"You don't understand, Lucy. I've always put hockey first. Now it's time to put my family first. Nicole was mouthing off about not going to college and moving to Nashville and I need to stick around to make her see that the choices she makes now are going to affect her for the rest of her life."
"Kind of like the choices you're making now are going to affect you for the rest of your life?"
When he didn't respond she knew she'd made him think.
"Nicole said she'd feel horrible and guilty if you gave up what you love to do for her. She's seen you play. And she knows how much the game means to you. I have to agree."
"I can't be a brother if I'm never here. And I already have a fifteen-­year track record of not being a good brother. I don't even know my own twin anymore. We used to be so close. And now . . . all I know is he's great at making money. The first time I walked into my parents' house after their funeral I noticed the photos they have around the house. All of them are group photos. The only one with me is my roster photo from last year. I'm not in any of those candid family shots. None."
Her heart ached for him. She knew he was in a tough spot. She also knew it wasn't easy living with regrets. Any way he turned he was going to have some kind of guilt, whether it was giving up hockey or continuing to play and leaving his family once again.
"How much longer is left in the season?"
He shrugged. "Anywhere from a couple of days to several weeks."
"And you don't think your family will understand if you take that time to complete what you've started? What are you teaching your sister if you quit?"
"That family's important."
"Wrong. You'll teach her that guilt overrides giving up a dream. And if that's the case, why should she bother having a vision for her life whether it's obtaining a master's degree or signing with a record label?"
"It's more than that, Lucy. Something happened before our parents died and I told her I'd try to help her figure it out."
"And you will. She knows you'll be there for her."
"If she leaves as soon as school's out that gives me no time."
"She's not going to do that."
"How do you know?"
"Let's just say that I think I understand her. I know she's searching for herself. But I'm pretty sure she really doesn't want to do it alone."
He glanced away. "I don't know."
"Look. Everyone I know quit on me and I even gave up on myself many times. I won't let you give up on you. No one expects you to give up everything for them. Talk to your family. I'm sure you'll see that they support you and your career a hundred percent. You've worked all your life for this opportunity. Take it. Everyone will still be here when you're done."
Because she could say no more, because she was silently begging him not to quit on her, and because it was breaking her heart to stand there and see him so torn up inside, she knew she had to leave.
"Don't quit on Nicole," she said in parting. "Be her champion by giving her guidance, even if it's from miles away. Show her what hard work and determination can accomplish. And let her know that love doesn't have time or space limits." She kissed his cheek and headed for the door.
"What about you?"
She turned. "What about me?"
He crossed the floor and stopped in front of her. The masculine scent of his warm body, soap, and sex drifted up like a wonderful perfume that made her head spin.
"If I don't quit, will you still be here when I'm done?" he asked.
"In the beginning, everything inside of me told me to run. That you would only hurt me again. That a man as perfect as you would never truly find anything special about someone like me. But I took a chance anyway. As much as I tried not to, I've fallen in love with you. So prove to me you're not a quitter and yes, I'll still be here."
She reached for the door and he stopped her with a hand on her arm.
"Promise me," he said. The haunted look in his eyes verified it was important for her to do so.
"I promise. Now you have to prove it."
Before she could change her mind, she opened the door and walked out.
She just hoped it wouldn't be forever.
Chapter 17
Sleep came in short spurts. Jordan finally got up at six o'clock after looking at the clock radio for what felt like every hour on the hour. All night his mind had whirled with the dilemma. No matter which way he turned, he'd end up letting someone down. Whether it was Nicole, Lucy, his brothers, his teammates, or his fans. And he had no one to blame but himself.