“Okay, then I’ll head out.”
“Yeah, you should go.”
But neither of them moved.
“Walker…” Her voice trailed off. He waited to see if she’d try again.
Rolling back her shoulders as if preparing for a duel, she met his gaze dead on.
“I know we have a million things to think about and this shouldn’t top anyone’s list, but I have to know one thing before I go out with Todd.”
“Know what?”
She exhaled slowly. “Did that kiss mean anything to you?”
His breath shuddered to a stop in his lungs. Trust Clara to go straight for the kill.
This is my opportunity. My chance to tell her what I really want.
Then she’d stay. He knew she would. She’d cancel on Todd and stay with him because of where it might lead. They would pop open the champagne in the kitchen, and the alcohol would take the edge off. When he leaned in to kiss her, she would meet him halfway. He’d have her in his arms the way she always should have been.
And she’d think they had a future. One that could be serious and permanent when he wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to offer that.
I’d be asking her for everything and giving nothing back.
He couldn’t be the partner she’d always dreamed of. Not when he knew firsthand what lay down the path of love and commitment.
Meanwhile, the right man for her might be moving on to the next woman all because he’d been selfish enough to try to hold on to her when he knew he didn’t have any right.
It all came down to his choices again. Did he do the right thing or did he try to keep her for himself?
Really, there was only one option. Clara was the one thing in this world he could never hurt. He’d protect her to his last breath.
Even from himself.
“It was the stress,” he forced himself to say. “I’m sorry I crossed a line.”
The light in her eyes died. “Stress.”
“I’m exhausted. Hunter is taking up all my energy. I just…slipped.” He laced his hands behind his back to keep from touching her. “Do you forgive me?”
Her silence was damning.
“I promise—” The words died on his tongue as his body fought against saying the vow he never wanted to give. “I promise it won’t happen again. I’ll never touch you like that without your permission.”
I’ll be your friend. Your goddamned brother. I’ll be whatever you need me to be so long as I don’t lose you.
Her gaze slid from him. “What a relief,” she said, lifting her chin. “I’m glad we sorted that out.”
“Me too,” he said through numb lips. She’d never know what it cost him to lie to her. To put her first. Their kiss would haunt him the rest of his days. And he would regret his promise just as long.
Not giving him another moment of her time, she neatly stepped around him and walked into the kitchen. He stood by silently as she checked on Hunter, tenderly kissing her fingertips before brushing them over the baby’s brow. His heart twisted at the sight. He’d made the right decision. As long as he could keep Clara in his life, she’d be in Hunter’s. His son would have the best role model in the world looking out for him if he ever couldn’t.
With a last glance at the baby, she turned and walked straight to the door without bothering to say goodbye.
The click of the lock behind her might as well have been a death knell.
…
Stress.
He’d kissed her because he was exhausted and stressed out of his mind. It hadn’t been jealously. Hadn’t been dormant feelings awakening. She’d just been the closest woman present when exhaustion had made him snap.
Clara punched the elevator call button with more force than was necessary. Here she was, spinning her hopes around what turned out to be nothing more than a simple mistake. He didn’t feel the way she did. He didn’t want her the way she wanted him.
It might have been stress that made him do what he did, but to her it had meant so much more.
I’m a fool to have thought it was the start of anything.
No matter how long she waited, Walker would never be the man she needed. It was time to pull up her big-girl pants and move on.
Stepping into the elevator she concentrated on what mattered. She had a date with a charming man, and he deserved her undivided attention. Much more than her ridiculous roommate did.
She kept that thought front and center on her journey to the restaurant. They’d have a fun evening out and she’d forget about the man she left behind. It’d been far too long since she made time for dating. This would be good for her. Maybe she was only fixating on Walker because of their current situation. Maybe it was just stress for her, too.