Sinful Nights(12)

This isn't easy for me either you know,' he told her grittily, but why  should I expect you to realise that? You were never any good at seeing  the other person's point of view.'

Meaning what exactly?' The anger that had been burning inside her all  evening burst into destructive flames. That I should have played the  "understanding" wife and turned a blind eye to your affair?'

Light spilled out into the cobbled courtyard as Blake pulled up outside  his house. He stopped the engine and Sapphire saw him tense almost as  though he were bracing himself to do something. Sapphire, look, my  "affair" as you call it never  … '

I don't want to hear about it.' She cut across him quickly. She didn't  want to exhume the past; it was far too painful. Talking about his  relationship with Miranda forced her to remember how intensely she had  once longed to have those brown hands touching her body, exploring its  contours, giving her the pleasure her feverishly infatuated senses had  told her she could find in his arms. It's over Blake,' she reminded him  determinedly. We're two different people now.'

If you say so.' He unfastened his seat belt and opened his door. Hungry?'

Sapphire shook her head.

Come inside and have a cup of coffee then, I've got a mare waiting to  foal in the barn, I'll check up on her and then I'll take you home.'

He didn't invite her to go with him, and Sapphire stood forlornly in the  immaculate kitchen of Sefton House listening to the sound of his  footsteps dying away as he crossed the yard and entered the large barn.

Once she had been part of this world, and he would have thought nothing  of inviting her to join him. Together they had shared the miracle of  birth on many occasions in the past, but now she was deliberately being  excluded. It baffled Sapphire that the anger she sensed churning inside  him should be directed against her. Blake had no rational reason for  being angry with her: had someone asked her she would have said he was  incapable of feeling any emotional response towards her whatsoever.

More to keep herself occupied than because she wanted any she started to  make some coffee. The kitchen was immaculate, but somehow impersonal.  Presumably he had his own reasons for not replacing his aunt with a  housekeeper. At least that was one complication she wouldn't have to  face this time. Sarah Sefton had never made any secret of the fact that  she considered her far too young for Blake. She had disapproved of her  right from the very start, Sapphire mused, watching the aromatic  dark-brown liquid filter down into the jug, and breathing in the  heavenly smell.

That smells good.' She hadn't heard Blake return, and she swung round  tensely, trying to mask her automatic reaction to him by asking after  the mare.

She's fine. This will be her third foal, and we don't anticipate any  problems, but like any other female she needs the reassurance of knowing  someone cares.'

He said the words carelessly but the look in his eyes was far from  casual as he added softly, Does Alan let you know he cares Sapphire?'

All the time.' She managed a cool smile, I've made us some coffee, I  hope your "help" won't mind my rummaging in her cupboards.'

I'm sure she won't,' Blake responded equally blandly, but when my aunt  retired I decided I preferred having the place to myself. A woman comes  up from the village to clean; apart from that I'm self-sufficient.' He  saw the assessing glance Sapphire slid over the immaculate kitchen, and  said softly, I don't spend enough time here to make it untidy. In fact  recently I've been eating as many meals at Flaws as I have here.'    

 



 

Yes, I haven't thanked you yet for taking on the responsibility for the farm.'

He smiled sardonically at her, as though he knew just how hard she had found it to mutter the words.

That's what neighbours are for. Your father would have done the same  thing for me had our positions been reversed.' He pulled off his jacket,  dropping it carelessly on to the table, and then checking and picking  it up again. One special licence,' he told her withdrawing a piece of  paper from an inner pocket. Special dispensation from the Bishop of  Hawick. I went to see him today.'

So we'll be married  … '

The day after tomorrow,' Blake told her. In Hexham, everything's arranged, the vicar  … '

A Church wedding?' Sapphire's head came up, her forehead creased in a  frown. Somehow she had expected the ceremony to be conducted in the more  mundane surroundings of a registry office.

It seemed less public,' Blake told her carelessly. Have you told your boyfriend yet?'

Sapphire shook her head. No, but he's coming up for his car, I'll tell  him then, it isn't the sort of news I could break over the phone.'

