“You have your brother’s blood standing in front of you,” Maelgwn said, his mocking smile and his happy, peaceful eyes taking me in. “There she stands, your blood. If your niece can bring blood back to all of us, then your line is indeed powerful magic.”
“I have held the guards in abstinence for more than a thousand years. They wait at my pleasure, and the pleasure of my son.”
“And at your niece’s pleasure,” Afagdu said. He seemed to be helping me, but I didn’t trust it. He helped no one but himself and his clan.
Andais waved that away as if it was unimportant. “Yes, yes, on Meredith’s pleasure.” She looked at me then. “Though I did not intend the pleasure to be so . . . pleasurable.” She came down the steps again, gliding toward me in her heels and silk. “The guards are for our pleasure, Meredith, not us for theirs. I’m not certain you understand that, niece.” She walked past me, and I knew where she was going.
She stopped by Nicca and Biddy where they knelt. I glanced back and found that they were holding hands. They were also staring very hard at the floor, as if she wouldn’t hurt them if they didn’t look up. If only it were that easy.
She ran her fingers through the heaviness of Nicca’s chestnut hair. He went very still under her touch. “I like him in my bed, but not for sex. He frightens so easily. He doesn’t like pain, do you, Nicca?”
If I hadn’t been kneeling within a yard of him I might not have heard his answer. “No, Queen Andais.”
“I taught him that in a night, did you know that, Meredith?”
“Taught him what, my queen?”
“To answer any question I asked him with yes or no, and never, ever to leave off the Queen Andais.” She ran her hand down the side of his face until she cupped his chin. She raised him to look at her. “Would you like another lesson, Nicca? It has been long since I made love to a man with wings. It might be interesting.”
“Queen Andais,” I said.
She didn’t even look at me.
“My queen, you said that the guards who came to my bed were mine to keep.” I made my voice as neutral as I could, but I knew it was a bad idea to say it.
“Would you not share him with me?”
I thought about that. “Perhaps, but after he and Biddy have had their night.”
She touched Biddy, turned her face upward, so she gazed down at both of them. “But if she gets with child then they will be married and monogamous, and even the Queen of Air and Darkness will not be able to force him to forsake his marriage vows.”
“My queen, Aunt Andais, if Nicca and Biddy could make a baby, then it might mean that others of the sidhe could as well. That is a good thing.”
She let go of their faces and walked between them, forcing them to let go of each other’s hands. She traced the upper edge of Nicca’s wings. “But he is mine, Meredith, my pretty toy, and I do not share my toys.”
“You said that any guard who went to the bed of the princess was hers,” Afagdu said. “Nicca is her pretty toy now.”
She turned abruptly and started walking toward Afagdu and his table of lords. “What the queen gives, the queen can take away.”
“Even the queen must honor her word,” Afagdu said, “and you gave your word before the court that the guards who went to Meredith’s bed were hers.” The fact that he would say such bald truth to an angry Andais showed how confident he was that he could survive an attack by her. There were few magicians among us who thought they were her equal in magic; Afagdu was one of them.
“Few would dare make me eat my own words in open court, Afagdu. Do not let your magic make you bold beyond your abilities.”
“Is it bold to speak the truth, my queen?”
But, of course, two could play at that particular game. “Very well, Nicca is Meredith’s now, but Biddy is not. Meredith can do as she will with Nicca, but Biddy is not hers to give to another man. Biddy belongs to my son, to Prince Cel.” She looked at me. “Would you steal even the women from his bed?”
“You cannot steal that which is offered,” I said.
“And what does that mean, Meredith, with your Seelie eyes?”
I swallowed hard, and promised myself I’d think better before I spoke next time. “The ring gave Biddy to Nicca.”
“So you say, but I say that the guards serve only my bloodline. So how do you propose to satisfy both the ring on your finger and your queen?”
“You said any guard who comes to my bed is mine to keep, correct?”
“Yes, so Afagdu has reminded me.”
