A Boy I Used to Love(63)

"It was just a house," he whispered.

"What?"

"The old house. I'm sorry it burned down."

"I know," I whispered. "I just … "

"I know," he said with a grin. "I had this vision of buying that place and fixing it up for you. Giving it to you. Letting you make it what you want."

"We have the memories," I said. "Right?"

"Yeah. Right. You didn't come here to talk about that house, did you?"

"No," I said.

"Need a drink?"

"Please."

River kissed me again and got out of the bed. I turned to my side and grinned, staring at his perfect ass. The way his body was built it was like he had been carved by hand out of stone. His back muscles came down right to his steel-cut ass. I bit my lip, imagining what his ass must have looked like a few minutes ago as he worked so hard to pleasure me.

He stepped into nothing but jeans and left the bedroom.

I hurried to climb of out the bed too, taking the bedsheet with me. I was going to walk out in nothing but that, but I spotted a blue bathrobe hanging on the door. I grabbed it and put it to my nose. It smelled like River. That turned me on, making my inner thighs quiver.

I put the robe on and exited the room.

I met him in the kitchen to find him standing at the counter with two beers.

"Well," he said. "Look at you."

"What are these?" I asked, pointing to a group of drawings on the counter.

"Sketches for tattoos," he said.

"They're beautiful."

"I was thinking about having my own line of stuff," he said. "Just a little dream. I started working on it a while ago, but things fell through." 

"What fell through?"

"My shop."

"Your shop?"

River twisted the caps off and gave me a bottle.

"I had a tattoo shop, Lacey. Right on the beach."

"Wow."

"Yeah, wow." He smirked. "It was a good place. I struggled to figure out how to run a business."

"What happened? Why did you close it?"

"It was just time to shut it all down, Lacey. I needed a change to save myself. Things were just out of control in my life. I never could settle anywhere for long. The second I did, I thought about you."

"Axel sent me here."

"What?"

I gave him the two-minute rundown of what had happened with Axel and his mother.

"Wow," River said. "That's a 'small' world kind of thing."

"Yeah, I guess."

"Lacey, how did you end up so close here?"

I lowered my head.

"Damn, darling, I can be anything you want right now."

"What do you mean?"

River put his beer bottle down and walked around the counter. He put his hands to my waist and looked down at me.

"Lacey, I will be anything you want. If you need someone to just comfort your body and needs, fine. If you need someone to take care of you, fine. But if this is going to be about us … don't hide. Don't hold back."

"I left to come find you," I admitted. "I ended up meeting Karen. She's been my best friend. I slept on her couch for a while. I was lost. So lost. I gave everything up, River. I reached my breaking point and just left. But when it came to actually finding you, I was terrified."

"Of what?"

"Because I should have never gone with my parents to begin with. No matter how we might have lived together and survived. I never would have resented you."

"You can't know that, Lacey. It was a hard road after you left. The garage got shut down. I was dead broke. I fought so much … I don't know how I didn't end up dead. Maybe going to prison was a blessing for me."

"Tell me about that, River."

"I told you that I had someone check on you."

"Yeah," I said, feeling that sting in my gut.

"I'm sorry, Lacey. I just needed to know if you were happy. I was close to getting pulled into an even darker world with, well, the mob. They owed me a favor so I cashed it on to check on you. My guy said you were getting married. That someone was going to propose to you. I lost my mind. I went after a fight I shouldn't have. It got busted up by the police, so I started to fight them."

"The police?"

"Yeah."

"You're crazy."

"So I did time. But the thing was … I was able to get out really early. I made it out just in time to get to our spot. It was the only thing I could think about. That, and you getting married."

I lifted my left hand and showed it to him. "I didn't get married. I couldn't do it. It wasn't what I wanted."

"Then why … " River turned his head. "No, darlin'. It doesn't matter."