Loving War(81)

“Tria, you’re not leaving your house, and now you’re yelling at a movie.”

“The wonderful world we live in has so many delivery services. There’s no reason for me to leave. And yes. I’m pissed that I ordered a romance and got a sick, Shakespearian twist that made it a tragedy.”

The new movie starts playing, promising to be a bit comical. Thank God it isn’t another tear-jerker.

“Tria, it has been a week.”

She underestimates how much I cared about Kode. They all do. I’m sure not even he understands it.

“Rain, if Dane and you split up right now, where would you be?”

Her brow puckers to mimic her frown. “Under the covers,” she groans.

“Well, I’m sitting on top of them, so I’m already doing better than you would be. Cut me some slack. I’m not done wallowing.”

It takes so much effort not to break down and bawl, but I manage to escape the tears. My trashcan is overflowing with tissues. I’m fairly sure my nose will be forever raw. And my poor stomach is hating me for all the junk I’ve crammed into it over the past week.

“Has he tried calling?”

Numerous times. And texting. But that’s not something I want to share. No one has to know he’s still chasing me. It’s better if they don’t, that way no one gets mad when he finally moves on. If they know he kept trying for me, then they’d think he was merely leading me on.

“Have you talked to him? He was your best friend for a lot longer than he was my boyfriend. I know what he did was shitty, but what you said… Rain, that was way too low.”

She looks down, and a tear slips free from her eye. “I know. I felt horrible about it when I woke up the next morning. I was on an emotional high, and I was way too drunk. I had told Dane I didn’t want to get married to a liar like my father, and then I called a cab. Dane was taking a minute to get himself together—probably trying not to lose his temper on me—and I left without saying anything.”

She takes a deep breath before exhaling it loudly. “Fucking Edward. I never should have read that letter. None of this would have happened. Kode had moved forward, Dane and I are together, and you were happy. I fucked it all up by going crazy.”

I pat her leg and offer her the bag of chips. She takes them, and puts the salt-and-vinegar flavored thing in her mouth, cringing when she realizes it wasn’t a plain chip. I’d laugh at her face under normal circumstances.

“I always did have a flair for the dramatic,” she adds, dusting her hands off. “Guess that’s why I started writing.”

“It’s not your fault that this happened, Rain. It’s just one big cluster fuck, and all four of us got weaved into the mess. Shit happens.”

I need her to go so I can cry some more. She’ll stay if I start crying right now.

“Are you going to forgive him?” I ask, hoping she says yes.

She gives me a weak smile. “If he’ll ever talk to me again after what I said, then I probably will. I’ve been calling, but he won’t answer. He told Maverick that he wasn’t making up with me until he made up with you. Says he’s never letting you think you come second again.”

My heart squeezes and aches in a violent, unforgiving rush of painful emotions. But now I feel so guilty for putting this on him.

“Then maybe you should go to him,” I say softly, moving my eyes back up to the movie and praying for escape.

“He never loved me, Tria. He never looked at me the way he does you. He has never held anyone so tightly in all his life as he held you at Edward’s funeral. Kode would move heaven and hell to be with you.”

She just never saw the way he looked at her, because she was too busy looking at Dane.

“He thinks you’re perfect,” I grumble. So what if I’m sulking. I’m in mourning. I’ve lost my father and the man I love in a two week span.

“Then he never really paid much attention to me. Dane knows I’m not perfect, which is what makes him love me more. Since Kode hated you for a while, I’m pretty sure he knows you’re not perfect, and he loves you anyway.”

I groan while leaning back and putting my arm over my eyes. “Rain, I love you for trying, but you don’t see things the way I do. Never had to. Please stop pushing this. It’s hard enough as it is.” I peek out to see her staring at me, and I add, “So you’re not mad at him anymore?”

I need her not to be mad at him. And she seemed pretty pissed a week ago. It’s hard to believe that fury has died down so soon.

“A lot can happen in a week.”

“Go to him. Talk to him. Let him apologize to you. He needs you as his friend. Don’t let one thing tear you guys apart.”