“You thought about applying?”
He nodded. “After meeting your father, I definitely thought about it. But it wasn’t for me.”
She snorted. “You would’ve left before the end of the first year. Not sure your Dom could handle working there.”
He smiled, a flash of white in the darkness, and she could feel her heart turn over. Lord, she had it bad for a man when just his smile had her turning to goo inside.
“So what would you do if you weren’t in the FBI?” he asked.
She shrugged. “Not sure, really. It’s all I’ve trained for. I guess I like the idea of writing.”
His eyebrows rose at that admission, and she tried not to get defensive, but it was hard.
“Like books your father wrote?”
She shook her head. “No. Fiction…more romantic suspense.”
He didn’t say anything, and she looked away as her face heated. She had never told another living soul that she was writing, except an old lover, and she would never admit to writing romance. Who would expect her to? She definitely hadn’t.
“Not like it’s anything important. It was just something I did while my father was ill. It was an easy way to escape.”
“Don’t do that.”
“What?”
He shook his head. “It was important, even if you don’t do it anymore. It’s something that is part of you, and you should never belittle it. Your father’s illness had to be tough. I take it you weren’t involved with anyone romantically?”
She shook her head, not wanting to admit to him this was the deepest relationship she’d had with a man. She had never been able to let go the way she did with him. To be close to thirty years old and not able to say she’d had any kind of serious romantic relationship was sad.
“It was what you needed…need.” He let one eyebrow rise as if daring her to deny the fact she still wrote. “Whether you do it for just you, or if you have aspirations of being a published author, it is part of you, part of what makes you Maria. What I went through in Seattle with my old partner, it sucked. Fuck, it was the worst thing I have ever been through. Probably because it was the double whammy of a personal and professional fuck up. But I wouldn’t change it.”
“Really?” she asked, unable to keep the skepticism out of her voice.
“Really. I learned about BDSM because of that situation. I lost complete control of my life there, and I needed something else, knew I was missing it. So, no, I can’t say that I would change it. During the process, hell yeah. Nothing like being treated like a leper by people who used to respect you. Worse, the pitying looks from people when they know not only that your career is off course, but you let your dick do the thinking. But, as I said, I found what I needed in the bedroom, and it helped me get back in control of my entire life.”
His fervent words rang true, and she could see it in his expression.
“Don’t belittle a part of you that is apparently important. It helped you get through a tough time, and it made you even tougher, I bet.”
Maria nodded, unable to look away from him. He slipped his hand up to cup her face. His eyes softened.
“Why can’t you see that all these things make up one wonderful, sexy woman?”
She blinked, trying to hold back the tears that were now stinging the backs of her eyes. She shook her head. “You don’t know me, not really. Admit it.”
He nodded. “I do. You’re amazing, and until you accept that, you’ll never be truly happy.”
He was undoing her in small degrees. Didn’t he know that this would leave her shattered? She couldn’t take anymore, but instead of running away like she usually did, she leaned down and pressed her mouth against his. The warmth of him, the special musky, sensual scent of him, surrounded her as he slipped his arms around her and pulled her down on the bed with him. She didn’t want to think or talk anymore, and apparently he sensed it. He took her then, hot, fast, and hard and allowed her to lose herself and forget the worries, even if for a little while.
· · · · ·
The man they called The Dom studied the front of Rough ‘n Ready. Fuck. The bastard wasn’t coming tonight. He should have known Carino wouldn’t make it two nights in a row. But since he’d seen him with his new slut, The Dom was sure Carino would want to show her off.
Another group of giggling women walked up to the front of the club. Sluts. Of course, they were turned away. So many of them willing to play in the rooms of the club, but there was a hefty price tag for joining. If a woman had the money, she could spread her legs for any bastard who thought himself a Dom. There weren’t that many.