Out of The Dark (The Grey Wolves #4)(42)

"I want to say I understand why you did this, Luna, but at the moment all I can ask is how the hell you could be so irresponsible?"
"Irresponsible? Seriously, Fane? Someone had to do it! Someone had to take the risk and the best option was Jen and I. You don’t always get to be the hero. Just because you're a man and I'm a woman doesn't mean I'm not capable of doing what needs to get done."
"I DON’T CARE ABOUT BEING A HERO, DAMNIT!"
Jacque cringed at the fierceness in his voice. She'd never dealt with Fane this angry. But she knew it was anger originated from fear. He was afraid for her.
"This is about me wanting my mate safe, Jacquelyn. This isn't about me being a man and not wanting my woman to show me up, or me thinking you aren't capable. I know you are more than capable, but sometimes we have to know when to admit the enemy is more than capable. Don't you get that? You are mine to protect – mine! You have taken what is mine and put it in danger. You went behind my back when you knew I didn't want you to do this. And now you're out there where I can't protect you and I'm here unable to move, wondering if you will be alright. So please forgive me if I'm not really concerned about whether or not I hurt your feelings when I say you're being irresponsible. I love you, Jacquelyn. I'm pissed at you, but I love you. You better keep yourself safe. Imagine if we were in reversed roles. Just try to imagine that."
Jacque took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She had known he would be mad, but truly hadn't prepared herself for the force behind that anger. Though she hated making him upset and hurting him, she still felt she and Jen had done the right thing.
"I'm sorry I scared you. I'm sorry that I went behind your back. But this had to be done. I won't apologize for that. I love you, I will be safe."
"Just come back to me, love. Come back to me."
"So, how'd you sleep, babe?" Jen asked casually, fighting the very dominant and Alpha nature that Decebel was attempting to use on her.
"Come back. Now." Decebel was using the same voice Vasile used when he didn't give his wolves a choice but to obey. 
"Don't do that Alpha mojo on me, B. It won't work. I'm your mate, your equal."
"After everything we've been through in the past weeks, all the hell, you leave me. You go out unprotected into a world where an evil witch and a corrupt Alpha are focusing all their energy on wiping us out. Why would you do this to me, Jennifer? How could you do this?"
Jen was biting her lip and felt blood seep into her mouth. She hadn't even realized how hard she was biting until the metallic taste hit her tongue. She cringed and closed her eyes as the memories of her pain assaulted her mind, brought on by that small reminder.
"Don't. Don't use memories to try and soften me." Decebel thought she was trying to manipulate him yet again. Now that just ticked her off.
"I wasn't trying to use my memories of the most amazing thing to ever happen to me against you. Didn't we just have this discussion last night? I told you I got it, I heard you, and I apologized. The images hit my mind because of the blood currently in my mouth." Jen winced as she realized that might have not been the brightest thing to say.
"Blood!" Decebel's voice was a deep growl. "Why are you bleeding, Jennifer?"
"I bit my lip because you are freaking me out. I feel like the worst mate in history, like I've betrayed you or something when this has nothing to do with you or us. This is bigger than us."
She felt Decebel's hands on her face. She knew if she had been in front of him right then his lips would be so close to hers that she would feel his warm breath across her face.
"I didn't mean to imply that I felt betrayed, love. But I just got you back. I've lost you twice and I can't lose you again. I wanted to hold my wife, my mate, for the first time all night last night. I wanted to wake up and the first thing I saw be your beautiful face. But instead I woke up realizing I couldn't move, and you weren't beside me, not even in the house. Can you please try to see where I'm coming from?"
Jen took a deep breath. She knew that she and Jacque were doing the right thing. In her gut she knew it was what they were supposed to do. But that didn't make it any easier to hurt her mate, to disappoint him and scare him.
"I can only begin to imagine how upset you were and are. Decebel, I have to do this. Jacque and I have to do this. I can't explain it but I just know that we are the ones who are supposed to get Rachel. Please trust me. Please know that I love you so much that at times I think my heart will explode. We'll be fine. We're moving quickly and being quiet."
Jen heard him snort.
She bristled. "I am capable of being quiet."