He's going to get quite a shock.'

Why should she think she heard satisfaction beneath the cool words?  It's only for a few months, once I've explained the situation to him  … '

He'll wait for you?' Blake supplied sardonically, Get your coat on and  I'll take you back to Flaws, I've got to be up early in the morning.  We've got to get the sheep down off the high pastures, the weather's  about to change.'

They didn't speak again until Blake stopped his car outside the back  door to Flaws Farm. For a moment as she unfastened her seat belt  Sapphire panicked. What if he should try to kiss her again?

But apart from opening her door for her Blake didn't attempt to touch  her. He walked with her across the cobbled yard, both of them stopping  by the door.

I won't see you tomorrow,' he told her, but I'll be round the morning  after. Our appointment with the Vicar is for eleven o'clock, so I'll  pick you up at ten.' Giving her a brief nod he turned away and walked  back to the car. He had reversed out of the yard before Sapphire had  managed to pull herself together sufficiently to open the back door.

What was the matter with her, she chided herself as she prepared for  bed. Surely she hadn't wanted him to kiss her? Of course she hadn't. So  why this curiously flat feeling; this niggly ache in her body that was  all too dangerously familiar? Stop it, she cautioned herself as she slid  into the cold bed. Stop thinking about him.

IT WAS EASIER said than done, especially with twenty-four empty hours  stretching ahead of her with nothing to fill them other than doubts  about the wisdom of marrying Blake for a second time, no matter how  altruistic the reasons.

She helped Mary with her chores, and spent the afternoon outdoors, but  although she kept her hands busy she couldn't occupy her mind. Her  father noticed her tension when she went to sit with him.

Worrying about tomorrow?' he asked sympathetically, closing the book he  had been reading. Blake is a fine man Sapphire,' he told her gently,  I've always thought so. In fact in many ways I blame myself for the  break-up of your marriage.'

When she started to protest he lifted his hand. I wanted you to marry  Blake, even though he thought you were too young. He wanted to wait, but   … '

But you dangled the bait of this farm,' Sapphire interrupted briefly,  and he couldn't resist it.' She bit her lip as she realised how cold  and unloverlike her voice sounded. Deliberately trying to soften it, she  added, But that's all over now, we're making a completely fresh start.  We're both older and wiser.'

She couldn't bear to look at her father. His fragility still had the  power to shock her, but even so her mind refused to accept that soon he  would be gone from her.

Downstairs she found Mary busily baking. Blake just rang to confirm  that he'll pick you up at ten tomorrow,' she said cheerfully. Having a  day out?'

Her curiosity was only natural and Sapphire forced a smile. Yes  …  In  fact you might as well know Mary, that Blake and I are going to give our  marriage another try.' She couldn't look at the other woman. I suppose  it took something like my father's  …  illness to show us both how we  really felt.' That at least was true, even if Mary was hardly likely to  interpret her words correctly. The other woman's face softened.    

 



 

Yes I know what you mean,' she agreed. So you'll be moving to Sefton House.'

Yes.' Sapphire swallowed nervously. So far she hadn't let herself think  about the intimacy of living in such close proximity to Blake. No  matter how non-sexual their relationship was going to be; the thought  made her stomach tense and knot in anxious apprehension. What was she  frightened of for goodness sake? Not Blake. She already knew that he  felt absolutely no desire for her, but last night he had talked about  taking her home with him and making her truly his wife. Sapphire  shivered. Those had been words; nothing more; words designed to keep her  tense and apprehensive; and in her place. No, she had nothing to fear  from Blake. Or from herself? Of course not. She had suffered the agony  of loving him once, it was hardly likely to happen again.





CHAPTER FIVE


SHE AND BLAKE were husband and wife again; Sapphire could hardly believe  it. She glanced down at the gold band encircling her finger. It was the  same ring that Blake had given her once before. She had been stunned  when she saw it. Somehow she had never imagined Blake keeping it, never  mind giving it back to her.