A Momentary Marriage(70)
Abby laughed. “It was a bit dull.” She slipped her arm through Laura’s and they turned to stroll deeper into the garden. “How is Anna?” Laura asked.
“Delightful, of course.” Abby grinned. “You must come visit us and see her again. It seems as if every day she’s doing something new.”
“Thank you. I shall.”
“You know, I am quite determined we shall become friends.”
Laura glanced at the other woman, startled. “I should like that, as well.”
“I hope I’m not too blunt. I hate to hint at things.”
“I don’t mind,” Laura assured her. “I prefer to be straightforward myself. And I would value our friendship. You’ve already done a great deal for me.”
“We’ve . . . exchanged favors,” Abby agreed. “But I would like there to be more between us. When I first met you, I thought, well, finally, here’s a woman in England I could be friends with.”
“I liked you, as well,” Laura told her. “It’s just—”
“Graeme. I know. It’s awkward. But I’m hoping it doesn’t have to be.” Abigail came to a stop and gazed earnestly into Laura’s eyes. “Graeme has told me what good friends the two of you were; you’re important to him. So is James. I don’t want there to be anything that hinders that closeness.”
“I feel the same.”
“Good.” Abigail began walking again. “I will tell you that I was jealous of you when I first saw you. So lovely and English and blond. So well bred.”
“Oh, Abigail, no . . .”
“Don’t worry.” Abigail smiled at her. “Graeme has convinced me of his love for me. I’m not jealous. I wanted to make sure you know that. But I didn’t know . . . whether the situation would be difficult for you.”
“You mean, do I still pine for Graeme?” Laura asked wryly.
“Yes.” Abigail turned her vivid green eyes on Laura, serious, even sympathetic. “I don’t want to cause you pain. But now that you have married James, I hoped it meant you no longer felt the same about Graeme.”
“Since you are so honest with me, I must be with you, as well. I’m not entirely sure how I feel about James. But I am quite sure I don’t wish I was married to Graeme. Seeing how happy Graeme is, I could not feel any way but pleased.”
“Really?” Abby’s expression was one of such astonishment that Laura had to laugh.
“Yes. Really.”
“If I knew that Graeme was happier with a woman other than me, I think I’d want to scratch her eyes out. His, too! No, I’d want to do worse than that to him,” Abby mused.
“I think perhaps you love Graeme in a way I don’t. A way I’m not sure I ever did. Graeme is dear to me; we were friends for years. But I didn’t—I mean, when James—” Her words stumbled to a halt, her cheeks turning fiery.
“My goodness, don’t stop there,” Abby said. “When James what? Has he—I mean, I thought he was so ill he . . . I’m sorry. I’m too inquisitive. I beg your pardon.”
“No, I’d—frankly, I’d like to talk to someone. But I can’t talk to Tessa about James. Or Mirabelle. And Patricia and Adelaide are . . . um . . .”
“No need to explain. I’ve met Patricia and Adelaide.”
Laura smiled, but her cheeks were still flaming. “It’s embarrassing. You probably don’t want to hear such things.”
“My dear, this is exactly the sort of thing I want to hear,” Abby said, with such an easy droll manner that Laura relaxed.
“Very well.” Laura took a deep breath and began. “Obviously, ours was not a love match. James and I weren’t friends—just the opposite. I was stunned when he proposed.”
“Perhaps he had been harboring a secret passion for you all these years?” Abby suggested.
“James?” Laura laughed. “You have met him, haven’t you?”
“Well . . .” Abby shrugged. “I hoped it was something terribly romantic.”
“Not at all romantic. But very kind. He’s a good man, however much he tries to hide it. I have come to care for him.”
“Do you love him?”
Laura hesitated. “I don’t know. It’s not the same.”
“As it was with Graeme?”
Laura nodded. “I don’t think James is wonderful or that he’s a perfect example of a man, as I did Graeme. James is excessively irritating sometimes. He’s aloof. He’s very . . . sealed off, somehow. I don’t know him; I’m not sure I’ll ever really know him. He doesn’t want anyone to. But I enjoy being with him. It makes me happy just to see him. And I feel—I have such—” A flush spread across her cheeks and she glanced at Abby, then away. “I want him.” Her words came out barely above a whisper.