“But I can skate already and I want to be on the Mites team now,” Emily pouted.
Sensing the discussion might become fraught, Jake tried to reassure her. “You’ll have fun and they’ll make sure you’ve learned the basics properly. Once the coach sees you can skate well, he’ll move you up to one of the teams.”
“One step at a time.” Maggie’s disapproving expression said he’d put his foot in it again.
Jeez. How had giving simple advice become so complicated?
Emily must have realized she’d pushed as far as she could. She skipped to the back door. “Can I go and tell Amy? Maybe her mum will let her play hockey, too.”
Maggie had barely said yes before Emily dashed out.
The atmosphere in the silent kitchen was tense. Unsure what to say to make things better, Jake stacked the discarded leaflets into a neat pile on the table.
Maggie drained the sink and began wiping the countertops.
Perhaps he should ease her mind about youth hockey.
Jake cleared his throat. “I know you’re nervous about letting Emily get involved in a sport you don’t trust, but she’ll be fine. They don’t allow hitting and checking at that age and they wear every type of protection imaginable. The biggest problem the kids have is bruises from falling on their ass...backsides so often.”
“I appreciate that, but there’s no need to rush these things,” she said coolly.
“Come on, lighten up.” He smiled, trying to get her to reciprocate. “She’ll have a blast.”
Instead, she shook her head. “There are more important things to worry about than fun. You’re not a parent. You’re not responsible for anyone but yourself. You don’t have to worry about your child being hurt as a result of your decision.”
Her words sucker punched him.
Jake clenched his jaw. He knew all about making the wrong decision and someone being hurt as a result. That was hard enough to bear. He wouldn’t be able to live with the consequences of hurting someone as vulnerable as Maggie. Or worse, her daughter. That’s why it was safer for him not to get involved.
He had to get out of there.
“You’re right. I apologize.” Before she could respond, he said quickly, “I hate to eat and run, but I have a bunch of stuff to do before I head to Long Island. Thanks for breakfast. The Bendy Eggs lived up to their press.”
“You’re welcome,” Maggie said stiffly.
She dropped the dishcloth in the sink, then led him to the front door. “I hope the game goes well for you tomorrow.”
“Me, too.” He forced a smile, then jogged down the steps.
“Good luck,” she called after him.
He raised a hand, then focused on putting one foot in front of the other. As he pounded the pavement, Maggie’s words echoed inside his head.
So much for not screwing up.
Perhaps it was best that this happened before things had gone any further between them. Before he’d done any damage.
Jake trudged up the front steps and into his house. He continued to mull over the situation as he got his gear ready for the trip out to the Island.
Maggie was a good woman who’d already suffered enough. She deserved someone who didn’t bear the battle scars of playing sport for a living. Someone who didn’t bear the emotional scars of letting his friend down. He should back off and leave her alone. Let her find that decent guy.
He thought about Maggie and some faceless Decent Guy, smiling, laughing, holding hands. When he got to the guy undoing her buttons, Jake’s gut twisted sharply. His fist tightened on the handles of his duffel bag.
No damn way.
Okay, so he didn’t want to back off. What the hell was he going to do? How could he be with Maggie when she deserved so much more?
He was no closer to an answer when Tru’s horn tooted outside.
Jake hefted his bag over his shoulder and headed out the front door. He’d have to think about this later. For now, he had to focus on tomorrow’s game.
Easier said than done.
He couldn’t get the problem out of his head. On the bus ride to Long Island, through the team dinner and long into the night, he kept trying to figure out how he could be with Maggie. He tried to analyze the situation like he did his game. He replayed the scene at breakfast, trying to see if he could have handled things differently.
By dawn, all he knew for sure was...maybe.
The morning skate went badly. Jake was a step off the pace, battling to get his legs under him. His coach and teammates blamed rust for his scrappy play.
Jake knew better.
He had to get Maggie out of his head before the game. He had to focus.
Tru grabbed the seat next to him on the bus back to the hotel. “You’ll be fine, bro. Once you’re into your pregame routine, the nerves will disappear.”