A Perfect Storm(67)

"All right." But she tortured him more by saying, "I'm still in control though."

Obligingly, Spencer put his hand back behind his head.

Arizona took her time putting the condom on him. "You are so impressive, in so many ways."

He didn't want her under some misplaced delusion that he was more than  himself, more than a hardworking guy, trying to do the right thing  whenever he could. Especially with her. "I'm just a man."

"Not even close."

He forged on. "And right now I'm a desperately horny man."

She laughed.

He didn't. "I need you, Arizona. Right now. No more playing."

Her gaze met his, and it was … profound. He felt it, whether she did or not.

"I want to be inside you."

"Yeah, okay." In a rush, she moved up over him.

"You need me to touch you."

"No." She shook her head even as she guided him in. "I just want to watch you."

But he was big, and this way was so deep …

"All of me, honey."

Her bottom lip caught in her teeth, she eased down onto him. Lifted again, eased down more.

"Sit down, Arizona." Hands knotted behind his head, his shoulders, chest  and abs tense with the strain, Spencer watched her, saw the heightening  of her color, and though he didn't mean to, he took over. "Brace your  hands on my chest."

She did, arms straight and stiff.

"That's it." His voice sounded gravelly, but he couldn't help that. "Now  put your legs out. Relax. More, honey. Yeah, let me all the way in."

Fully seated on him, she pressed down more, grinding until Spencer couldn't help but give a harsh groan.

"Okay, sure," she panted. "That did it for me."

Fighting the urge to drive up into her, he asked roughly, "What?"

"Hearing you sound all turned on."

"God, Arizona, how could I not be?" He stared at her body, at her face.  "Do you know how you feel to me? How damned good it is to see you like  this, to be with you like this?"

"Yeah, okay." She held out her arms. "You can take over. Feel free to get as touchy as you want-"

Before she'd finished, he dragged her down to him and wrapped his arms  around her, touching her with his hands, his mouth, holding her steady  as he thrust up feverishly …                        
       
           



       

Her nails bit into his shoulders, and she cried out.

The second he felt her coming, Spencer wanted to join her, but instead he held back.

It wasn't easy.

Clamping his hands onto her bottom, he helped her maintain the rhythm so that she felt every single ripple of pleasure.

Very soon, he decided, it would be his turn. But this time would be different.

And it would be important.

* * *

WHILE IN A DREAMY FOG, their heartbeats still pounding together, feeling soft and limp, Arizona smiled. "Better and better."

Spencer stroked her hair lazily, and then, slowly, he turned them until  he'd moved over her. Still deep inside her, he positioned himself on his  elbows, keeping the weight of his chest lifted off her. He watched her,  his hand gentle at the side of her face.

Funny, but just like that, just because it was Spencer, she realized that it wasn't so terrifying after all.

He kissed her forehead, the bridge of her nose, her lips. "Okay?"

She felt the trembling in his big body and nodded. "I want to watch you come."

He put his forehead to hers and slowly withdrew, slowly sank back in.  She felt his strenuous breaths against her lips, felt the heat pouring  off him.

In a way, it felt more secure, having him over her like this, covering  her with his size and strength; it felt … protective, instead of  controlling.

Without really thinking about it, Arizona lifted one leg around him.

He thrust a little harder, a little faster.

Incredible. She twined the other leg around him, too, and tightened.

"Arizona," he whispered, and he kissed her, hot and languid, deep and  hungry. Two strokes later, he put his head back and growled out his  release.

It was pretty amazing. She smiled as her legs slipped away from him,  smiled that even now, after coming, he thought to stay on his elbows.

Protecting her. Always thinking of her.

Caring for her.

Damn it, emotion got a stranglehold on her.

He took several deep breaths, kissed her neck, her mouth again, and looked at her. "You're okay?"

Eyes closed, she nodded.

Spencer brushed her hair away, smoothed her eyebrows with his thumb. "I  want you to look at me, honey. I need to see that you're okay."

But she couldn't do that.

Tears burned her eyes, and she didn't want him to misunderstand.

"Arizona?" Soft, insistent, he said again, "Look at me, honey."

Instead, she wrapped her arms tight around him and squeezed to keep him close. "I never cried before meeting you."

He didn't ask her not to cry. He said nothing at all.

He just held her as he rolled to his side, tucking her in close, surrounding her with his heat, his size, his affection.

And to her mortification, it all boiled over. She heard the first sob  and wanted to die. But the second sob came, too, and then more, until  she was soaking his chest and shaking with racking sobs.

Somehow Spencer sat up and, holding her close in his arms, put his back  against the headboard. He did her a solid by turning off the bright  bedside lamp, leaving them with only the intrusion of the hall light. He  pulled the sheet up and over them, one hand fisted in her hair, rocking  her gently.

And he kissed her forehead, her ear, the top of her head while stroking her back, her hip, and hugging her.

Over and over again.

"God, this sucks," she complained around a hiccupping wail.

"Not with me," he said softly. "I'm special, remember?"

She laughed and buried her face against his throat to cry some more.  Yeah, he was special, all right. So special that it was killing her,  when nothing else had.

Finally, after what felt like forever, her breathing evened, and the  wave of turbulence passed. Spencer shifted, reaching out, and came back  with a tissue box. He offered it to her in silence.

After she'd cleaned up her face, she felt too foolish for words. "I'd apologize-"

"But you don't need to." He squeezed her … protectively. "Not with me. Ever."

"I figured." She snuggled in again and sighed. Her thoughts ran this way  and that, but she couldn't seem to nail them down. "I guess you're  getting tired?"

"No."

"Me, either." Against her nipples, she felt his sexy chest hair and the  reassuring thump of his strong heartbeat. "Or are you just saying that,  because you don't want to interrupt my crying jag?"

"No." He looked down at her. "And you're not crying anymore anyway."

"Pretty repulsive, huh?"

"No. Not ever." He squeezed her. "And don't say things like that. It pisses me off."

"You cursed."

Shrugging, he said, "And you cried. So we're both human."                       
       
           



       

Was that how he saw her excess of emotion? As just being human? "Well, I feel dumb."

"Please, don't."

She frowned at him. His short replies were starting to bug her. "Not feeling real chatty?"

"I'm just enjoying holding you."

Had to be a joke, right? Was that really how he felt? He wasn't disgusted, wasn't uncomfortable-

"Whatever you're thinking, Arizona, you're wrong." He brought her face  up and pressed his mouth to hers. "I'm glad that I was the one here with  you, not anyone else. And I'm humbled, because you trust me that much."

Trust, huh? Okay, so maybe it did have to do with trust. But it also had  to do with knowing that tonight might be her last night with him. "So … "  She traced a fingertip over his throat. "Do you feel up to a shower?"

"Sure."

"And then maybe … " She cleared her throat. "This is awkward. I mean, after me bawling and all."

His smile touched her forehead. "You want me again, baby?"

Perceptive men were so sexy. "Yup, that's about it."

With no effort at all, he left the bed while still holding her in his  arms. "I'll need an hour or so. But I figure it'll take me that long  just to kiss you all over, so we should be good to go."

And he called her diabolical?





CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE


THE SECOND HE AWOKE, even before he got his heavy eyes open, Spencer knew she was gone. It hit him like a tsunami of ice water.

The bed, the house, the very air felt empty.

Arizona's vitality, the energy that surrounded her even while she slept-all gone. The void left him feeling empty, too.

He sat up and checked the time. Only nine o'clock. They'd stayed up well  into the night making love, and he'd gone to sleep with her wrapped  around him.