I couldn't bring myself to say it.
"Someone who's what?"
"A vampire," I mumbled, wishing now I hadn't brought the subject up. It was far better to go quietly insane on my own than to suffer the embarrassment of admitting I was being used by a creature whose existence I had long and vociferously denied.
"What? I couldn't hear you."
"A vampire," I said a bit more loudly, peeking at her from under lowered lashes.
She blinked at me. Twice. "OK."
I made scrunched-up lips at her. "OK? Is that it? I tell you—that's me we're talking about, the skeptical one—that I'm having visions coming from a real, honest-to-goodness, card-carrying vampire, and all you can say is OK? You're not going to laugh or make fun of me or tell me I must be imagining it?"
"Idiot!" she said fondly, grabbing my sleeve and pulling me toward the stairs. "It's because I know you that I know you must be going through hell experiencing something that's way beyond your control. Come on, Christian's waited long enough. Let's go see if we can't find the Dark One who's giving you all the trouble."
"Wait a minute! You're not even going to question whether or not I'm really having visions? I thought I was going insane before I decided to believe in them! The least you can do is appreciate how hard this is for me!"
"Oh, I know it's hard for you. I know you must be wigging out at it, and squirming with embarrassment because now you have to admit that I was right about vampires all along, but I'll save my gloating for later."
"How grateful I am for your tender mercies. That aside, how do you know that the one who is affecting me will be at the fair?" I asked, following her down the stairs, more than a little befuddled by her quick acceptance of something that still gave me the willies to think about.
"Has to be," she called back over her shoulder. "He's marked you. That's the first step in the Joining, and everyone knows they can't Join with you unless they're physically close."
I looked down at my hands as we descended the second flight of stairs. "I'm not marked."
"That's what the visions are—his mark. If they're like what's described in the books, you're experiencing things that he sees and feels, basically all his strong emotions. Dark Ones can only do that with their true soul mate, so if he's projecting to you, that must mean he's marking you as his."
Instantly I thought of Raphael.
"How many visions have you had?" she asked as we rounded the landing.
"Hmm?" I pulled my mind from the thoughts it was pursuing. "Well, the one at Miranda's was due to the gin, I'm sure, so that leaves me a couple last night in the bar, and one just before we had dinner."
She paused and turned around to face me. "You had one before dinner? When?"
"When I was standing in the hall with Christian."
"Christian?" She thought for a minute, then shook her head. "Nope, can't be; we've seen him eat and drink. Hey!"
Her eyes met mine. A chill rippled down my back. I swallowed. "Raphael."
She nodded.
"The last vision happened when Christian was kissing my hand. Raphael was standing in the doorway, watching us."
"Cool!" she breathed.
"It is not," I snapped, pushing her to get her going. She stood where she was.
"When the first visions in the bar came, where was Raphael?"
The sensation of blood flowing down my throat, subduing the hunger howling inside me flashed into mind. "He was. uh… feeding."
Her eyes widened until I thought they'd pop out. "Oh, that is so cool! He shared his feeding with you? Wow! What did it feel like? What did he do? Could you see everything?"
I closed my eyes for a minute and took a couple of deep breaths to rid myself of the remembered images. "Yes, and I'd really like not to remember it, if you don't mind."
"OK." She thought for a moment. "So you had a vision before Raphael came into the bar? Just before?"
I nodded.
"Well, then, there's your answer!" She started back down the stairs.
"Wait a minute!" I hurried after her. Christian was waiting for us at the door. "Roxy, wait up—what do you mean, there's my answer? What answer?"
"Sorry, Joy's having a bit of vampire trouble," she told Christian in a confidential tone that made me want to die right there on the spot.
Not surprisingly, he looked astonished by the news. "Is she indeed?"
"Do you have to tell everyone?" I hissed, pinching her arm, flashing a reassuring smile at Christian. He just looked at me with a faintly puzzled frown between his brows, no doubt trying to calculate how much trouble it would be to bundle me away to the local loony bin.