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A Little Harmless Addiction(11)

By:Melissa Schroeder


Jocelyn remembered Chris’s gag reflex and the fact he couldn’t stand the sound of retching. She dissolved into giggles. “Oh, God, you’re getting morning sickness too.”

“Shut up.” But the smile he gave softened the rebuke. “What are you doing here anyway?”

“I can’t seem to sleep past four in the morning.”

He nodded. “It takes about three or four months to completely get over the time difference. Or it did for me.”

“And I think I might take a boat ride today.”

His eyes narrowed. “Anyone in particular you’re going to go with?”

She sighed. “Get off it, Chris. I’m not going to get involved right now, and if I was it isn’t any of your business. But I trust Kai to be responsible. From the online reviews, his sightseeing tours are considered some of the best on the island. I just thought I would do something touristy before I started looking for a job.”

“I don’t think you need to do that,” Cynthia said.

Jocelyn smiled as she turned around and saw Cynthia there. “Hey, who’s manning the front?”

“Hilary. She’s my part-time help.”

“I need full-time work.”

“You don’t need to work,” Chris said.

She shared a look with Cynthia. “Yes, I do. I need to feel like I am doing something. The last few months have been hard on me. I need to keep busy.”

Chris opened his mouth to argue, but Cynthia came to her rescue. “I was talking full time. Or you can do some contracted work for me. I’ve been getting requests for cakes, which I can do, but not the big fancy things. Weddings especially. Hawaii has a lot of people who come here to marry but I don’t have the skill. If you think you might want to do something like that, let me know.” She walked around the table and kissed Chris on his forehead. “Feeling better, babe?”

“Fine,” he grumbled.

“Just keep eating the crackers, it helps.”

Jocelyn started giggling before her soon-to-be sister-in-law made it out the door.

“Shut up,” he said, but there was little heat in it.

“Sorry, Daddy.”

He smiled. “Mom is going to flip.”

“First grandchild, you bet.” She glanced at the time. “I better get going. I have an early tour.”

His smiled dissolved. “Maybe I can make it out there with you today.”

“Really? I mean, with the waves rocking the boat, well, that might not be good for the stomach of yours.”

He swallowed. “That’s not funny.”

She giggled as she fell into the chair. “It seems pretty funny to me.”

“I just thought you might want someone to show you around.”

“That will be nice,” she said. “But I am in the mood for a boat ride today. And I really don’t want to play nursemaid to you.”

“I should have let Malachai sell you when Mom brought you home from the hospital.”

She laughed. “I missed you.”

“You sure you’re doing okay?”

She nodded. “Actually, I’m doing just fine. And—” she looked at the clock behind Chris’s head, “—I better get going. I want to walk to the boat. It’s just too beautiful not to.”





Jocelyn enjoyed the hum of Honolulu. She didn’t think she could ever live in the city. She was a solitary soul, but she did like to get out and experience people. She loved watching their interactions, watching the activities. It made her feel alive. And right now, everything that had happened in the last year seemed so small, so inconsequential, that she sighed with happiness. She knew she had a long time before she would be completely healed. Truthfully, she knew she would never be the same person. The sexual harassment had taken a lot out of her. She had started hating work, hating her body, and dammit, he made her ashamed her of sexuality. Like she had brought it on herself.

Greg had known her insecurities. There were plenty, and being her mentor and friend, he had learned them all. And he had used them against her, chopping away at her confidence.

The last two months, the new job, the attack…she shoved the thoughts to the back of her mind. She couldn’t deal with it now, wouldn’t until she knew she could. Unmedicated. She stopped at a street corner waiting for the light to change. She’d gone three weeks without meds, and it had been tough, but she was just enjoying the act of experiencing life again. The medication they’d had her on had made her numb.

She walked across the street and to the tour area.

Brightly colored boats bobbed in the water as she walked down the plank. Jocelyn loved the sound of waves slapping against the wood as she meandered toward the slip where Kai’s boat was. She had never really been a boat person. Not one who would spend all day out on a boat. Growing up in New Orleans, boats were a way of life. She had enough friends who had family out in the bayou or family who worked in the Gulf. It had just never been something that called to her. Still, the idea of just enjoying the crystal blue waters and beautiful scenery appealed to her. Especially today. She was feeling a little restless in Cynthia’s little house, and if she hadn’t gotten out she would have been baking up a storm. Being without anything to do, she would end up eating the majority of them. Her ass could not take that.