"I'm sure you are, baby," Decebel placated her. "If this is something you think you need to do and you've already left without me, there isn't anything I can do about it now, since I'm bound to this damn bed.. But never again, Jennifer. Never again will you go off into danger without me. You told me that if I didn't save your friends you would never forgive me. That was a line you drew. Well, I'm drawing one now. I won't be able to forgive you if you willingly place yourself in danger with no regard as to how it will affect me. My love for you is unconditional, Jennifer, that will never change, but there has got to be mutual respect for each other's feelings. You have got to meet me halfway. Can you do that for me?"
Jen wiped the tears that were trailing down her face. Her hand was trembling and Jacque had come up and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She tried really hard to keep the tremble out of her voice when she responded, but she could never hide from Decebel.
"Yes. I can meet you halfway."She heard Decebel growl. "Baby, I didn't mean to make you cry. Damn!" He growled in frustration.
Jen knew that Decebel was very upset and holding on by a thread because he rarely cursed when in her presence, be it physically or through their bond. She could imagine him lying in their bed, held immobile by invisible binding. His jaw was probably clenched so tight his teeth were on the verge of breaking and his eyes would definitely be glowing. Yeah, Jen had no problem seeing her mate in her mind, unable to protect her, unable to get to her.
"I'm okay, Decebel." Jen pulled herself together, knowing that if she didn't it would only make things worse on him. "Really, I'm okay. I'm sorry that I put you in this position and for scaring you."
"You just make sure you come back to me, whole and untouched. I'm thankful that the bond is complete because now I can go with you if the worst were to happen, but I would rather be here together – alive together. So, Jennifer Anghelescu, you better bring your stubborn ass home to me."
Jen couldn't help the smile that spread across her face when he used his last name with her first. It felt right; it was right.
"I already told you, you're stuck with me. I'll be back before you know it, dancing on that last little nerve of yours. I love you, B."
"And I you, love. Do not block me from your mind at any point." Jen smiled again when he added, albeit begrudgingly, "Please."
Jen looked over at Jacque, who still had an arm wrapped around her.
"So, how'd your furry prince take it?"
Jacque shook her head, closing her eyes. "Not good. Not good at all. What about you?"
"Well, he told me he loves me."
"That's good," Jacque interrupted.
"Then he told me if I ever do something like this again he will never forgive me."
"Ouch," Jacque muttered.
"Understatement, Thelma."
"We seem to have a lot of those." Jacque pulled out the LT again and nodded in the direction they needed to go. "Let's head out. There's nothing we can do about it now."
"Do you think Peri will leave them bound?" Jacque asked.
"She'd be stupid not to. If Decebel gets loose before we're back he'll come after me. I could feel his resolve, Jacque. I've never heard him that mad, or felt his anger and fear like that. No doubt, if she lets him go, he will be crashing through these woods like a wolf possessed."
"I have to say that Fane would be right on his tail. No pun intended."
Jen laughed. "Oh, come on, you should always claim a pun like that when it comes at the fur balls' expense." 
The girls continued on, only stopping periodically to drink water or eat the Fae food Peri had provided. It was the same food Elle had given Jacque and her group on the way to the veil. It gave them the energy to walk all that day and into the night. Jen's toes were beginning to feel numb and her legs were so very cold. Jacque's teeth chattered as the forged ahead, determined not to stop. Several times the girls both checked in with their mates. They tried to keep those conversations short and sweet since every time Decebel or Fane used the bond it was not just to ask them if they were okay, but to also remind them how what the girls' thought was a brilliant plan fell under – according to Decebel – reckless, rash, impulsive, and idiotic as defined in the Webster Dictionary. Jen let him know that she would be looking those words up to double check his accuracy. His retort was not something Jen felt necessary to share with Jacque since it involved chains, spanking, and duct tape. If it hadn't been for the tone of voice and other, nicer words Decebel had been using, she might've been inclined to think her mate was kinky.
Midway through the second day after their departure, Jacque let out a huge sigh of relief as a cottage came into view. It was exactly as Peri had described it. Jen and Jacque approached cautiously and jumped back when the front door swung open hard, bouncing against the little house.