I left my hands at my sides.
She let out a yell that was choked up by her coming tears.
Another flash of lightning, another crack of thunder.
The storm grew closer to us both.
I just stared into those beautiful dark eyes of hers. The eyes that kept me going for so long. Eyes that I wanted to wake up next to everyday for the rest of my life.
"I hate you right now," she yelled. "And I want to love you. I want you to tell me why. Tell me everything. But you won't even talk right now."
I stepped toward her and reached for her.
Like a damn trained ninja, her left hand swatted down at my wrist, and her right hand shot up and across my face. I swore the hit was louder than the thunder. If I wasn't bleeding from the piece of wood hitting, I was bleeding them.
It was okay though. I could take it.
And, shit, I deserved it.
And, no, I wasn't going to talk back to her. I wasn't going to stomp on her beautiful raw emotions. She had been holding all of this in for a decade. The seal was broken, and the flood was only just beginning.
Lacey spun around and shook her hand, crying.
I stepped up behind her. I put my hands to her shoulders. She quickly wiggled away from me and spun back around. Hair slapped across her face, clinging like it was glued. I'd never seen her look so beautiful in all my life.
"I want to know why," she yelled. "Not some made-up excuse, either. I want the truth from you."
"The truth," I said. "Fine. That's all I have to give to you, Lacey. I would never lie to you."
"Then show me something," she said.
Lightning, thunder, wind. The storm had engulfed the entire sky, stealing the blue, leaving a thick gray blanket over everything. The rain picked up even harder. It started to sting as it smacked against my bare skin.
I stepped toward Lacey and grabbed for her hand.
"Come on," I said.
I didn't give her a chance to deny me. I just walked, pulling her along. My heart and my head were both racing at the same pace, which usually wasn't a good combination. I always counted on at least one or the other to pick up the slack and amount to something that resembled a decent decision.
I dragged Lacey to the big-ass rock. I pulled her around and pushed her up against it. My hands were at her hips. Her hands flat against the rock.
"You want to see something? You want truth?"
I dropped to one knee in front of her. I never thought I'd have a moment like that. The shock on her face. The storm plunging down at us. The lightning and thunder closer in seconds, meaning the storm was getting closer. We had to take some damn shelter, and soon.
But first …
I clawed my hand into the wet dirt. I threw it back and did it again. And again. And again. I cleared out a spot around the pile of diamond rings I had brought up here. One by one. Year after fucking year.
I then stood up and wiped my muddy hand on my jeans.
Lacey looked down. Looked up at me. Looked back down.
I walked away.
My heart hurt. It actually, physically hurt. Seeing all those rings. Feeling the rain. All my pent-up emotions hidden away for so long.
"Why?" I heard Lacey cry out.
I stopped.
I turned.
"Why what?"
"Why all these?"
The rain was smacking the ground so hard, mud and water flew up. Another gust of wind ripped through. Branches bent and sway, succumbing to the storm's power. I stood tall and fierce. No fucking storm was going to take me down. There was only one thing in the world that could destroy me, and I was staring at her. Whether she knew it or not, she had all the fucking power in the world to control me, love me, or kill me.
"Why all the rings?" I asked.
Lacey nodded.
I could see how heavy she was breathing, desperately trying to hold herself together.
I was breathing just as heavy, spitting out rainwater as I exhaled.
"Why the rings?" I asked. "Because that's what you wanted, Lacey. You wanted that ring. And each year I would call it off with anyone that tried to have a relationship with me. All so I could stay true to my promise to you. Because I loved you. Fuck, I still love you, Lacey. That shit just doesn't go away. I couldn't chase you down, and we both know that. I spent year after year thinking what I would say to you, and there was only one thing: to ask you to spend forever with me. To make sure that nothing could break us apart again. Ever again."
A huge smack of thunder sounded like it was just a few feet above my head.
"I didn't want to bring the same ring over and over to you. You deserve more. You deserve better. And each year … you didn't show. So, I buried the ring. To bury the memory. To bury the hurt. So that I wouldn't remind myself that you weren't here."