scared of what that meant.
"He wanted you home, Kathryn. Trust me. Janson knows it, so do I."
I nodded. "But I don't know if I want to be here."
"Your life is your own, and sometimes you have to make decisions, even if no one else is willing to accept them." He smiled at me and it felt so brotherly. I swore.
"Thank you. I needed to hear that."
"But that doesn't mean you should just run off again. Greyson would not be happy with any of us." Greyson. He was right. I couldn't just take off. It wouldn't work, he'd just pull me back into this world. "You need to think about other ways to get out of this situation."
He bumped his shoulder into mine and I smiled. I'd just met Michael but it felt like I'd known him my whole life. I chastised myself. I had to keep my guard up. He was probably trying to get on my good side so that I wouldn't try and make a break for it again.
They were all the same, but a part of me wanted to trust him.
I just crossed my arms and looked at the door as Janson walked in.
"Oh, get yourself cleaned up. Got a bunch of clothing from your house. They are in your room. We're going to dinner," Janson told me. He looked at Michael, then me, and how we were both on the couch together.
I swear I saw his jaw tighten.
"Where?" I asked.
"At your brother's place."
I rolled my eyes. He was the last person I wanted to see.
Chapter Five
Kathryn
The last thing I wanted was to step into my brother's home and see his family. To have to listen to him tell me how angry he was with me. How worried he was.
I had to fight with myself every damn day I was gone, knowing he was the only person who really gave a shit about my comings and goings.
To think about him worried about me.
Of course, he sent someone out there after me.
Still, I was there standing outside his condo door with Janson's arm locked with mine.
I assumed it was to keep me from running.