"Tell me what happened, Grey." Kacie pleaded, softly rubbing a hand against my back.
I let the sobs escape without trying to stop them. If I didn't let all the pain out-I would never move on, and it was time. Holding onto Stefan was the only way I thought I could survive but that wasn't true. I have managed to make a pretty great life for myself and now it was time to start living it.
"It's hard to explain." I answered honestly.
She leaned her head closer to mine, "Try."
I bit down onto my lip and tried to clear my throat from the tears that refused to cease.
Kacie brushed the hair behind my shoulders and squatted down in front of me so she could see into my face. "Just tell me if this is because of Richard or Stefan."
I wiped my face on the tissue Kacie pulled from the front of her apron. "Stefan."
Her face fell. "Grey, I understand anything involving Stefan is a very sensitive topic but I'm here. Keeping it all locked up can't be good, and you know you can trust me."
I nodded, leaning my head back to hopefully drain the tears from my system. "I know."
"Good," she rubbed my shoulders adding the comfort that I greatly needed. "Do you want to talk about it?"
I sniffled obnoxiously and my face scrunched up as round two of tears began. "I was in love with him." I cried out, burying my hands in my face.
As they say, the truth will set you free. And I wanted nothing more than to be free of the hold Stefan Harrison has always had on my heart.
"I never wanted to let him go. I only wanted him to fight for me but he didn't and now it's too late."
"Because of Richard?" Kacie asked in a soft, cautious tone.
I shook my head in my hands. "Because I can't do that again." My hands moved from my eyes to give me a full view of my best friend's face. "No one could ever imagine how much I loved and depended on him. When we got married it was because we were each other's next breath. I couldn't go a single day without seeing him, holding him. Stefan was the love of my life and I knew it the first day I met him."
"So, what happened?"
"He left me when I needed him the most. I have never felt more alone in my life. It didn't matter that I still saw him every day-the man I fell in love with was gone. I already mourned losing him and I won't put my heart through that again."
"Oh Grey," Kacie threw her arms around me and squeezed me tight. "You deserve happiness. I obviously didn't know your past with Stefan but I do know that you are completely right-you can't go through that again. You have a wonderful man and great friends. So, as difficult as this may sound now-you will overcome this."
My arms hugged her waist tighter. All along I had believed my only way to move forward was to hide the past from everyone-myself included. But having Kacie supporting me was something I wished I had since the day I met her.
"Thank you, Kace." I whispered out, as the last of my tears fell from my eyes.
The day passed in a way I had never imagined it could-well. It wasn't the easiest putting the past in the past, but I managed. I smiled wide and did fantastic hair, trying with all my heart to move forward. Kari and the other stylists knew something had been horribly wrong this morning, yet said nothing about it. They, for my sake, acted as if I hadn't walked in looking like a hot mess. We spent the day joking around with one another and even our clients seemed to greatly enjoy themselves. Every now and then throughout the day Kacie would give me a questioning look, checking in on me. I would always give her a bright smile and a nod, assuring her that I really was holding it together. It made me love her even more and seeing all the love surrounding me, it made me truly believe that I could let go of the past and survive.
Since I had missed numerous Mondays and came in late this morning, I decided to stay until the salon closed. I wanted to give Kacie and Kari a chance to go home early and I'd be lying if I said I didn't appreciate the distractions. My overall demeanor felt okay but I knew underneath it all I was still raw. Tyler was one of the other salon closers with me and invited me out for drinks, but as much as I wanted to not be alone, liquor was not wise. I hated thinking about going home to an empty house since Richard was working another 30-hour shift, but I didn't want to go to the bar. When I got into my car I came up with the perfect way to spend the rest of the evening.
I flipped open my phone, checking messages before I drove off, and to let Richard know where I was headed. Before I read my unread texts I composed a new one to Richard.