A Broken Soul(78)

I toed off my boots and set my keys and cellphone on Lilly's bedside table, offering a polite, "Thanks," just before climbing on top of the mattress next to her and pulled her body against mine.

Seconds later the sound of the front door opening and shutting echoed through the apartment. I finally had Lilly back in my arms.

I just wish it had been under better circumstances.





Lilly



I FELT LIKE I'd been hit by a truck.

My eyes burned, my throat was sore, and my entire body ached every time I took a breath. I couldn't remember the last time every muscle in my body hurt so bad.

The sky outside my bedroom window was dark. The only light in my room was what poured through my bedroom door. My bedside clock showed it was a quarter to seven, and I rolled to my back and tried to remember what had happened that day, why I was still in bed.

A clang sounded from somewhere inside my apartment as I was trying to pick through the pieces of my fuzzy memory, and suddenly I remembered. It all came back to me like a movie playing on a screen, like I was just an observer and hadn't been the one to actually live through the breakdown.

I remembered waking up with a pain in my chest so acute I couldn't breathe. I remembered walking down to the studio in a fog, desperate to escape the reality that my father was gone. I remember losing it, falling to the ground as my sobs choked me, only to have Quinn scoop me up and hold me, attempting to offer me comfort as the weight of everything that had been happening came crashing down on me. 

What sounded like pots banging together pulled me from my head and back into the present. I stood from my bed and slowly crept into the hall, my sore body protesting every step. I stopped on a dime at the sight that greeted me. I'd expected to find Eliza as soon as I stepped from the hallway into the living and kitchen area, but that wasn't who was standing at my kitchen stove.

"Hey, sweetheart. How are you feeling?"

I let my eyes drink in the sight of Quinn as he turned back to the skillet resting on one of the burners. Using one of the spatulas Eliza had left behind for me, he flipped the pancakes before cutting off the heat and sliding the perfectly round pancakes onto a waiting plate.

"How long was I asleep?" God, I barely recognized my own voice. It sounded and felt like I'd been gargling with rocks.

"About eight hours."

Oh damn, I'd slept the entire day away. Pushing that realization to the side, I asked, "What are you doing here?"

He turned and walked toward the small kitchenette table, setting the plate down next to a bottle of syrup and a glass of water that were already in place. "I wanted to make sure you had something to eat when you woke up."

It was then that I noticed the bandage wrapped around his forearm. The sleeve of his shirt was rolled up, but that did nothing to hide the bloodstains on the cotton. "Oh my God." Without giving it any thought, I rushed to his side and grabbed his arm, lifting it for closer inspection. "What happened?" I could see the faint red from where blood had seeped through the gauze bandage, but it appeared to be old. "Are you okay?"

He took his arm from my hold and lifted his hand, tucking pieces of my hair behind my ear. "I'm fine. This is nothing. I cut it on a nail when I was fixing my deck."

"Do you need stitches?"

His lips tipped in a soft smile as he stared into my eyes, and as the silence around us grew heavy, I realized just how much I'd missed him. "Don't worry about me," he spoke softly, placing his hand at the small of my back to lead me to the table. "Let me take care of you right now, yeah?" He pulled out the chair and waved for me to sit. I did so and looked down at the food in front of me.

His kindness was too much. If I hadn't cried myself to the point of dehydration earlier, I probably would have morphed into a blubbering mess. Luckily, my tear ducts were no longer producing. "Th-thank you," I rasped. "But you didn't have to do all this."

"I wanted to," he spoke so earnestly, so sincerely. The look on his face made my stomach flip. He looked like it was taking everything in him not to touch me. I knew the feeling. However, after everything we'd been through - everything he put me through - I just didn't have the strength for it. I was done in every way possible. After today's meltdown, I knew I needed to reserve what little energy I had left into healing myself. No matter how badly I wanted to, I just couldn't heal Quinn. It was time I took care of me for a change.

I blinked rapidly, my eyes so dry they itched. "Quinn, I … " I had to swallow past the thickness in my throat. "I think you should go."

He grabbed the back of the chair next to me and slid it across the floor until it was only inches away. Once he sat, he rested his elbows on his knees and took both of my hands in his. "Lilly, I'm not leaving. After what I saw in that studio, it's clear you need someone to look after you for a while. I'm going to do that. You shouldn't be alone."