A Forever Love(44)
“Sorry.”
“You’ve got a lot on your mind. Anything you want to talk about?”
Nina had given her a lot of room. Hadn’t pressed, hadn’t offered up opinions, hadn’t even asked many questions. Her little sister had been just a steady presence with a ready smile and a hug whenever Aubrey walked through the kitchen or came out of her office. Even Dad had been pretty quiet about the whole host of events that was taking place.
“Max seems happy,” Aubrey said. She speared a piece of kale. “That’s what’s important.”
“He does, and of course Max’s happiness is what’s important. But I’m not asking about Max, I’m asking about you. How are you? This is”—Nina took a sip of her soda—“this is a big change. For all of us, but especially for you.”
“They fit each other. There’s this natural camaraderie between the two of them. I couldn’t have asked for this to go any better for Max.” Aubrey sighed. How could she give voice to her fears? They all seemed so selfish, and hadn’t she been selfish enough?
“You won’t lose him,” Nina said. “You know that, right? Max loves you—he will always love you.”
Aubrey set down her fork. “It’s not so much about losing him. I know it may seem like that.” She stared out the window of her office. “It’s more about not being able to protect him. I can’t control what’s going to happen to him. I mean, Justin seems focused on Max now, but he is type A in every way. This is a blip in his life. I mean, I know here, now, the two of them are having a great time, but what about when there’s a big deal or Justin has to be gone for business for weeks or—”
“Then you’ll handle it. We’ll handle it. Max and you and Justin will find a way to handle it.”
“I shouldn’t even worry about those things, right? I mean none of it has happened yet, and here I am obsessing over possibilities.”
“You’re a mom. That’s what you do. At least, that’s what I think you do from observation. Mom did that with us, you do it with Max—it’s in the job description, I think. You’re supposed to worry about all the ‘what ifs’ and contingencies so that the kiddies only have to worry about learning to fly.”
Aubrey turned to Nina. Often her sister just nailed it. Completely nailed what Aubrey couldn’t seem to put into words. “Yes, I’ve spent the past fourteen years trying to make certain Max had a solid foundation so that he can fly, and now I’m passing some of that responsibility to someone else. Another person, and that scares the bejesus out of me.”
Nina nodded. “I understand. Can I help?”
Aubrey smiled and took a swig of her lemonade. “Just keep feeding me. I think that’s probably good. And listening.” She locked her gaze with Nina’s. “Thank you for listening and not judging.”
“Oh, Aub, that’s what family is for.”
*
The rest of the day jetted away. Earlier in the day, Aubrey had asked Cassidy to help with both evening seatings. She’d told Justin and Max she wanted the three of them to have dinner together away from The Red Barn. They’d both agreed to be back to the farmhouse by seven so that the three of them could sit down together for a meal. Aubrey was cooking. Well, not really cooking as much as moving all the dishes that the cooks at The Red Barn had prepared into serving dishes. Tonight there were caramelized brussels sprouts, whipped potatoes with chives, fresh beef tips braised in a honey-lavender sauce, kale salad, and a chocolate mousse that Aubrey was having a hard time not eating right that minute.
“Mom!” Max burst into the kitchen, excitement pulsing through his body. “Oh my God, you’re never going to believe who I met today!”
No. No, she wasn’t, because she’d thought they were going to an FFA meeting. But with Justin’s connections it could be anyone from the Queen of England to the President of the United States. She put on her excited smile and set the whipped potatoes on the center of the table.
“Who?” Her gaze trailed to Justin, who had followed Max into the farmhouse. He held a bouquet of fresh wildflowers and handed them to her.
“Thank you for fixing dinner,” he said. His eyes danced with happiness. “We had a great day.”
She pressed her hand to her curls. She and Justin hadn’t been together since Max had returned from camp, but that didn’t mean Justin wasn’t tormenting her in her dreams every night. Heat climbed her neck under the rake of his gaze.
“Thank you.” She walked to the kitchen sink and pulled down a cut-glass pitcher she used for bouquets. She willed her breathing back to normal. “Max, who did you meet?” she called as she filled the pitcher with tap water.