“Then I will take Biddy and Nicca to my bed. Nicca will still be my lover, but he will also be Biddy’s. Will that satisfy you, Aunt Andais?”
“I have never found Nicca able to serve more than one person in a night.”
“I can bring him back to readiness with a touch,” I said.“Can you really?” Her voice was thick with scorn. Her eyes had gone back to being angry.
I didn’t like the look or the tone, but I answered her, because not answering was probably worse. “Yes, my queen, I can.”
“Is this some new ability that you have gained?”
“No, Aunt Andais, it has always been my gift.”
“I keep forgetting that you’re a fertility goddess.”
“Descended from, yes.”
“I did not think you liked women, Meredith.”
My neck was beginning to feel strained looking up at her six-foot height from my knees. “I do not, as a rule, but if this is the only way to satisfy both the ring and my queen, then I will do it.”
She walked closer to me, forcing me to move my neck even farther back, as if she knew how awkward it was. “Would you do anything to see them make this potential child a reality?”
I saw the trap in her words and tried to avoid it. “Not anything, no.”
“But much,” she said, looming over me, “you would do much to have them fuck?”
I fought the urge to sit back on my heels, anything to get my neck out of the odd position. I did not want to answer this question, nothing good would come of it.
“Answer me, Meredith.”
“Yes, Aunt Andais, I would do much so they could make the child the ring promised.”
“Why do you care if they are with child?”
“Life quickens inside them. I saw it, felt it. It is a gift of the Goddess. How can I do anything but honor that gift? You wore the ring once when it was in its full power. You must remember how it felt.”
She grabbed me by the hair, jerked my head even farther back, as if she meant to snap my neck. She growled low and close to my face. “I am not a fertility goddess. I took the ring off my enemy’s finger. It was a spoil of war, and it worked for me, but its magic and mine are not complementary. I never saw a phantom child. I saw sex, obsession, love, but children . . .” She lifted me off my knees, by my hair. I put a hand back to try to keep it from hurting so much. “I never saw any children.”
Our faces were almost touching now. It felt as if she was going to tear my hair out by the roots. “Why is it so important to you that Nicca and Biddy fuck?”
I spoke through gritted teeth, trying not to cry out. “Because I am a princess of this court and I have a chance to give the sidhe their first child in a century. It is my duty, my honor, to bring this child into being.”
She let me go so abruptly that I fell, and only Galen’s arm kept me from smacking my face against the floor. She touched his face, made him look at her. “Oh, he is angry. He doesn’t like that I’ve hurt you. I never tried him out. I always thought he would be like Nicca, too gentle in bed, but he doesn’t frighten as easily as Nicca. A disaster politically, but brave in that ‘hero destined to die for a cause’ sort of way.” She cupped his chin in her hand. “Is he any good as a lover?”
If I said yes, she might want to borrow him. If I said no, it would be a lie. He was too gentle for me, too, but when I was in the mood for gentle lovemaking, Galen was just about perfect. “I think he is too gentle for your tastes, Aunt Andais.”
“But not for yours?” She knelt down, making a pool of black silk in front of my downcast eyes.
“I have wider interests in the bedroom than you do, auntie dearest.”
“Why is it that any tender endearment from you always sounds like you’re telling me to go fuck myself?”
“I meant no disrespect.”
“I have heard that you like it rough, Meredith.” She bent down, whispering, “Not as rough as me, or Cel, but rough enough.”
“Not every night, Aunt Andais.” I did not raise my face beyond her silk lap. I was in pain and tired of her insane games. It had never occurred to me that she would see all the new magic as a threat to her. So much had happened, there hadn’t been time to keep her informed. But she was our queen, and I had made her look weak. Because she got her reports from others, the entire court knew I did not respect her enough to keep her informed or ask her opinion. If she was going this crazy about smaller things, what would she do when she found out that the chalice had returned and I had not told her that either? But that was something I would not reveal before the entire court. It was too dangerous.
“If you are not with child, you will never be queen.” She spoke into my hair.
“Keeping Nicca and Biddy from their child will not gain me one,” I said.