I ran outside and saw Jacob talking to Mike.
“Jacob, you have to go upstairs and make sure he’s alright, I don’t know what he’s doing.” Jacob watched me closely.
“Are you ok?” He asked.
“No” I said with a meek smile and tears falling down my face. He grabbed my shoulder and squeezed it.
“I’m going to wait here for a few minutes before going up.” He reassured me. I held my bag tight, remembering my gift I had for Lukas.
“Jacob can I give you something for him before I go?” He nodded understanding what was going on. He opened the door to his Q7.
I had gotten him a Glen Garioch bottle of whiskey, it was forty six years old and was a limited edition, it was expensive, but he was worth it.
“I got him a whiskey, it’s stupid I know but he likes them so much I couldn’t resist.” I gave him the bottle. I looked over to Mike, he wasn’t tall but rather he had a small build and a shaved head.
“Can I trust him to take me home?” Jacob nodded.
“Mike works for Mr. Blakk so you don’t need to worry. Look Lexi he didn’t know what Mollie was doing. He’s…” I held my hand up.
“Whatever, I just want to go home now. Goodbye Jacob.” I walked over to Mike and he held the door open for me, I crawled in as he closed the door I could see Jacob heading inside.
The drive back was long. Mike tried several times to apologize but I was lost in my thoughts. My heart had just been trampled on. The world around me no longer had this rosy tint but rather a dull color of grey. I was a broken soul, the mate I thought was only chosen for me ended up being nothing more than a nightmare I had dreamt of.
We finally made it back to my place. I found it odd that Mike knew where I lived even though I didn’t give him directions. I shrugged it off, wanting my bed. I had called Philip on my drive up asking for some time off, which he gladly gave me. He was overstaffed and I was overdue. He told me he’d see me in two weeks and hung up.
I went to open the car door, but Mike was quicker.
“Ms. Lexi, can I at least say something?” I nodded. “I’ve worked for Mr. Blakk for awhile, I don’t know if I’ll have my job after this, but it’s only after you came into his life that Mr. Blakk became sort a human. He even talked about you when I would drive him around. I don’t really know what’s going on and it’s not my business but Mr. Blakk really does care for you.” I walked away from Mike, he was right it really wasn’t his business.
The Letters
As I closed the door of my home, I collapsed on the floor. I sat with my back to the door. I fished out my Iphone, I had two missed calls. Both Kaci and Roxi had called and texted me wondering which exotic place was Lukas taking me to that I needed two weeks off. Kaci congratulated me for giving in and finally having fun, while Roxi told me to have wild sex.
I cried my eyes out just thinking about how much I wish I was in Lukas’s arms right now. I felt cold, naked, alone. I curled up in a ball and cried for hours. The heart wrenching pain that rippled through me numbed me from head to toe. It was early morning when I finally peeled my broken body off the floor. The sun’s rays came peering into my condo. I never knew that the morning light could be so devastating.
I didn’t bother with music or with food. I took a shower letting the hot water spray all over me. I grabbed my loofah sponge and roughly scrubbed my skin. I wanted to wash away everything, the pain, the loss, the void. I scrubbed myself till my skin hurt. I turned off the water and wrapped a towel around me, the mirror had steamed up, I wiped it down and there looking back at me was her face. I wanted to break the mirror but I calmed myself down. Was it like that every time he saw me? Did he see her? Was I only there because of my face?
I lied down in my bed and plugged my phone in letting it rest on my night stand. The battery had run out during the night but it came to life only after a few minutes. I had a few missed calls and a message from Lukas. I hesitated but I wanted to hear his voice. I reached for my phone and pressed play for the voice message he left me.
He breathed heavy at first, I could hear him rustling in the background, “Alexia, my Alexia…” He was drunk his words were slurred and rough. “I already miss you, your voice, your eyes….the fact that I want you, that I’ll miss you…does it really mean so little to you?” He stopped he took a deep breath, I could hear him sobbing. “I’ll yearn for you, desire for you… crave your touch, to feel your warmth in my hands, to feel your heart beating as I hold you in my arms… Alexia does it really mean nothing to you? I should have told you about Olivia but… I didn’t, I didn’t want to lose you. Tell me what to do? How am I supposed to live on like this without my home, my world?” He signed heavily “Losing her was a pain I thought I could never endure again, but losing you it’s unbearable, I can’t do it Alexia its killing me. I need you too damn much. Wait for me baby I’ll come to you. I’ll fight for you, for us.”