I felt myself stiffen. “I’m sorry, but was that a question? Because it sure as hell sounded like you were telling me what to do. You don’t get to order me around, Kyle, not anymore. Mike is my friend. He is trying to be supportive.”
Kyle stepped away from me and hissed. “He’s not your friend, Lee. He is fucking with you to get to me. That’s the only reason he’s sniffing around you.”
I shook my head and turned away from him. “Oh my god, can you hear yourself?”
I walked away from him and headed towards the stairs.
“Where are you going? We need to talk about this. Lee?” Kyle shouted.
I swung around to face him. “My room, is that okay with you, or do you want me to leave, too?”
Kyle stepped back, like I’d just punched him in the gut. “Of course I don't. This is your home,” he said in a shocked voice.
I nodded stiffly and continued upstairs, stomping extra hard on the steps, childish, but it made me feel better.
“I don’t want him in my house again, Lee.”
I paused at the top of the stairs and turned around. Kyle was standing at the bottom of the stairs with a pained expression.
“And I don’t want you to tell me what to do,” I seethed. “We are not together. Oh, and FYI, Kyle, I can pay my own damn bills. I don’t want your money. Not one dime. You got it?”
I didn’t wait for his answer, I just stormed into my old room.
One hour, I was home less than one hour and the crap had hit the proverbial fan.
****
Kyle
One hour. Lee was home one fucking hour, and I’d screwed things up.
What the hell was wrong with me?
When I saw her standing in the back yard, I’d thought I’d imagined her. She’d looked so fucking beautiful, fragile, mine.
I’d lost my shit when I saw that prick in my house, and dammit, I’d been making progress with her. I wanted to wrap her up and carry her straight up to my room, but I’d no doubt in my mind, that if I had tried, she’d have kicked me in the balls. God knows, I would have deserved it.
Mike… She’d phoned my fucking brother to collect her. That hurt like something else. My chest was still stinging from my gloomy awareness that Lee trusted him, more than me.
I knew she’d allowed Mike to visit her in the hospital, and that knowledge all but fucking killed me.
But what could I have done about it? Not a damn thing that’s what.
She wasn’t my wife, not even my girlfriend anymore. The only part of Lee’s life that I had a say in, was the baby, but up until this point she’d wanted nothing from me or to do with me. That left me kind of fucked.
At least she was home now, back under my roof where I could keep her safe.
*****
Three hours had passed since she slammed her bedroom door, and I was getting anxious.
Was she okay? Should I knock and check on her?
I’d passed her door more than enough times to be deemed a stalker, but hell, I was worried.
I shouldn’t have gotten so angry, not in front of her at least. She was just out of the damn hospital, and of course, I’d gone bat shit crazy in front of her. Smooth. I was jealous though, jealous that she called Mike before me.
I pressed my ear against her door, hearing nothing but my own hammering heartbeat.
I tapped lightly and waited. Ten seconds passed and still nothing.
Fuck this.
I eased the handle down and pushed the door inwards slightly. She could scream at me if she wanted, I’d prefer that to finding her sick, or worse.
I peered through the crack in the door and sighed in relief.
Lee was curled up on her bed, sleeping. I opened the door fully and walked over to her quietly.
She was curled in a ball on top of the covers, with her face resting on her hands.
My gaze flicked from her face to her rounded stomach. My chest filled with hope. I wanted, more than anything, to curl up on her bed and draw her to me. But I couldn’t, she wouldn’t want me to.
I slipped back to my room and grabbed a blanket from my closet. Lee didn’t stir when I sat on her bed and set the blanket next to me.
After hearing about Lee’s miscarriage in graphic description from Derek, I was paranoid. I immediately checked the covers for blood. I was so afraid since that night. I wanted this baby. I wanted this for Lee. I wanted this for us.
I brushed a few tendrils of curls off her face. She sighed contently, moving closer to my hand.
I placed my hand on her stomach, feeling for the first time the hard swell under her belly button.
Shit, it was harder than I thought it would be. I wasn’t sure what I was expecting it to feel like, soft perhaps, cushiony. But her belly was hard.
My hand trembled and I felt guilty as shit for stealing this moment without Lee’s consent, but I was desperate to be a part of this; to be included.